* Posts by Jeroen Braamhaar

158 posts • joined 22 Oct 2007

Page:

YouTuber cements head inside microwave oven

Jeroen Braamhaar

It's a good nomination though, although not (yet) worthy of an Award.

33
0

US intelligence blabs classified Linux VM to world via leaky S3 silo

Jeroen Braamhaar
Black Helicopters

CLOUD:

Catastrophic

Loss

Of

Uncontrollable

Data

22
2

Windows Update borks elderly printers in typical Patch Tuesday style

Jeroen Braamhaar
Holmes

Because VueScan's business model relies on them supporting the hardware.

MS's business model relies on locking people in and then pumping out as many useless brittle features people didn't ask for and can't control, all the while only caring that that the customer's computer supports the downloading of the latest version, and the customer's wallet supports paying for it.

7
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American upstart seeks hotshot guinea pig for Concorde-a-like airliner

Jeroen Braamhaar

Hmmm

Interesting how the XB-70 Valkyrie has been completely forgotten.

This was a plane contemporary with (and similarly sized as) both Concorde and the Tu-144 ... yet was capable of cruising at Mach 3.

Only 2 prototypes were ever built, and the 1960's emphasis on ballistic missiles (plus a fatal midair crash on a photo op flight of all things) put an end to the program before it ever had the chance to fully develop.

AFAIK, the second prototype achieved Mach 3.4 on a test flight ...

both planes were turned over to NASA Dryden Flight Research Center where they conclusively proved that sonic booms and population centers were an incredibly poor mixture :D

http://xb70.interceptor.com/ for its intriguing story!

10
1

Storms blow away 2017 Solar Challenge field

Jeroen Braamhaar

If the idea is to get these contraptions ready for actual real world use, wouldn't testing them under real world conditions make more sense ?

Which they just ran into. And complained bitterly about.

The Wright Brothers had brass balls of steel to venture into largely unknown territory with things nobody had even tried before. Electric and solar power hass been tried for the better part of 25-30 years and it still doesn't work (and if you believe it does, I'd gleefully remind you of South Australia's ability to keep the lights on), and barring a shift to an absolutist world government decreeing it the winner, it won't (something to do with lack of energy density, overly large dependency on 'just the right' environmental conditions etc)

But I admit, it makes a wonderful festival parade.

5
17
Jeroen Braamhaar
Holmes

"Team Arrow founder Cameron Tuesley explained the conditions that made finishing so difficult this year, saying “we had 40 degree heat, tropical storms, major thunderstorms, severe cross winds, dust constantly, animals all over the road, major trucks, pretty much everything you can throw at something were thrown at us”."

In other words, they had all this icky nasty weather that normal vehicles drive through everyday ?

And that was a problem ?

*walks away laughing*

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20

BOFH: Oh dear. Did someone get lost on the Audit Trail?

Jeroen Braamhaar

.... THIS TIME .... who knows what will happen to them if them pesky auditors persist ...

9
0

Microsoft touts next Windows 10 Creators Update: It's set for a Fall

Jeroen Braamhaar

Failed Creation Edition!

All I wanted was a Windows where I'm in control.

Not looking like it's gonna happen, think I'll sit this one out.

8
2

Well this is awkward. As Microsoft was bragging about Office at Build, Office 365 went down

Jeroen Braamhaar

Re: Cloud just means...

Cloud:

A computing service that signifies you do not know where any outage is, who is responsible for it, who else but you or your organization accesses the data on it, but nobody wants to do without.

Complete Loss Of Uncontrollable Data ?!

46
1

What is this bullsh*t, Google? Nexus phones starved of security fixes after just three years

Jeroen Braamhaar

(Currently) content Nexus 6 owner here, which was my first smartphone ... and it looks like it's also my last one as well.

Smartphones are a great convenience, but if I have to chuck out my perfectly good servicable phone every 2-3 years to boost their device sales bottom line, I'd rather spend a few tenners on a shitty feature phone with only 2-3 years life expectancy.

6
0

Microsoft promises twice-yearly Windows 10, O365 updates – with just 18 months' support

Jeroen Braamhaar
Facepalm

Astounded ...

