* Posts by Martin Lyne

577 publicly visible posts • joined 12 Nov 2007

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Designer pitches solar-powered AA battery

Martin Lyne

Good idea

You could extend it by having devices allow extension of panel when in use, or more likely, their own panel built in. Assuming charging mode disbles the device, varying battery output probably not a good thing.

Stick some flexy E-Ink shit on the back and you have yourselves a rechargable eNewspaper/eBook reader.

Don't delay: Delete your DNA today

Martin Lyne

Does it matter?

When they'll still be watching all your emails, text messages, phone calls, brain waves, etc.

US firm vies for Opteron packaging excess crown

Martin Lyne

This..

..calls for dramatic/cataclysmic music and nice panning photos in a video.

If I had a day ff I would just sit there and laugh at an aboxalypse now montage.

Web more popular than sex, says Intel

Martin Lyne

Does this account

..for those of us where they are one and the same?

A cruel choice, to be sure.

Mercedes reveals plug-in, fuel-cell concept cars

Martin Lyne

Dashboard

Dashboard looks like soemthing you'd get in a McDonald™'s Happy Meal™ after a enw Teenage Mutant Hero Turtles™ film is released (or more accurately, for the 17 months preceding that event)

Welsh Tories ask taxpayers to pick up iPod tab

Martin Lyne

You. Fucking. What?!

Nice to see taxpayer's money being squandered by the oh-so-sensible conservatives (conserving their own lavish lifestyle in an economic battleground)

£1000 for a "missing" TV? Someone should be fucking lynched, IMMEDIATELY.

Porkbarrel shit is bad enough but having to subsidise personal TVs, disgraceful. Some plasma for presentations would be an understandable (at least marginally) expense. But "whoops, it dropped off the radar" is like saying "fuck you constituents, and thanks for the nice digs/gear/gold teeth/platinum-plated car!"

I don't even know why you'd cover a car in platinum, it'd react with other people's exhausts like a giant catalytic converter, wouldn't it?

Fah!

Grove: Intel should make electric car batteries

Martin Lyne

Re:Perhaps they should make cars too ..

Why sad face? They all look the same anyway. Maybe if they started making old Mustangs again people might buy them.

Cars all seem to look the same as they did during the X-Files, where they all looked the same too.

Guess GM shouldn't have scrapped their EV1s, ha!

Nintendo whacked with $5m Wii strap lawsuit

Martin Lyne

Nope..

I can't find any Samsung TVs on Amazon for circa £3.3mil.

Oh there is a link to greedy compensation culturists.

Throwing knives is dangerous, they don't even come with straps.

La Cie's quiet fans

Martin Lyne

Also:

Looks awesome.

I wouldn't wnat to turn them on becuase they're so pretty..

Atari promises it won't suck this time

Martin Lyne

The had better not..

screw up Star Trek Online. Seriously. There are quite enough swords and goblins and not enough space stuff. EVE Online and Jumpgate (old or new) are all that I can think of.

I'm sick of playing "a hero" I just want to be a part of somethign larger with the occasional and random opportunity to be a hero.

And blow spaceships up.

Why port your Firefox add-on to Internet Explorer?

Martin Lyne

The answer

to the question is "so you can test it without fear of normal users using it"

IE should die.

Apple files 3D-interface patent

Martin Lyne

Erm

I'm fairly sure I've seen something like this demo'd already (had physics too so you could stack and spread and throw documents around), not by apple, not to mention plenty of games have 3D interfaces.

3D is great, look how well Aero sold. Oh wait.

Hawaii says 'aloha' to Phoenix electric SUVs, pick-ups

Martin Lyne

But..

..it looks like a real car!

Someone pulled their head from their rectum! Fantastic!

Max Planck Institute punts 'hot, young housewives'

Martin Lyne

At least..

It doesn't just say "TRANSLATE SERVER ERROR" or something.

