Posts by TeeCee

What's actually happening...

...is that Bezos is turning up to serve a "cease and desist" over the use of the word "Prime" in Boris' job title.

I'm sure that all works a treat when you're trying to log into a machine to find out why it can't get a network connection.

They have thought of that.......right.....?

Sesame Street.

Todays programme is brought to you by a letter that we cannot mention for legal reasons and a number that we cannot mention for legal reasons.

Ah, corporate knee-jerk reactionism 101.

Caught with your fingers in the till by the eco-nazis? Do something meaningless, but unpopular, that allows you to play the ecofiddle card

"...37 per cent efficiency..."

Yippee! Just what we need, a new way to waste shitloads of power. But it's convenient, so we'll probably do it anyway.

I wonder what "maximum efficiency" actually was...?

Now I understand...

... what's meant when someone says; "it all went sideways".

The next message?

As it's HPE, that'll be; "Here's your invoice for consultancy, customization and installation services - ${eye_watering_sum}".

..chemical energy equivalent of a big pile of batteries.

These days that's known as a "Tesla".

Seriously?

The nation also aspires to become a hub for the automotive industry.

Well they're going the wrong way about it. Not too long ago, anyone buying parts used to run a mile at the sight of anything stamped as made in China. These days, every home mechanic knows that the truly godawful shit all comes from India.

One specialist I know is having suspension parts made to pattern in China themselves, purely because the official aftermarket parts production has moved to India and the failure rate of those is catastrophic.

KABOOM!

Many of us are old enough to remember the transition from coal gas to natural gas. One of the big issues was that coal gas can be smelled when it leaks, while natural gas is odourless. The solution adopted (and in place to this day) as to add smelly stuff to natural gas. This is what you notice when there's a gas leak and it's smelly enough that you notice it at gas concentrations way below explosive.

Hydrogen isn't even a molecule, there are no smelly molecules that'll do any more than settle out of it.

Couple that with the fact that Hydrogen is the very devil to get to stay inside anything (let alone underground pipework - that's just sheer insanity) and the Kaboom is a "when, not if" issue.

Oddly..

fuck.shit.bollocks.arse is right out in the Atlantic, on the very edge of territorial waters.

I'm not sure what that means, if anything.

Smoking gun.

"email was meant to be channelled through a filtering company and not directly exposed."

Aha. I'll bet that proved tricky to get to work properly as, as is usual in such cases, getting the filtering company to pony up with exactly what needs to be allowed where is like getting blood from a stone. They'll have a document that says to do XYZ which you have dutifully implemented, but it still doesn't work.

The problem will turn out to be (as in you can safely bet your mortgage) that they haven't updated their customer config document for 18 months, or "a hardware refresh cycle and umpty-something software changes" as that's better known as.

So, stick in any / any to get things running with removing same, once you've got to speak to someone at the third-party who can discuss technical detail without drooling, on the "to do" list. Roll on a bit, the "to do" list and the "too hard" pile merge and we are where we are.

How much work can you do with eight Arm Cortex-A57 cores?

In Russia, you do work for cores!

All your tower are belong to us.

Ok, who was it...

...who nicked the bribe out of the document bundle before it got to the court?

Yes, but...

One thing that's been shown repeatedly when moving government departments out to the sticks.

While it may indeed save money, everyone who's not utterly shit and can thus easily get another job convenient to where they are, tells 'em to shove their relocation where the sun shineth. The invariable result is a much cheaper department now staffed solely by time-serving losers, many of whom are then promoted using the Peter Principle to fill the gaps in the organisation.

They then proceed to backfill using local hire and find out the hard way why the office space was so cheap...

Hmm.

53% of how many.....?

He may well be comparing half a dozen apples with a bulk freighter of pears here.

...send $1,000 to a Bitcoin address with the promise that the account holder would send twice as much back.

Maybe the Banking industry should give him an award for showing them where they have customers who are way too bloody stupid to be allowed to have their own bank accounts?

As scams go, that one's not even trying to look believable.

Root cause.

One might be driven to ask WTF it was doing in a bloody browser in the first place!

Oh yes: "Oooo. Lusers lurve this tool. I know, we'll build it into our browser and they'll use that rather than XYZ browser, 'cos they're lazy bastards who hate using the right tool for the job if it takes an extra two seconds.".

See also: Adjustable spanner / swiss army knife.

References: Bloatware. Attack surface.

"talent Hoover."

How apt, given that everything we hear from inside Amazon would suggest that working there really sucks.

Cyanogen Mod?

Cobblers, cobblers and thrice cobblers.

OnePlus originally used Cyanogen OS, Cyanogen's commercial offering based on the hobbyist Mod. Unfortunately, Cyanogen then came over all venally stupid and did an exclusive deal with some Indian mob. OnePlus were forced to change or face being shut out of the Indian market.

OnePlus had the last laugh when Cyanogen went comprehensively titsup.com when their Indian connection proved to be rather less lucrative than they'd been led to believe.

"The purpose of agile development is not to overtake a corner."

No, it's to sprint around it and faceplant a lamppost.

Er, hang on.

...aims to implement multiple technical specifications that change how online advertising works in the browser.

So the world's largest advertising broker is changing the way advertising works, without telling anyone else in the business what they'll need to work with in the future?

I predict the great-grandmother of all arse-reamings from the competition authorities.

That process in full:

1) Code tight, lean app.

2) Hand to Google.

3) Magic Googly encruftulation.

4) APK of massive bloatware.

5) End user buys new phone with more memory / processor / storage.

"...the first trapped-ion space clock..."

Ahem. Let me fix that:

...the first trapped-ion clock IN SPAAAAAAAAACE.