I knew MS was good at shooting themselves in the foot, and getting (a lot) better at it ever since W10 ...

...but this isn't just "accidentally" shooting yourself in the foot anymore, this is more akin to pulling pins from hand grenades and intentionally dropping them at your feet!

I can't even think of a better way for MS to lose the desktop market advantage they had - this might end up driving adoption of thin clients (and face it, a console or phone/tablet is really a (moderately smart but still very dependent) thin client connecting to a server farm elsewhere) so very hard.

7
1

China emerges as digital rights champion with new info privacy law

Jeroen Braamhaar
Big Brother

tl;dr

"Nobody other than us gets to spy on our citizens!"

6
0

Put down your coffee and admire the sheer amount of data Windows 10 Creators Update will slurp from your PC

Jeroen Braamhaar

Re: I thought

You can always go to the other locked down, no choices-but-their-choice computing device: the games console.

5
0
Jeroen Braamhaar
Black Helicopters

Re: Soft target?

Because we don't need to use a smartphone running Goopple's OS to make a phone call - we just use them because they're convenient, plentiful and we don't really have an expectation of privacy or control over it - after all, the only real control you have on your phone is when you hang up (and remain connected to the network and be available) or turn it off and aren't - and remember you can pick up a cheapo feature phone and it'll connect to the network just fine, avoiding all the conveniences of data slurpage other than where you are (for obvious reasons) ... well for now at least. (I think I just heard a black helicopter)

With a computer it's different. We have expectation of privacy, being able to choose what we share, what we connect to and what we do; and an expectation of control: when we do our updates (if at all), what we install, what we keep, where we keep it and how.

MS just put a huge bomb under that with Win10, and given there's this really huge ruckus going on about privacy and exactly what control an end user has over that data he generates, that large corps profit from, resell and share (willingly or not) with whatever weird acronym agency just happens to be interested makes this a rather sticky point.

They have perfectly played the user inertia card (I honestly tried to get family/friends over on Openoffice but they all went back to MS' offering because reasons (school/work/buttons are different/don't want to learn) - whereas mentioned before, changing phones is a much more hassle-free experience.

9
3
Jeroen Braamhaar

I always understood that a privacy policy was something that assured your privacy was kept, not taken away.

37
1
Jeroen Braamhaar

Paying beta tester/advertising target market/gullible mark/other

Any or all of the above combined.

23
0
Jeroen Braamhaar
Mushroom

MS sure has an interesting definition of 'privacy' ...

says Marisa Rogers, the Windows and Devices group privacy officer.

"The Windows 10 Creators Update is a significant step forward, but by no means the end of our journey," she said.

...where the "step forward" is into the abyss Wile E. Coyote style, and the end of this journey is being of course, to be relegated to the history books as soon possible.

33
1

New plastic banknote plans now upsetting environmental campaigners

Jeroen Braamhaar
Facepalm

best solution!

Render down all the protesters.

33
11

FYI Docs.com users: You may have leaked passwords, personal info – thousands have

Jeroen Braamhaar
FAIL

Wait, so ....

"The problem was two-fold. First, people weren't always marking sensitive documents as private and non-public"

So the default settings for your own documents are "visible to all and sundry" unless you go to the (likely well obfuscated) privacy settings to restrict who can find them ??!

I'm not sure there's a facepalm in this universe big enough.

16
0

Tesla 'API crashes' after update, angry rich bods complain

Jeroen Braamhaar
Big Brother

Connected vehicles:

"I'm sorry Dave, I can't let you drive that."

13
0

Become a blockchain-secured space farmer with your hard drive

Jeroen Braamhaar
Big Brother

Um ....

I also wonder about the liability issues:

- Who is liable if data is lost/becomes unavailable

- Who is liable if (some of) this data turns out to be involved in criminal activity

- Who is liable if, god forbid, this turns into a data exfiltration method

- What's going to happen if this gets involved in a nation state secrets or "terrorist activity", and what implications does that have for the unknowing users storing bits and pieces of data, both within and outside said nation state ?

...and that's just off the top of my head.

1
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Dying for Windows 10 Creators Update? But wait, there's more!

Jeroen Braamhaar

Re: ugh

But but, Win10 is better than Chrome, it routes EVEN MORE info through Microsoft!