Or indeed "HANDJOBS: £10" etc. etc.

"North [of China]" made me laugh. I was hoping they'd imported some Scots.

WordPad zero-day adds to MS security woes

Martin Lyne

Honk-honk!

Your failboat has arrived.

Good way to get people to move to Vista or Linux though. Make all the old Windows security risks again.

Indian court urged to 'ban Google Earth'

Martin Lyne

Let's not forget..

..guns, eyes and hands. All vital to the terrorist cause.

Harvard prof slams US nut allergy hysteria

Martin Lyne

They clearly..

They don't care about people dying, they care about people *suing*

If you're alergic to nuts then you'd probably know you were and would rub yourself over recently-nutted floors.

And if you do: Darwinism.

Forget about nailbombs, next generation of domestic terrorists will be using peanut and shrimp bombs. Keep your mouths closed! (A handy safety tip from opposition-opposed governments)

Four-year-old Diebold glitch silently drops votes

Martin Lyne

Let's see.

Push a fucking button. Store a fucking record.

I know 12 year olds that could code this. Well I don't *know* any, but I'm sure they exist.

Abbey IT upgrade 'chaos' hits small biz banking

Martin Lyne

Ha

Scabbey National wouldnt give me a student account becuase.. I was a student and wouldn't be in full-time work.

Fail.

Natwest have been much more helpful ever since.

I know I didn't need to recant that to you, but tough.

Oz men's mag recovers inflatable jubs

Martin Lyne

Oh..

*stops scouring satellite ocean photos*

Government plans emergency extranet

Martin Lyne

"They have signed a contract with BT"

Good start. How long beofre all the kit gets nicked?

Why Morgan Stanley had to pay that $15m email fine

Martin Lyne

:P

Go Team Register!

*shakes pom-poms*

Firm touts anti-radiation chip for phones

Martin Lyne

Hmm

The zombie of Faraday will be heading straight to these morons.

Just wear a lead hat. With a wooden outer layer. Preferably under SIX FEET OF DIRT. Might as well tell us Religion A protects from electro magnetic waves.

Oh noes, the infrared is going to keel mee!

Intel trumpets world's fastest silicon photonic detector*

Martin Lyne

I..

I for one welcome our city-stomping, aphid-munching, homo-gendered ladylords.

Oh, it's a chip, not Manhatten..

Hackintosh clone surfaces in the Argentine

Martin Lyne

No company..

guarantees software will run on a given [non-bespoke] machine , not even the software comanies will make any similar claims. Do Apple guarantee shit will work on Macs?

Google spews desktop ads onto Satan, Jesus Phones

Martin Lyne

If it subsidises the phone

go for it.

I'd like a cheap Touch HD with Android on it. Preferably one with a nicer camera and multi-touch, but we can't have everything..

Fiat shows solar-panel wrapped 'Panda of the future'

Martin Lyne

Oh god..

Do they want to kill EVs with hideous designs?

THEY. DON'T. HAVE. TO. LOOK. DIFFERENT.

Less money spent on flair, more on ACTUALLY MAKING THEM AVAILABLE.

Entire class fails IT exam by submitting in Word format

Martin Lyne

Or..

..the infallible edexcel could just reevaluate them after they've been converted.

http://www.geocities.com/edexhell/Whathavetheydonewrong.htm

It's hard enough to get a fucking education, give the kids a break. Morons.

(Although, I do promote open standards, but penalising people who are stuck in the MS sinkhole is not fair)

Barrow boy Microsoft flogs nostalgic tragic t-shirts

Martin Lyne
Gates Horns

Glorifying..

Glorifying recklessness on the roads? A sideways method of promoting working from home via MS products/clouds no doubt.

Presumbaly it's ok to pirate their software too. I'll just end up on a t-shirt.

Aussie government to rig filter testing

Martin Lyne

Could ISPs please..

.. filter the Young Labour portions of government websites.

