Replying this far down...
...to preserve the illusion. Thank you, El Reg. Now I have a hardlink to an article I can present whenever anyone asks me "What is a troll?" No, it's not being nasty or insulting, that's just being a complete see you next Tuesday.
Put simply, a troll is simply a post or article cunningly crafted to get someone, anyone biting and thrashing at the keyboard maniacally. This article and the sarcasm dripping therefrom is a perfect example which, given that this is three or more pages of thrashing, splashing and foaming in, worked magnificently. The keep net¹ must be overflowing.
¹ "Trolling" is actually an angling term. Nothing to do with mythical creatures, billy goats or bridges whatsoever.
¹½ I remain extremely disappointed that nobody has called out <CTRL><Z> as being the background current process key-press rather than the Windozified "undo" with which everyone now associates it.