/sarc

10
4

Drop the F-bomb, get your coding typos auto-corrected

Jeroen Braamhaar

This sounds like ...

...a new implementation of DWIM (Do What I Mean):

http://www.catb.org/jargon/html/D/DWIM.html

... and like the earlier implementation referenced, likely that a similar problem will have at least one user shout out this new implementation's name loudly ;-)

12
0

Naughty sysadmins use dark magic to fix PCs for clueless users

Jeroen Braamhaar

surprised ...

...because El Reg has its own resident fictional sysadmin in-house already!

Fear the BOFH's wrath when he discovers he's been overlooked!

13
0

Google tests Android Instant Apps streamed on-demand to mobes

Jeroen Braamhaar

Uhm ...

Just so I understand:

Rather than download the app and run it local whenever you need it, you get to open a connection to a remote server in a jurisdiction not of your choice, with laws you might not agree to, to receive the data ... every time you need said application.

So

1) This might save you on wait time initially

2) This will not, in the end, save you on connection fees

3) This will remove control the user has over his own data (quelle surprise, this being google)

4) This puts more control at the remote endpoint (where/whover that is) to profile the user

5) And people think this is a great solution ?

Uhm, I have this wonderful bridge ...

6
0

Korean boffins vow 1,000km-an-hour supertrain

Jeroen Braamhaar

The Koreans once claimed their KTX high speed train (which they bought from France) wouldn't derail in an earthquake like the Japanese Shinkansen.

The Japanese pointed out it takes an earthquake to derail a shinkansen.

For the KTX it just requires a curve. :)

9
1

Oh ALIS, don't keep us waiting: F-35 jet's software 'delayed'

Jeroen Braamhaar

old military wisdom has it ...

...that the side with the simplest uniforms usually wins.

it could be suggested as a modern-day corollary that the side with the simplest servicable weapons has the better chance of victory too.

And since the only battle an F35 is likely to fight is the struggle to leave the ground - where the only clouds it is likeliest to see are composed of big data instead of big amounts of water vapor ... well ...

9
1

NASA taps ESA satellite Swarm for salty ocean temperature tales

Jeroen Braamhaar

Re: Hmmm....

Ah, I see a correction is in order

https://wattsupwiththat.files.wordpress.com/2016/09/earth_timeline2.jpg

10
1

Put walls around home Things, win $25k from US government

Jeroen Braamhaar
Angel

I'm all for walls around IoT devices

And please, do dispense with doors, ducts, windows and other unnecessary openings.

0
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How Rogue One's Imperial stormtroopers SAVED Star Wars and restored order

Jeroen Braamhaar
Holmes

on that (lack of) accuracy claim:

"Only Imperial Stormtroopers are that precise" - Obi-Wan Kenobi

Merry Xmas :)

25
0

Surveillance camera compromised in 98 seconds

Jeroen Braamhaar
Big Brother

Let's hit on a solution ...

The best solution to the IoT pwnage problem is, of course, the humble hammer.

However, where to vigorously and repeatedly apply it is a point of debate, but here's a shortlist of targets to consider:

- the manufacturer, for baking fixed credentials

- the government, for twiddling thumbs

- the blokes running Mirai for obvious reasons

- the device class, for offering solutions to a problem nobody is having

- you, for falling for the IoT neofilia scam

;-)

14
1

Musk: Got best battery ever

Jeroen Braamhaar
Mushroom

Didn't Samsung have this superphone with a really amazing battery too ?

Rethink what a battery can do! :D

4
1

Is this the worst Blockchain idea you've ever heard?

Jeroen Braamhaar
Go

Obviously, totally in the spirit of the article and the proffered competition, adding a blockchain ledger to the poll to determine the eventual victor would be an absolute requirement.

17
0

Devs! Here's how to secure your IoT network, in, uh, 75 easy pages

Jeroen Braamhaar
Devil

How to secure IoT in one easy comment

1. Disallow/reject on network

2. Hunt devices with clawhammer if needed

3. Hunt (l)users bringing said devices with clawhammer if needed

4. Make this a signposted, less-than-zero-tolerance policy

5. Dispose of all evidence

6. (Id)IoT problem solved

7. ???