DISSENTING VOICES WILL NOT BE ACCEPTED!

They do realise they weren't meant to follow China's lead, right? It's a short step from blocking X to blocking Y(oung Labour). See what I did there?

DARPA orders 'fridge-sized' laser energy cannon

Martin Lyne

So..

they just want to shrink the MTHEL then?

EDS carpeted for struggling prison project

Martin Lyne

Erm

I could knock up something fairly similar for a few grand. This is the UK taxpayer being held over a (pork)barrel.

And they couldn't even keep it secure.

Megalithic Fail.

Jacqui promotes police handhelds

Martin Lyne

Er

How is this more cost efficient than just a few more radio operators back at base? Maybe for rural bobbies (although, they don't need PDAs as they are, you know, extinct). But for the rest, they have radios in car and about their person. And phones. Less sepdning of the money and while you;re at it, less making up stupid crap because you feel you need to do high-profile things.

Electric car seller hits brakes as UK EV sales plunge

Martin Lyne

I'd

Never heard of these. But I only get my news from bbc.co.uk and El Reg.. shame. Also: yeah the quad/safety exemption thing would have put me off. Even if human death is the besat thing for the environment, I don't think it's a great marketing point.

Microsoft preps IE 8 for the web-challenged

Martin Lyne

Or..

..the daft twunts at microsoft could just *make their shit work* or *fucking give up and install the top 3 open source browsers that are tried and tested*

Much better than all this "lets confuse people out of the internet with out shoddy software and lacklustre application of commonly accepted standards"

For every shit browser they make the cost web developers the world over time and money. Congrats MS. Nice work with Vista by the way as well.

[Try to upload a file to FTP in Vista it pops up "Are you sue you want to overwrite?" and then as you;re about to click it pops up "calculating transfer time" DIRECTLY OVER THE BUTTONS. Doesn't remember where you move it to. Ever overwriting file = huge frustration over the simple things.

Customs warns of killer consoles

Martin Lyne

But..

..the consoles actually *work*?

130,000 inflatable jubs missing at sea

Martin Lyne

This article

is no good without (satellite) pictures.

CSC orders staff home in cost-cutting shutdown

Martin Lyne

How many

CEOs/High-level Execs will take a pay cut, or go unpaid for a bit?

Competition watchdog bounces BBC, ITV and C4's web TV plan

Martin Lyne

Er

Nobody is going to set up a sky account to watch something they could get free on TV, just becuase.. they can get it free online, but in one place.

Nor is anyone going to leave sky becuase they can watch some Channel 4 and BBC stuff online.

Nobody gives a shit what ITV do, c'mon. Unless Coronation Street is invaded by Soviets or soemthing, you know, INTERESTING. :P

Supersonic fighters could snuff out hurricanes

Martin Lyne

Er..

Phantom IIs are pretty old.. would one stand up to a hurricane? Let alone the Eye/Tempset interface. Wouldn't all the water in the air mess up the engines?

Forget bird-strikes.

FISH-STRIKES.

Or TRAWLER-STRIKES if an unfortunate boat got caught up in it all..

Nuke-nobbler raygun 747 in first full-power blast

Martin Lyne

Plan

1 - Get Cuba or some S. American country to host an ICBM of yours

2 - Chest thump at the US of A

3 - Wait til ABM is flying patrols over the US.

4 - Shoot it down, spilling corrosive chemicals all over a city from a great height

5 - Profit (presumably)

How come people complain about nuclear space rpobes doing the bidding of science, but thousands of gallons of toxic-soon-to-be-toxicer chemicals flying around?

Lasers are cool and everything, but the precision one discussed recently is more interesting nad useful, unless they can get the ABL to refract off the atmosphere and hit targets over the horizon or bounce it off a space mirror (oh noes, a mirror in space! it will fall and kill us all!) then I'm not sure how useful they'll be without a whole fleet airborne in the immediate vicinity tat are pointing in the right direction as an ICBM *happens* to launch. (How long do 747s take to turn around? What happens if there's lots of cloud cover?)

