* Posts by Andrew Moore

1648 posts • joined 2 Mar 2007

All good, leave it with you...? Chap is roped into tech support role for clueless customer

Andrew Moore Silver badge

Re: "This will only take a second..."

"I've never used Windows 10, it's completely different and I don't know what to do."

I’m happy to find out I’m not the only person to do this.

OK, team, we've got the big demo tomorrow and we're feeling confident. Let's reboot the servers

Andrew Moore Silver badge

Re: Another Robin in the 'Hood

One of the products I look after has a perpetual license on it. Which has to be renewed every year.

Crash, bang, wallop: What a power-down. But what hit the kill switch?

Andrew Moore Silver badge

Sounds familiar...

Was in a client's comms room with my boss, sometime during the 80s. Suddenly the power goes dead and we all turn round and there's my boss at the kill switch. His response was along the lines of "What? I just wanted to know what it did." Needless to say, he was barred from the comms room and that ban still exists today.

Hold horror stories: Chief, we've got a f*cking idiot on line 1. Oh, you heard all that

Andrew Moore Silver badge

"2) Why is your support phone line so poor they can't even answer a phone, which is their one, primary and sole purpose?"

Have you considered that some numpty with a 100-link SIP trunk might be tying up all their phones?

Andrew Moore Silver badge

Re: Oooops, dropped

Something similar- we got our phone system upgraded and I didn't realise the new system auto answered internal intercom calls. So my boss got to hear me say "Now what does he f*cking want?"

Cop films chap on body-worn cam because he 'complains about cops a lot'. Chap complains

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Re: I'm actually half on the officer's side here

It's an officers job to enforce the law, not interpret it.

Andrew Moore Silver badge

Re: How covert was it?

A number of these cameras (and dashcams; and bike cameras) have a "Covert" or "Do Not Disturb" mode which switches the LED off.

Andrew Moore Silver badge

Re: No wonder

My mother's house was broken into and when she reported it to the police they basically said "You have insurance don't you? Why are you bothering us?"

Fujitsu pitched stalker-y AI that can read your social media posts as solution to Irish border, apparently

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Re: WTF?

Apparently it breaks "Data Protection" rules, but when you press them on which DP rules exactly it breaks, they go very quiet.

I won't bother hunting and reporting more Sony zero-days, because all I'd get is a lousy t-shirt

Andrew Moore Silver badge

Re: Sony - Never buy

My boss got a Sony Vaio many years ago, and the motherboard blew on it. Thankfully it was within the warranty period. The downside was the boss had been storing all his photographs on it, in a non-backed up area. Next problem- the hard drive was not accessible without dismantling the machine (first for me). I rang Sony support (after paying for the privilege) to be told by a passive aggressive little shit, that I was to backup any data before returning it to them as the drive would be blanked; and that opening the machine to get at the drive would void the warranty. I kept pointing out that the motherboard was fried, but he just kept repeating about backing up and voiding the warranty.

In the end the boss decided that the photographs were more important. And he also issued a decree that the company was not to buy any more Sony products.

Facebook didn't care if your kids ran up gigantic credit card bills – lawsuit

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Re: Is there a scammier corporation

I'm currently checking out Line and I'll be transferring my family to it.

Hubble 'scope camera breaks down amid US govt shutdown, forcing boffins to fix it for free

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Re: Shutdown

Sorry, I was trying to think of the other American corporations that pull the same practice. Thanks for the clarification.

Andrew Moore Silver badge

Re: Shutdown

I'm thinking that aren't the likes of Walmart, Costco et al reliant on the government giving their employees food stamps because they don't pay them a living wage? In that case, the large corporations will be affected.

Amazon Mime: We train (badly) an AI love bot using divorce bombshell Bezos' alleged sexts to his new girlfriend

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Calling Mrs Merton...

"So.. Lauren, what first attracted you to the multi-billionaire Jeff Bezos?"

My 2019 resolution? Not to buy any of THIS rubbish

Andrew Moore Silver badge

Re: It's an age thing...

I enjoyed it. Though I would like to point out that "hotshot" Spectrum game programmers didn't use Sinclair BASIC- we were using Z80 machine code.

