* Posts by Chris G

2893 posts • joined 18 Oct 2007

Careful with the 'virtual hugs' says new FreeBSD Code of Conduct

Chris G
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Re: It's not rocket surgery

Try living in Spain where most greetings with the opposite sex and sometimes with the same sex involves a kiss in each cheek. Or Russia where greetings with women are a kiss/hug and men a handshake/hug.

These things are very much cultural and the people who try to direct PC behaviour only see things from a narrow perspective.

I think a lot of the offense takers need to get out more, if they are nervous about it, I'll give them a hug.

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Chris G
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Re: Offensive

How dare you!

I never take offense, that's preposterous!

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Gemini is shipping and we've got one. This is what it's like

Chris G
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I just want one!

I had a couple of Psions back in the day, the 5 I had a couple of weeks then got burgled by some bastard.

I write for a hobby and write notes about everything because my memory is rubbish, I have tried countless apps for writing and note taking but at the end of the day, half your screen is virtual keyboard and the other half is small script that makes my head ache. I have a Tab 4 which I like typing on but it doesn't fit in a jacket pocket, so, clamshell with real qwerty keyboard, I want.

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Japan's Robo-Bartenders point to a golden future

Chris G
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Pint

Re: Bah!

Great comment! Have a beer ( although it does look a bit weak)

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UK.gov's Brexiteers warned not to push for divergence on data protection laws

Chris G
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Re: "seek a bespoke arrangement..the UK’s exceptionally high standards of data protection,”"

Damn! I had just copied that sentence and then saw your comment. Have one on me!

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Opportunity knocked? Rover survives Martian winter, may not survive budget cuts

Chris G
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Re: Fly me to the moon

That was dumb;

Forgot to include forget in the sentence ; I sincerely hope they don't FORGET to............

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Chris G
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Re: Fly me to the moon

Sounds like a job for the BFR (Big Fecking Rocket) to deliver another BFR (Big Fecking Robot) to the moon.

When they finally build a Moonbase, I sincerely hope they don't to include a barber so that the girl with the sideburns can have a shave.

There were plans to bring Moonbase Alpha back as Space 2099, dunno what happened to that.

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Facebook's big solution to combating election ad fraud: Snail mail

Chris G
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Re: 'The identity theft detailed in the indictment'

What do you think the Voice of America and Radio Free Europe have been doing since the war?

I'm sure they wouldn't stoop to broadcasting anything that might attempt to influence the elections or people of a sovereign country.

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Facebook told to stop stalking Belgians or face fines of €250k – a day

Chris G
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Re: Send Facebook data-pervs / tech-sociopaths a message

@Mark 65

Facebook would be Big Brother's idea of a wet dream, you don't need to monitor the population, they TELL you everything, pics included.

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Chris G
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Re: Send Facebook data-pervs / tech-sociopaths a message

I'm still inclined to think that the Zuck is just a very well paid NSA agent.

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UK.gov calls on the Big Man – GOD – to boost rural broadband

Chris G
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Re: I may be missing something

Allowing for you probably being a townie and not knowing much about that big green place called 'the country' , most churches are in villages, the villages nowadays are populated by green welly wearing city types who want trees outside and a nice view.

Usually if a church is on it's own surrounded by fields is't not a church but likely an old abbey.

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UK.gov: Psst. Belgium. Buy these Typhoon fighter jets from us, will you?

Chris G
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@Ledswinger.

I have reluctantly come to quite like the Mini Cooper but as you say the Countryman is a tad Panzerish. One could easily manage a minigun turret on top and be put to use annexing the neighbours veggy patches and calling it a 'Mini' is oxymoronic.

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HomePod, you say? Sex sex sex, that's all you think about

Chris G
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@ Doc Syntax, In Spain, the moment you show signs of a cold or flu everyone is telling you to get some antibiotics.

Even worse, because they don't have self certification, they all go to the doctor who then idiotically gives them the aforesaid noneffective antibiotics.

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BOFH: Turn your server rack hotspot to a server rack notspot

Chris G
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Daves

Every sales force has at least one Dave and some have Daves all the way down but what's amazing is that they are often selling rubbish to a never ending supply of new punters for decades without being sussed and going broke.

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Iran: We have defeated evil nuclear-sensing Western lizards!

Chris G
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Re: "But when we arrested them, they said they had come for fishing and were tourists."

They had actual fishing rods and fish.

Problem was the fish were still in their tins.

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Essex black hat behind Cryptex and reFUD gets two years behind bars

Chris G
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Why the sobs?

A white collar crime with a two year sentence is probably going to mean an open prison where he will meet dodgy doctors, dentists, accountants and other low risk inmates,he will most likely have sports facilities (I worked at Channings Wood in Devon in the '70s , it had a tennis court and bakery that supplied local shops) and days out. The people he will meet will be able to round off his education so that when he leaves he will be able to add a lot of other white collar skills to his dodgy resume.

