Re: Which is worse?
I's say that harassment (as distinct from, say, actual assault) is continuing to do something which offends someone after they've asked you to stop. Just flashing a lighter like that is juvenile, and the person's manager should probably have asked them to wise up & leave it at home. If a female staffer has complained, and they continue to display it, I'd certainly define that as harassment, although admittedly of a fairly low severity.
Biting the hand that feeds IT