8. Profit

8
0

Source code unleashed for junk-blasting Internet of Things botnet

Jeroen Braamhaar
Mushroom

"Reiner Kappenberger, global product manager at data security firm HPE Security, argued more guidance for IoT manufacturers was needed."

As far as I can see the best 'guidance' is steering whoever invents a new (id)IoT problem-in-search-of-a-solution device behind the shed .... and delivering a mercy bullet.

1
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Google finds its G Suite spot: Renames apps, talks up AI and BigQuery

Jeroen Braamhaar
Black Helicopters

The key quote of the article

The goal here, said Prabhakar Raghavan, VP of engineering for Google Apps, is "to get away from the notion that content is owned by individuals."

All your content are belong to us (oh and any intelligence agencies that come knocking)

Snort.

12
0

Microsoft chatbots: Sweet XiaoIce vs foul-mouthed Tay

Jeroen Braamhaar
WTF?

Uh...

Did Microsoft just admit that oppressive government censorship is a good thing because it turned their chatbot sugary sweet and suggested it would 'fix' people the same way ?

6
1

No wonder we're being hit by Internet of Things botnets. Ever tried patching a Thing?

Jeroen Braamhaar
Happy

Acronymize please!

Insecure

Default

Internet

of

Things

4
0

My God, I've got nothing on! Microsoft's $200m Wunderlist is down

Jeroen Braamhaar
Black Helicopters

Quote: At the time Microsoft reckoned the deal demonstrated its: “Commitment to delivering market leading mobile apps across the platforms and devices our customers use"

By simply exterminating the competition so the only choice people have ?

I see that's working out pretty well :D

5
1

Samsung intros super-speedy consumer SSDs, 'fastest M.2s ever'

Jeroen Braamhaar

Re: Has to be said:

"Rethink what an SSD can do!"

0
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She cannae take it, Captain Kirk! USS Zumwalt breaks down

Jeroen Braamhaar

Maybe they should water down .... oh wait, I guess they tried that and it broke :D

1
0

Samsung's latest blowup

Jeroen Braamhaar

I guess this news must have exploded Samsung into action.

0
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Samsung wants your exploding Galaxy Note 7. Have a new one instead

Jeroen Braamhaar

Samsung: "Rethink what a phone can do!"

Joe Public: "Yeah I never expected the darn thing in my pocket to be a f**king incendiary device"

:D

6
0

United States Air Force grounds F-35As after cooling kit cracks up

Jeroen Braamhaar
Mushroom

"Not compatible with fuel"

I'd be more inclined to label the entire F35 project as "not compatible with anything but a paper political specification", since it doesn't seem to be compatible with staying aloft, nor compatible with active service, nor compatible with anything but carefully scripted exercises, after which it must be tenderly coddled by specially-compatible technicians.

The only compatibility other than the paper spec seems related to large amounts of bacon ... or more precisely pork.

42
0

Brave telco giants kill threat of decent internet service in rural North Carolina

Jeroen Braamhaar

Re: Only in US

Regarding water: Flint, Michigan.

Land of the Free ... to move someplace where bigcorps offer you services rather than sue your council to take it away. :(

17
0

Anti-piracy site DDoSed

Jeroen Braamhaar
Mushroom

I guess they got some internet based 'penalty letters' thrown back at them.

0
0

Thermostat ransomware

Jeroen Braamhaar

Re: Oh FFS

You mean on April 1st ?

1
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Modular phone Ara to finally launch

Jeroen Braamhaar

hmmm

I can't see this as a successful mass market product .. but maybe in specialized/closed markets it might succeed - like a field service engineer's phone/diagnostics link, or issues as corporate phone with approved (ie no camera, no removable storage) modules ... and of course the inevitable hobbyist and tinkerer market

0
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First successful Hyperloop test module hits 100mph in four seconds

Jeroen Braamhaar
Holmes

Basically it's a giant vacuum hamster tube and they expect people to trust their lives to it ?

Madness.

2
6

Samsung tightens smart home kit security after curious bods prod apps

Jeroen Braamhaar

I said it before ...

Insecure

Default

Internet

of

Things

1
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