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Office 2019 lumbers to the stage once more as Microsoft promises future releases

onefang Silver badge

"WTF do we need AI in a word processor, or spreadsheet, or slide deck?"

AI in a word processor to write your documents for you. So that instead of using the same template over and over again to tell people your web site has just been breached and all their credit card details are now on the dark web, everyone gets a deeply personalized letter that is full of the sorts of information Microsoft has been slurping from your PC for the last couple of years.

Dear Jim,

Last week, while you where visiting your sick grandmother in hospital, our web site suffered a rather unfortunate incident, rather like when your under age daughter Jenny accidentally sent that sext to Robert (your priest) instead of Bobby (her boyfriend). As a result, your credit card details have been exposed, and that lengthy list of items you recently purchased from BDSMtoys'R'us has been published publicly on our FaceBook feed.

P.S. Your gramma is fine, and will be released tomorrow, but her dog has fleas, caught them from the mutt next door. Probably a good idea to leave your own dog at home next time you visit her.

P.P.S. Robert has promised to not send that photo to any more of his friends. Microsoft have assured us that they will delete it from his OneDrive account, for a small fee. We pointed Microsoft at the copy of your credit card details available on the dark web, just in case they didn't already have their own copy.

Have a nice day Jim, and don't forget your anniversary next week, like you did last year.

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