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All your ETL pipeline are belong to us: Google snaps up Alooma
Ministry of Defence's new payroll contract is, surprise, surprise, MIA: Missing In Action
Cut open a tauntaun, this JEDI is frozen! US court halts lawsuit over biggest military cloud deal since the Death Star
New claim dogs Oracle: After $11m of sales, I was unfairly axed before next big deal – because I am a 64yo woman
WWW = Woeful, er, winternet wendering? CERN browser rebuilt after 30 years barely recognizes modern web
CAST links arms with Software Heritage to tease out your open-source ancestry
Splunk does a bunk from Russia: No software and services for you, Putin!
Down productivity tools: Microsoft Teams takes a Monday tumble
Password managers may leave your online crown jewels 'exposed in RAM' to malware – but hey, they're still better than the alternative
Unearthed emails could be smoking gun in epic GDPR battle against Google, adtech giants
Accused hacker Lauri Love loses legal bid to reclaim seized IT gear
Revealed: Numbers show extent of security fears about security biz Kaspersky Lab
Git money, git paid: GitHub waves larger wads of dollar bills to tempt bug hunters
Uptown func: Serverless types Nuweba trouser $4.8m as investors eye faster FaaS
Want to learn how to accelerate your software ops AND save big?
Squarespace's Tanya Reilly to deliver keynote at Continuous Lifecycle London
Policy
The Channel
What has an 'open-door policy' with industry and puts the X into NHS? Brits, let app-happy Matt Hancock tell you
Autonomy trial: Key HPE witness might not testify, UK High Court told
Guess who's working on a health data-slurping digital tool? Bzzt! Nope, it's the UK Department for Work and Pensions
Court sees Morissette Meter flip out as Oracle assumes anti-arbitration stance in pay dispute
U wot, m8? OMG SMS is back from dead
AGM X3: Swoon at this rugged interloper mobe then throw it on the floor to impress your mates
Turn on, tune in, drop out: Apple's whizz-bang T2 security chips hit a bum note for Mac audio
LG folds at prospect of launching bendy phone while Samsung flaunts its upcoming kit on telly
Geek's Guide
How do you solve a problem like Galileo? With a strap-on L-band payload, of course!
Oldest white dwarf star catches amateur's eye – and its dusty ring leaves boffins baffled
Visited the Grand Canyon since 2000? You'll have great photos – and maybe a teensy bit of unwanted radiation
Surrey Uni mans the space harpoons, and NASA buys more seats on Russian rockets
Artificial Intelligence
Internet of Things
Want to create fake web profile pics? This creepy AI tool makes them on demand. Plus predictive policing, and more
Bloke thrown in the cooler for eight years after 3D-printing gun to dodge weapon ban
Blockchain is bullsh!t, prove me wrong meets 'chain gang fans at tech confab
Boss of venerable sect with millions of devoted followers meets boss of venerable sect with... yeah, you get the idea
Verity Stob
'Occult' text from
Buffy The Vampire Slayer
ep actually just story about new bus lane in Dublin
You know the drill: SAP has asked Joe Public to name Munich arena so go forth and be very silly
Twilight of the sundials: Archaic timepiece dying out and millennials are to blame, reckons boffin
Sussex rap fan wants statue of Easy-E from NWA in his hometown because he's a 'legend'
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The Register
builds glorious Project Alias gizmo to deafen Alexa
Down productivity tools: Microsoft Teams takes a Monday tumble
Windows Subsystem for Linux adds pop to release, SAC-T sacked, crypto-jacking apps: It's Microsoft's week
Australian prime minister blames 'state level' baddies for Oz parliament breach
Accused hacker Lauri Love loses legal bid to reclaim seized IT gear
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