* Posts by Sam Therapy

348 posts • joined 9 Oct 2007

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Twitter breaks bad news to 677,775 twits: You were duped by Russia

Sam Therapy

Fake news! No Russian interference in US elections! Sad!

Just making a prediction.

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9

Take a bow, TalkTalk, Post Office, Vodafone! You win most-whinged-about telcos award

Sam Therapy
Mushroom

I'm an ex TalkTalk customer and in the time I was with them, I had nothing but problems, almost from the start. Numerous router failures, poor connection, no connection, missed appointments, conflicting/contradictory advice, idiotic call agents...

Just about anything that needed me to call them turned into an hours long marathon because the polystyrene brained goon at the other end couldn't understand the problem and/or didn't relay the info to someone who could.

They are, beyond all doubt, the absolute worst ISP I have ever had the misfortune to deal with. Never, ever again.

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M&S extends customer support contract with, er, Capita

Sam Therapy

Oh no. I have an admittedly personal stake in that scenario, being a former employee, along with Mrs Therapy.

Mrs Therapy, btw, successfully sued Crapita for wrongful dismissal. She signed a NDA, but I didn't. I was her rep throughout the proceedings, too. :)

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Sam Therapy

This is not just Crapita... This is M&S Crapita.

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Swiss cheesed off after Apple store iPhone does Samsung Galaxy Note 7 impersonation

Sam Therapy

Re: Slightly sarcastic response coming up...

Yup. Whirlpool tumble dryers, for example.

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Carphone Warehouse cops £400k fine after hack exposed 3 MEEELLION folks’ data

Sam Therapy

Currently owned by Dixons. What a surprise.

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The healing hands of customer support get an acronym: Do YOU have 'tallah-toe-big'?

Sam Therapy

Not Niven, Heinlein.

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Sam Therapy

Argh!! My eyes! You utter bastard!

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Sam Therapy

Re: Opposite effect

An ex GF made watches - any watches - run backwards.

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Sam Therapy
Happy

SICK

In my time as IT Support guy for British Coal (yep, that long ago), the most common fault was

Staples In Computer Keyboard

usually solved by turning the thing upside down and giving it a whack on the desk.

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Wait! Before you fire up that HP lappy, check the battery

Sam Therapy
Coat

"Hard disks roasting on an open fire..."

Coat... getting...

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Captain Morgan told off for Snapchat lens: That grog be aimed at kiddies

Sam Therapy

Re: Generation Y

... jumpers for goalposts...

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Time's up: Grace period for Germany's internet hate speech law ends

Sam Therapy

Re: C'mon Reg...

The Nazis (the real German ones, that is) were pretty enthusiastic about shutting up people, as were the US government during the McCarthy era.

Hardly lefties, by any stretch of the imagination.

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NAO probing Capita's sickly £700m GP support gig

Sam Therapy
Alert

Capita?!

Oh fuck me, we're all doomed. Doomed, I tell ye!

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O Christmas wreath, O Christmas wreath, thy potent skunk's in bunches

Sam Therapy

Re: Not funny in the slightest

Very, very good. Have an upvote for Patrick Bateman content.

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Sam Therapy
Thumb Up

Re: The sooner

Even though I don't indulge it's about damn time it was legalized.

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Sam Therapy

Re: Dickens' story

Dickens' or Dickens's are acceptable but the former is the modern, preferred usage in the UK.

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TalkTalk banbans TeamTeamviewerviewer againagain

Sam Therapy
Mushroom

TalkTalk...

I've been stuck with that bunch of polystyrene brained goons for a few years (not through choice) but finally we have FTTP in our area. From personal experience, I can state they are far worse - and their staff more clueless - than you could possibly imagine.

Friday's the day my new connection goes live. Fuck you very much TalkTalk.

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Oh, the weather outside is frightful, but the data centre temp's delightful

Sam Therapy

Reminds me of the old story of the prat who stacked up a, er, stack of Marshall amps. The bottom one drew in cool air and vented out warm air. The second drew in warm air and vented hot, the third drew in hot air and vented scorching air, and the last one, well, it kind of burst into flames.

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Irony's lost on old Pope Francis: Pontiff decrees fake news a 'serious sin'

Sam Therapy
Angel

Ah, irony. Nice one, Your Popeness.

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UK good for superfast broadband, crap for FTTP – Ofcom

Sam Therapy
Happy

This Friday, I'll be one of the 3%

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

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Telly boffin Professor Heinz Wolff has died

Sam Therapy
Pint

RIP

Great fun to watch, extrememly funny guy.

Rest now, your work is done.

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5 reasons why America's Ctrl-Z on net neutrality rules is a GOOD thing

Sam Therapy
Holmes

I think we can go with the sarcasm thing. You did notice this is El Reg, right?

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Sam Therapy
Angel

Re: Richard 81,

Hitler was a snowflake!

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Sam Therapy

Re: Socket Protectors

Same place as "Reverse back", "PIN Number" and "Round circle", the Tautology Fairy.

It is what it is.

I'll get me outer garment coat.

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Sam Therapy

Re: Socket Protectors

Correct. Their use is banned in all NHS Premises. And yet, building inspectors will give a warning to any NHS premises that don't use them, so they put them in until someone complains about it, or points out they're unsafe, so they take them out. Then the building inspectors come in and...

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Meet the woman with a supernatural affinity for stiff lovers

Sam Therapy
Happy

Alice Cooper - Cold Ethyl.

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Accused hacker Lauri Love's extradition appeal begins

Sam Therapy

Re: I am an Aspie. I don't hack stuff and then cry like a baby.

Problematic, that. My son has what was described as "High Functioning Autism", which is probably going to be Asperger's but at his age it's too early to tell. He - sort of - knows right from wrong but often fails at understanding the consequences of his actions. We tread a very fine line between instruction and punishment, in order to prepare him for later in life.