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Mars is red, Earth is blue. Here's a space laser story for you

Chris G
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After millenia of hibernation, the last Martian awakes. He heads for the surface wondering if anything survived the disaster that stripped most of the atmosphere.

Nearing the surface he senses an object in near space so he hurries to the surface, he sees an alien machine and thiinks ' there must be intelligent life out here'.....ZZZAPP!!!

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UK Home Sec Amber Rudd unveils extremism blocking tool

Chris G
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Curious

As to why, with the much vaunted abilities that GCHQ is supposed to have, she hasn't announced the software having been developed by them.

Perhaps they have already told her to piss off because it is unlikely to work.

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Chris G
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Re: 99.995% is impossible

@Prst.V.Jeltz. My thinking exactly.

A minister wouldn't lie would they?

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Yorkshire cops have begun using on-the-spot fingerprint scanners

Chris G
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Get a hobby

Preferably one that requires the use of lashings of superglue, its really difficult to avoid getting it on your fingers.

Everyone should have a hobby like that.

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Wow, MIND-BLOWING: Florida Man gets an earful from 'exploding Apple AirPod' bud

Chris G
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"lithium batteries occasionally exloede "

Never mind sticking one in your ear, there are other intracorporeal devices that should also avoid lithium batteries.

BZZZTT BANG!

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Remember the Yorkie pizza horror? Here's who won our exclusive Reg merch...

Chris G
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Re: truly a north-south thing?

@ disgustedetc, We used to have chips and bits in South London when I was a kid in the '50s and '60s, and still going last time I was in the UK.

I was always under the impression that gravy on chips was a Brummy thing as I was offered it every time we went into a chippy in the midlands when I was working installing hyper market refrigeration systems in the late '70s, my mate thought putiing gravy on chips should carry the death sentence.

On the whole it wasn't too bad when the gravy was in a polystyrene cup so that you could dunk the chips if you wished (same with curry sauce but only from a Chinese chippy).

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BOFH: We want you to know you have our full support

Chris G
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Re: This isn't even comedy any more

The majority of customer support systems work this way, keep you going in ever decreasing circles until you disappear up your own jacksie.

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It's been 50 years since those damn dirty apes took the planet by storm

Chris G
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Re: Who doesn't like a talking monkey?

I'm not too sure I'm a poitical nut, I despise all politicians equally, they are right up there with relgions.

Both are only really interested in owning you.

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Chris G
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Who doesn't like a talking monkey?

Hmm that explains the orange hair then, Orangutan!

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Why aren't you being arbiters of truth? MPs scream at Facebook, YouTube, Twitter

Chris G
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Wailing mob

Judging by the reporting of what the MPs were saying, am I right i thinking this junket was sponsored by the Diddly Wail?

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US Senate mulls giving Huawei and ZTE the Kaspersky treatment

Chris G
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Isolation

That is the direction these idiots are dragging the US into. Maybe they should stop pussying around and ban anything Chinese. Electronics, food, a good proportion of scientists working in US research.....

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A tiny Ohio village turned itself into a $3m speed-cam trap. Now it has to pay back the fines

Chris G
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Work it off

The Town Council and cops are there for the benefit of the community, therefore if they don't have the money to pay back the fines, they should spend their free time working for the people they are paying back. It would be a great example of serving the community ( not sure how longer for to pay off 3milion though) the

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Uber saddles up for a new cycle of controversy

Chris G
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Re: AB

AC That was kind of the idea. You mat not be paying attention.

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Chris G
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AB

For Autonomous Bike. All they need is a homing app or something to guide them to the nearest charging station, you could even make them hailable by phone.

They might need stabilisers though or a self righting mechanism.

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Windows Defender will strap pushy scareware to its ass-kicker machine

Chris G
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Re: Facebook/ESET

Fartbook should automatically qualify as malware wherever it has a presence on a page including any page or site with an FB like symbol.

I don't suppose there is an app that will disable that funtion on any page to screw the tracking of those who are not engaged with FB?

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Crim-checker IT system update fail has cost UK taxpayer 'MEEELLIONS'

Chris G
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@iron, It may be that Tata are still transitioning from Crapita, the only thing that comes out of them fast , is ex employees.

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Bring the people 'beautiful' electric car charging points, calls former transport minister

Chris G
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Re: New dystopian car paradigm...

Your New Dystopia looks as though it may have a use for the new Chinese passenger drones, summon one by phone and it can 'drop' you off wherever you want. They could use an Oystercard system, which has already been pointed out to Parliament as a way of tracking the public.

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Chris G
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@wolftone, I see one of them downvoted you.

Tetchy little buggers ain't they?

