* Posts by StillNoCouch

66 posts • joined 7 Mar 2007


Comcast accuses FCC of impotence


I am a ComCastic Survivor

I was happy as a clam with my TimeWeiner ISP in Minneapolis, MN (yes, USA) until some behind the sceens silliness went on and I was politely told that I the Metro Minneapolis/St.Paul area was now ComCastic (as of three days before the notification).

Since then, service as slowed to a crawl ... It takes 3 minutes on Cable Broadband to open YeahRight's home page and almost as long for a simple Google front-page.

I don't do lots of surfing or downloading and patently NO file sharing.

Anyone know where I can get a decent Sat-Dish ? Frankly, this tin-foil hat's starting to have an adverse reaction.

Analysts call for secure Facebook access for workers

Paris Hilton

Highly Improbable

About the same likelihood as monkies flying out of my A$$.

Just what is the business purpose again ? I must have missed that part. Oh yeah, needless absorbtion of bandwidth.

Hold on, I have to go drop an emoticon on Ashley Alexandra Dupre's MySpace page then get back to my Scrabulous.

Rent-a-bot gang rises from the DDoS ashes


I'm sure it's annonymitized

... Sorry, I'll be leaving now.

Home Secretary in ID card gaffe


Why bother hacking in the first place ?

One could simply wait by the post for the CD's to be randomly delivered.

(OK, I'm leaving now ... )

Phorm launches data pimping fight back


CW for Prez

"It's important to understand the distinction between actually recording stuff and concluding stuff ..."

So if I sneak into your room behind your back and read your diary, that's not an invasion of privacy -- unless I xerox it ?

WTF ??? (ergo the Stop Sign)


Good Job on this story Chris & El Reg !

Yahoo! seeks time out on Microsoft bid

Paris Hilton

I must have missed this

I'm watching this deal like a train-wreck about to happen.

Like I always say, "Winning the Lottery is one thing, knowing you're going to win is a whole lot more fun!"

Either way, this will play out fabulously ...

Paris: 'Cause even she's better to look at than either the parts or the sum of this deal.

Broadband big boys waiting on data pimping

Paris Hilton

Target What ?

What's wrong with existing advertising ? It seems to work fine when used with a modicum of sense.

I've actually visited some of the sponsors of this site because their product and/or service offerings were what I was here to learn about and research anyway -- I don't know, maybe "relevant" is the operative word.

That's targeted advertising ... hawk software and hardware on an IT related site ... hawk leather under-roos on spanky-vision sites ...

How pretentious and self-absorbed are these 'data miners' to presume that they can gleen a clue what I'm likely to purchase by looking at my browsing history ? I already have a "hot chick" at home. Any advertiser thinking they can sell me another one based upon my surfing proclivities is absolutely out of their minds.

So if I spend a week researching vacation spots and Googling "Aruba Nude Beaches" ... then hit Travelocity ... I'm assuming their data mining experts will kick in the next week with advertisements for burn cream and debt-counseling services as well as STD Clinics near my anonymised location ?

How many yellow thongs do these people think I need ? It's a pointless, profitless intrusion into my privacy and yellow-thong proclivities based upon some marketing brainiac's assumption that he/she can predict my future purchases based upon my browsing history ? WTF logic is that ? Even dumber are the companies that think this stuff actually works in the first place.

Yeppers, this is truly creepy and upsetting. I'll be watching for this state-side for sure ... First, I didn't get my Geoffery b-day card, now this ... what a week !

Paris = If my internet activity influences what I see on my screen, I would rather have a semi-retarded blonde shoved in my face than a thumb-up my arse, a penguin, dead vulture, etc. -- where's the "Hot black chick in yellow thong on Aruban beach" icon anyway ?

BT pimped customer web data to advertisers last summer


This is not good

This is very troubling ... much like "Crossing the Streams" in Ghostbusters kind-of-bad.

A Delaware company with servers in China ... I can't wait to clear out my Temporary Internet folders before the tainted dumplings start to rot.

I'm seriously looking forward to hearing more about this. Great Job El Reg !

Got an amicable a*se? We have the job for you

Thumb Up

Possible Candidate

I have a great candidate in mind ...


Germans send teen tearaway to Siberia


On the fence on this one

Of course, Russian soil isn't that popular of a tourist destination these days for Germans. I think it has something to do with their last mass-visit in the 1940's.

AOL tosses Netscape into the dustbin of history


Better to Decrease the Surplus Population

I had no clue they even made the stuff anymore. I hear AOL is still alive too, but that's just an unconfirmed rummor.

Never use an internet translator to hire a gorilla


Cow Tipping Gone Wild

Personally, I think the poor cow was high on AquaDots.

Pennsylvania woman in legal doo-doo for lav profanities


"Slough" ? </More Bottom Feeding>

Yet another fine example of Da-Reg slumping to the bottom of the wit-pile again. "Slough" ?

As self-mindful of the authors and commentors here are of their position within the IT community, I'm somewhat amazed at the continued bashing of us Yanks.

I keep forgetting that this last-bastion of intelligence crowd of Ameri-Bashers invented Unix -- no wait. You didn't.

Oh, you've got the claim to fame of having invented and developed the PC -- oops, my bad. Wrong on that one too.

But, thankfully, you've invented any of the world's most used operating systems ... No, wait -- that doesn't apply here either.

Hide behind the "dot.uk" URL if it makes you feel pompous ... Well, no wait, we gave that to you too. Everyone knows where the web came from.

Wow ... all of this Yank bashing going on here lately from some poor-orphaned step-child pissing in his/her warm beer about how wonderfully intelligent they are ...mocking the hand that fed them (and continues to feed them).

Heck, I've been in this business for over 20 years and I can't possibly name a single computer, operating system or program worth anything that has the "Made in the UK" label on it.

Sorry, I'm just sayin.

Laugh all you want. I'm a little busy replacing your "arses" to listen to your sophomoric name-calling right now.

(Oh gee, which Emoticon to choose ? I'm sure you invented that concept too) ... what ? No animated burning American-Flag. Geese, this site is just getting sad.

Americans' interest rates plummet


Wit, intelligence or Bush Bashing ?

I would have expected comments to be far more intelligent that many of those appearing above.

Lest we forget whom saved whom's "arse" after having handed it to them only shortly before ...

" I'm just sayin' "

El Reg deploys (extra) comment icons

Black Helicopters

The end of the universe

What ? No animated emoticons to screw with my brain patterns ?

How about taking a few suggestions ... "Thumb-Drive", "DRM-Disallowed", etc.

By the way (BTW for some of you), it's "Minnesota", not "Montana"

Irish donkey sex case shocks net


I think I know her !

I wept when I read this touching story of a Man and his Donkey.

I remember prom night too.

Nothing but the stars in the sky, the wind in our hair and the smell of tanning oil upon our bodies as we lay there, content ... in the after-glow of having kicked the daylights out of the mini-bar. We were young then ...

... Oh, the memories !


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