New terror guidelines on photography

Martin Lyne

Because..

When taking photos to plot your terrorist scheme.. you always carrys your signed and photo-IDd "International Terrorist's Support Forum" membership card.

WHAT FUCKING GOOD IS STOPPING AND SEARCHING THEM?

If they're taking pictures.. chances are *it's still in the planning stage*.

Are we meant to close our eyes when police cars go past? I routinely watch films with my eyes closed incase I accidentally remember it at a later date (not too troubling a worry with recent "blockbusters"). Remember: RECORDING EQUIPMENT IS STRICTLY FORBIDDEN.

Down the Digital River, into the heart of download darkness

Martin Lyne

Same old

If you lose a cd they won't send you a new one becuase they treat it as a product.

If you want to use the software on more than one machine you can't becuase in this instance tehy treat it like a license.

If their software screws up your shit, it's your fault, becuase they protect themselves with the EULA.

Aren't we all used to getting boned these days?

Steam/Impulse are the closest things to fair you can get, so they get my money everytime. Massive kudos to their post-release support (Galactic Civilisations+ has to be the best supported/expanded software I've ever seen. Kudos)

Snipers - Cowardly assassins, or surgical soldiers?

Martin Lyne

A scary video

Showing you just how unrealistic films can be.

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=6760530260633420235

Next time you see someone hide behind a barrel or US mail box.. just consider.

Er, I thought this was relevant due to the collateral damage/assault rifle paragraphs.

HTC Touch HD Windows Mobile smartphone

Martin Lyne
IT Angle

Er

It's not the fact that you're not far away from a power point that makes it annoying, its the fact that you then have to carry a charger with you, just in case you get called more often than usual and it dies at midday.

I don't care hwo shitting nice your phone's UI is if I have to carry a lumpy charger in my pocket and the shitting thing won't turn on anyway.

Now.. can IPhonists please stop infecting smart phone reviews, some people are actually trying to make informed decisions here, you went for an over priced toy, fine, I want something I can fiddle with without duffing the warranty.

You don't need to advertise the iPhone. EVER AGAIN. You won't change peoples' minds. If they're reading a review about another phone, chances are they will not suddenly go "Oh, the iPhone - I FORGOT ALL ABOUT THAT ONE!"

Don't suppose anyone went from a k800i to this did they? I'd be interested to hear your thoughts. Cybershot insta-pictures are great, is it worth the trade-off?

Peaches Geldof - she's back!

Martin Lyne

Anyone that says

You know I don't follow fashion BECAUSE.. (and the becuase is not followed with "I have a combover")

Is worse than mindless sheeple following fashion, for they are trying to be either counterculture types (rebelling by creating a new norm, rebellion fail) or just trying to lead the new mainstream fashion (just fail fail, really)

To quote Strike Anywhere, "Prisoner Echoes"

" [...] I see the 'Young Revolutionaries' changing clothes, living in condition while the third world grows weary of supporting all the costume changes [...]"

More stuff that lasts, less cheap fashion and vapid people talking about it.

US Army in $50m video game upgrade

Martin Lyne

Operation Flashpoint

OpFlash 2 should be out soon(ish). Coincidink?

Facebook wins record $873m fine against smut spammer

Martin Lyne

@ Ted Treen

0-4 year olds are ok with it though?

But seriously, spammers are scum, he should have to spend 10 hours a day sorting spam from real mail somewhere. See how he shitting well likes it.

YouTube virals must play by US ad rules

Martin Lyne

Hmm

People who believe adverts.. worrying.

People who believe interweb videos.. worryinger.

Does it feel good when I twist your circuits?

Martin Lyne

@Dave

Infrared, X-rag, gamma ray, terahertz, the rest of the non-visible-light spectrum images

;D

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