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You've never met a real dead-ender, have you?

Never met one? I've been one! I've lived on the streets with my only roof being the clouds (or stars) above. I've wandered Wellington streets at night hoping to find something to eat that doesn't come from a rubbish can. I did complete school but that is my highest on-paper qualification (well, I've held HT licenses and forklift certificates etc)

Church? I grew up gay in a conservative rural community. I'm sure that pastors gave sermons on how I was beaten up at school many times, even one of the teachers gleefully joining in - and how just and righteous they were for doing this. When I did join a church, and became part of the crew, I lost my position when it was found out I was not straight. 3 churches moved me on in time, even though I never acted gay or obviously took a boyfriend or did anything else different. In the end I tried many before finding one pastor who, when I told him, his response was "So? That's between you and God". Then I found a home for a while.

I've been abused, I've been jobless and homeless. I've not known if I'd be digging through rubbish or going hungry, even been turned away from food banks because I didn't have a place to call home. But I got above that with the right tools, and I've helped many more. Again, my faith has done a lot to help there. Ok, my faith is actually responsible for all the good and some of the bad in my life. I'm actually pretty selfish, disgusting and useless left to my own - as you've no doubt seen :)

One of "my boys" now owns his own company and is really doing well in work and family life. When I met him 20 years ago he was 14, school drop out and only just managing to not get into drugs even though he hung with the worst crowd. Parent's couldn't do much, many problems of their own. I got him back into learning (a special course not based on school yet able to get the same NCEA qualifications), talked one of my contacts into giving him a chance which he later blew BUT we got him on his feet, and the next job he excelled at. Another of my 'boys' (although he's older than me) was a special needs case that now has a good job in Sydney, and owns his own home. Not much you can do with someone with a low IQ and no real capacity to learn, right? All you can do is give up on them and claim other's have no experience. Except.. Others go in when you give up and do the job you say cannot be done.

(One also will be in prison for some years to come - that damage was done before I learned how deep the rot was there, and if only I'd opened my eyes a little wider :( )

There are very few true "no hopers" in this world. I've not met one. I've met people who have been beyond what others can or are willing to do. I've helped many and have been through it myself. Sure, I only spent a little while homeless and utterly broke, but it opens ones eyes. You should try it one day. Seriously, try getting a little dirty for once and working with others. You'll have to change your tune of course, but hey - stranger things have happened.

It may take effort, it does take wisdom - what worked with Peter today will only offend Gerald tomorrow - but it can be done if you take the time and effort to actually care about people. That's what makes the difference. Sure, some try to abuse you and take advantage, but they learn if you're willing to teach - hard as it may be. Even you aren't beyond help, although I sometimes wonder :)