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The Zuck promises to give you more local news – and so save the world

Chris G
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Zucker

Good point from Kieron noting that Fbook produces nothing but will happily zuck up everyone else's content and then make money from having stolen other people's work.

History's biggest parasite.

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F-35 flight tests are being delayed by onboard software snafus

Chris G
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IE 11

Ha ha ha ha hhhaaa! See title.

What's next, sitreps on Fartbook?

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Tsk-tsk, fat cat Softcat: Milk-slurping reseller taken to court

Chris G
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When I were a lad in sarf London, people who didn't pay their bills would lack toes free.

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Ever wondered why tech products fail so frequently? No, me neither

Chris G
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Re: UAT Testing

@ Terry 6

Bosch (and Philips and others) design what they want you to have, not so that you can have what you want. They have what I now call Windows syndrome; they have a commanding position in the marketplace, think they know better thanmere customers so make and sell stuff that often not totally fit for purpose. They will also brook no criticism, I know I've tried writing to them, you don't get any kind of meaningful reply.

On the shoe front, Redwings in the US make outstanding shoes and boots, not cheap but keep going for years and made to be repairable.

I have a mate who is a cowboy and works in Texas and New Mexico, he swears by them and anything that stands up to working with cows is going to be good. I know you can buy the riggers boots in the UK, don't know about the rest of their line.

'

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RIP Ursula K Le Guin: The wizard of Earthsea

Chris G
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Yet another great literist gone. She was one of the Worlds best writers who helped to change the way we think, her effect on the World went way beyond Science fantasy.

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Aut-doh!-pilot: Driver jams 65mph Tesla Model S under fire truck, walks away from crash

Chris G
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Re: 2018: "But it was on Autopilot!"

"did he/she open the bottle"

'He' had the teeth for bottle opening but lacked the oppsablethumbs to grip the bottle.

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Chris G
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Re: of course you could

Considering the car has a whopping great battery, maybe wiring the seat with an ' attention getter' could be an idea. A few milliamps at a lot of volts should get the driver's attention.

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Chris G
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Re: 2018: "But it was on Autopilot!"

1888: "Consarn it, Sheriff, I'm drunk but the horse is sober!"

Interestingly, in the UK at least, you can be charged with being ' Drunk in charge of livestock'.

A horse riding acquaintance was back in the '90s one Christmas eve lunchtime she was relying on the horse to get her back to the stables after a bit of a session in the local.

My wife at that time owned a horse that was partial to bottled lager, he could drink it out of the bottle.

I have no idea if there are laws about being in charge of drunken livestock.

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PACK YOUR BAGS! Two Trappist-1 planets have watery oceans, most likely to be inhabitable

Chris G
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Re: Food chain

More likely anything large and interesting will be hunted to extinction, if it is sentient, then they will govern it to extinction.

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Facebook open-sources object detection work: Watch out, Google CAPTCHA

Chris G
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2 pints of creme de menthe

That should fool them, after drinking that much creme de menthe my image is always blurry in the mirror so they will never reconise me.

As an alternative for the RoTM I am building a room with a large copper coil around it attached to a dustbin sized capacitor not quite the Matrix but it should EMP the hell out of them when they come to get me.

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29 MEEELLION iPhone Xs flogged... only to be end-of-life'd by summer?

Chris G
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Never mind Apple

Perhaps a better selling phone is just around the corner.

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UK competition watchdog: Fox's takeover of Sky 'not in public interest'

Chris G
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These things

Often go through eventually after various promises regarding the running of the new joint venture, the whereabouts of a new offshore bank account and the location of a vacant villa in the sun. Oh and future boardroom appointments.

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Baywatch hero drone saves silly struggling swimmers Down Under from going down under

Chris G
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Re: Just say no ;)

I think you forgot the Troll icon.

FYI 3/4 of the world's mega cities are coastal.

I'm a sea kayaker, I know the coast and currents where I paddle, if I go anywhere new I ask locals. I'm also English, the sea is part of my heritage, if you are not trolling then you are wet even without going into the sea.

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Internet giants removing 70 per cent of reported hate speech, crows European Commission

Chris G
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Re: Hate speech is...

Education is the answer to hate speech of all types, racist, homophobic, misogynistic, etc.

The problem lies with where does education begin and finish and at what point could it be condsidered propagandising the 'student'?

Passing laws against hate are almost laughable and only truly enforceable with real thought police.

My worry with the current support for censorship is that it is the thin end of a potentially very thick wedge.

Common sense seems to be fading away in the world .

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Why did I buy a gadget I know I'll never use?

Chris G
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Re: Sprouts - the Devil's vegetable

I think the tiny demons are the evil farts that sprouts engender.

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Chris G
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Re: Bags full of the stuff

Stud detector and damp detector! Do you buy them in adult shops?

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