Re: "but here in the Unix world we like simplicity"
Here's an oldie but goodie on systemd. Someone else shared this in a forum, and got excoriated for its age. And replied with "and in all this time, not one issue it raises - and no one disagrees with those - has been fixed". Good read, on a par with "PHP, a fractal of bad design".
I haven't seen a perl me-too language yet that's as good, sorry.
Pretty definitive description of truly fundamental design flaws in systemd - ones that amount to cheats to make life easier for the writer temporarily by breaking all the rules in a power grab. Just read it.