Until now, if Canadian Uber drivers wanted to battle the tech giant, they had to do it in the Netherlands – for real

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Re: If it weren't so crappy it'd be funny...

Worse is- Uber gets defended by people whose only desire is to have low cost taxi fares- they couldn't care less about poverty or working conditions, as long as they get their "cheap".

Error pop-up? Don't worry, let's just get this migration done... BTW it's my day off tomorrow

Andrew Moore Silver badge

And the opposite...

Just finishing work for the week/year here and I have just been told of a major server upgrade that needs to be done* and if that was "something you can do during your Christmas Holidays"

* I can guarantee you that manglement have known about this for months but have only dropped it into my lap today.

London's Gatwick airport suspends all flights after 'multiple' reports of drones

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Re: The internet

Yes but that would be illegal as the operator has to have eyes on the drone at all times while in flight.

Andrew Moore Silver badge

Re: Christmas conspiracy

This is the current thought in the office (we fly drones and do drone training). Either that, or there has been some system failure in Gatwick and they are using "drones" to cover it up.

Brexit-dodging SCISYS Brits find Galileo joy in Dublin

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Re: I don't understand...

I mean't when they told us that businesses would not move out of the UK because of Brexit...

Andrew Moore Silver badge

I don't understand...

The Brexiteers swore that this kind of thing wouldn't happen...

Oh Deer! Poacher sentenced to 12 months of regular Bambi screenings in the cooler

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Re: 'Murica never ceases...

Everyone does have a firearm and criminals are not afraid to use them to commit crime.

Or, by any chance, when you say "everyone" are you including toddlers?

Time for a cracker joke: What's got one ball and buttons in the wrong place?

Andrew Moore Silver badge

Re: Embarrasing

We have one of those: He once started a meeting by declaring "I don't know anything about IT but if I want something done, I want it done now!" I pointed out that the first half of his declaration negated the second half.

Small American town rejects Comcast – while ISP reps take issue with your El Reg vultures

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Re: Good for Charlemont!

Agreed- good for them. But I would be extremely wary of sabotage; Comcast are not going to want this project to run smoothly.

LG's beer-making bot singlehandedly sucks all fun, boffinry from home brewing

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In fairness...

...there's 6-7 of these type of devices already on the market. In fact one, (Brewbot) has already gone bust.

GOPwned: Republicans fall victim to email hack

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No mention of Rudy Giuliani's twitter "hack" (according to him)- he left a typo (left out a space after a full stop) which turned the typo into a link which directed people to an appropriate message: https://twitter.com/RudyGiuliani/status/1068570837459050496

Support whizz 'fixes' screeching laptop with a single click... by closing 'malware-y' browser tab

Andrew Moore Silver badge

At this point you hand the user an Etch-A-Sketch and tell them that they will not be getting another laptop until they have completed retraining.

Palliative care for Windows 10 Mobile like a Crimean field hospital, but with even less effort

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Steve Litchfield??? There's a name I haven't heard since my Psion CIX days...

Techie was bigged up by boss… only to cause mass Microsoft Exchange outage

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Re: Reminds me of something I heard a long time ago...

Never finish anything too quickly- it gives management unrealistic expectations...

Scanning an Exchange server for a virus that spreads via email? What could go wrong?

Andrew Moore Silver badge

Re: Sweet memories...

I had a journalist approach me in 1998 looking for scary Y2K story- I told her that nothing was going to happen because we'd been on top of it for a number of years now and everything should be in place by then. Needless to say, she completely ignored me and found a nutjob that gave the doomsday scenario that she was looking for.

'Desperate' North Korea turns to bank hacking sprees to rake in much-needed dosh

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Re: So how?

Also, a lot of the hacking is done by the agents in the field, rather than in North Korea.

Convenient switch hides an inconvenient truth

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Sounds familiar...

I just love electricians/telecom's engineers who just arbitrarily decide to take a connection- Our company monitors a number of remote GNSS stations around the country- all on their own dedicated phone lines. The number of times we've lost those lines because someone has decided to use it for their own monitoring (usual an alarm company) even though testing the line would have shown that it was busy.

How an over-zealous yank took down the trading floor of a US bank

Andrew Moore Silver badge

Re: Unplugging the keyboard = kernel panic ?