The real problem is, how can anyone return an objective understanding of someone's, erm, understanding of what they are doing, if it's known and documented they have some fundamental problem with consequences? Everyone with an ASD is different and the way you see the world is different from the way someone else with Asperger's sees it. Then, there's also the - at least to an outsider - seeming attitude of the US system which makes no allowances for mitigation and insists that anyone, including those with mental and/or behavioural "issues" (I hate that word but can't think of a better one right now) should be punished no matter what.

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Clone poster girl Dolly the sheep's arthritis was 'normal for her age'

Sam Therapy

Re: Really?

I'm sure people are cueing up to respong.

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TalkTalk sees red after chucking £75m on restructuring bonfire

Sam Therapy
Mushroom

Re: TalkTalk is actually quite good

No they ain't. not even nearly. For them, mediocrity is an impossible goal.

For a variety of reasons, I'm stuck with these idiots for now and they really are the most useless shower of bastards outside the current Conservative front bench.

Almost every single employee I've had the misfortune to deal with appears to be a weapons grade idiot. I say "almost" because, just the odd few times, I've spoken to someone who has a more than room temp IQ and appears to give a shite.

Roll on the day I can ditch these useless fucksticks.

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Irish priests told to stop bashing bishops

Sam Therapy
Windows

Gobshite!

3
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Parity calamity! Wallet code bug destroys $280m in Ethereum

Sam Therapy

Re: This is when I know I'm getting old...

Something makes you think they aren't already?

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Why are we disappointed with the best streaming media box on the market?

Sam Therapy
Headmaster

"It's only real competitor is Apple TV ..."

"Its " not "It's". Fucking hell!

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Forget the 'simulated universe', say boffins, no simulator could hit the required scale

Sam Therapy
Headmaster

Re: "To model just a few hundred electrons needs a computer bigger than the universe"

Yep, there is. Read up on the Oxford comma:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Serial_comma

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What's that, Equifax? Most people expect to be notified of a breach within hours?

Sam Therapy
Happy

Or rather, A shade differential comparison scenario.

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Sam Therapy
Mushroom

This bunch of useless fucksticks need to be nailed to doors, left on a beach and run over with flail tanks. At the very least.

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Equifax mega-leak: Security wonks smack firm over breach notification plan

Sam Therapy
Happy

Article picture

Why is Steve Buscemi taking a pair of grips to his phone?

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Samsung heir does not pass Go, does not collect $200

Sam Therapy
FAIL

Not having a great time lately, are they? Phucked phones, trashed tellies and chairman in chokey.

Oh dear

How sad

Never mind.

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Hackers can turn web-connected car washes into horrible death traps

Sam Therapy
Alert

True story...

Going through a car wash a few weeks ago, I said to Mrs Therapy, "I bet some genius decides to connect these things to the net and does shag all about security".

We made it through in one piece, though. Probably give 'em a wide berth from now on.

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Cassini captures pieces of Saturn’s rings

Sam Therapy
Thumb Up

Re: precise measurement of the length of the Saturnian day continues to elude us

There are things, up with, I will not put.

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Currys PC World rapped after Knowhow Cloud ad ruled to be 'misleading'

Sam Therapy

Shower of lying bastards and it's not the first time they've been slapped for making false claims.

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Adobe will kill Flash by 2020: No more updates, support, tears, pain...

Sam Therapy
Mushroom

Bastarding Flash and that chuffing Real Player. I hates em both, me.

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Radiohead hides ZX Spectrum proggie in OK Computer re-release

Sam Therapy

Re: Only a British would use a ZX spectrum for music...

The Thompson Twins singer was from Sheffield. So, at least part Brit.

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UK government's war on e-cigs is over

Sam Therapy

Re: Jesus, NO!

I have COPD and asthma and I vape with no adverse effects.

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Everything you need to know about the Petya, er, NotPetya nasty trashing PCs worldwide

Sam Therapy

"The superficial resemblance to Petya is only skin deep,"

Tautology... it is what it is.

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PC rebooted every time user flushed the toilet

Sam Therapy

Here's one

Way back, I had an Amiga 1200 with an intermittently fautly mouse. I couldn't work out what caused it to stop working, the switches weren't the silly silver plated ones, the ball (remember those) was clean, as were the rollers.

I began to notice the thing stopped working always at a certain time of day and gradually realized the problem was caused by sunlight shining through a nearby window into a gap in the mouse casing. This was sending one of the internal sensors daft. Solution: A piece of paper taped over the gap.

I could have pulled down the blind but I liked the view over Rivelin Valley from my window.

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IT firms guilty of blasting customers with soul-numbing canned music

Sam Therapy

Worst I ever heard...

Was a badly edited (so it didn't repeat correctly) loop of an Enya track. For hours. I didn't like Enya before but now whenever I hear her "music" I get a red mist in front of my eyes.

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Man sues date for cinema texting fiasco, demands $17.31

Sam Therapy

“This is like one of my biggest pet peeves,”

Misuses "like". Sues date.

Twat.

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Forgetful ZX Spectrum reboot firm loses control of its web domains

Sam Therapy
Facepalm

R:Tape loading error

Oh dearie bloody fuck.

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Lyrebird steals your voice to make you say things you didn't – and we hate this future

Sam Therapy

Trusting fools

This could get interesting very quickly.

People will tend to trust something they have been told is genuine, even when it's demonstrably compromised, or been shown to be total bollocks. So called Lie Detectors, for example, have no scientific validity, yet many people still think they work.

At the very least, (Insert politician/public figure of your choice here) can always claim they never said such a thing and that it was created by this simulator. It's been - in theory - possible to put together fake speeches by using tape editing and sampling but this tech makes it much more convenient.

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