That could have been fixed in the OS at a later stage.

Big Cable tells US government: Now's not the time to talk about internet speeds – just give us the money

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Re: Ajit Pai

Or "Eejit Pai" in gaelic...

You know all those movies you bought from Apple? Um, well, think different: You didn't

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Re: not yours

"Having a legitimate disk copy of a given movie would seem to be a pretty good license to freely download a working copy from the Internet..."

I said as much to an entertainment industry lawyer once and he couldn't give me any legal reason to why I was wrong.

Andrew Moore Silver badge

Re: Do the right thing

As the old anti-piracy advert said "You wouldn't steal a car..." Well neither would I buy a car and expect to find it missing one morning.

'World's favorite airline' favorite among hackers: British Airways site, app hacked for two weeks

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380,000, when adjusted for PR arse-covering, is 3,800,000 in reality...

Brit teen pleads guilty to Minecraft-linked bomb and airline hoaxes

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I keep forwarding articles like this to my daughters who still believe its possible to be anonymous online.

I've seen the future of consumer AI, and it doesn't have one

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Last year with was all IoT. My boss got an "Smart" Kettle that he can switch on remotely. The one thing it can't do is tell him whether there's any water in it or not. Which I thought would have been a basic requirement.

Andrew Moore Silver badge

Re: An "AI powered cooking assistant"?

I've got a Meater bluetooth probe- it monitors the internal temperature of whatever I stick it into, while it cooks and I can view that data on an app.

Go Pester someone else: TSB ditches CEO over bank's IT meltdown

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Re: still expected to take away about £1.7m

It's "Reward For Failure". Worse thing is, another company will probably employ him to do exactly the same thing...

Fast food, slow user – techie tears hair out over crashed drive-thru till

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Re: Ahhh, memories...

Thankfully, I've been out of front-line customer support for many years now. :) I have a team doing that for me (and I'm careful not to pass on any of my bad habits).

Andrew Moore Silver badge

Re: Ahhh, memories...

This was back in the day when the company I worked for suddenly found itself giving free support to a competitor- they'd sell kit, usually by undercutting us, and then hand out our phone number when their customers came looking for technical support- so costing us money. In the end, if I found out that the kit was bought from the competition, I'd just tell the customer that it was faulty and to take it back to where they bought it and get a replacement. This forced the competitor into having to do technical support themselves.

Andrew Moore Silver badge

Ahhh, memories...

Many's the time I've managed to get an nuisance caller (I mean "user") off the line by getting them to unwittingly unplug their phone. I also had a trick where if I worked out that they were on a mobile, I'd just tap the mute on/off repeatedly so they'd think they had bad reception.

AI sucks at stopping online trolls spewing toxic comments

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It seems like only yesterday when AI used to be called "apps". And a long time before that, just "programs"/"software"...

UK getting ready to go it alone on Galileo

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Re: UK has the resources

That's what I was thinking- replicate QZSS. However because it's for military applications they would probably need global rather than regional coverage.

Andrew Moore Silver badge

doubt it, as they are likely to be sharing the same frequencies...

Techie's test lab lands him in hot water with top tech news site

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Re: @Zippy

Okay for clearance, Clarence...

Boss regrets pointing finger at chilled out techie who finished upgrade early

Andrew Moore Silver badge


Just back from holiday- before I went away, I put in an order for some critical infrastructure; I'd done everything, identified kit, found supplier, got quotes, pro formas, everything. All Accounting had to do was arrange a bank transfer to pay for it and the jobs done. I get back from holiday and everyone's running around like headless chickens. Our client is up in arms because the equipment we are meant to install this week hasn't even arrived. So, because I was away, the blame got landed in my lap in-abscentia. Until I provided the paper trail, and a statement from the supplier, all pointing the fingers at the Accounts Dept not paying for the order yet.

Now I need another holiday...

Sysadmin trained his offshore replacements, sat back, watched ex-employer's world burn

Andrew Moore Silver badge

Kinda similar...

The company I work for lost a lucrative service contract. No handover (fortunately), and then I heard most of the techs quit from the company that won the contract because they could wrap their heads around the system within the time-frame required. So the other company then tried to hire us to do the work. Queue much laughter.

We got the service contract back a year later.

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