Re: It would take a heart of stone not to laugh...
1) We can't let people get away with skipping bail. Providing him safe passage tells every criminal "just run to an embassy if you don't want to go to jail". And he wasn't even GOING to jail...
2) Nobody cares about the Sweden stuff unless and until he's out and Sweden bother to re-file paperwork for it. That'll be AFTER he stood in a UK court and (almost certainly) has gone to prison for contempt of court. Then we literally hand him over, because we're legally obliged to if they file the right paperwork again.
3) He's not really costing us anything (any more), but it's costing the Ecuadorians a fortune in lawyers alone, I imagine.
4) He's a great leverage in trade agreements. "Oh, so I see Mr Assange is still there, running from our legal system. And you... wanted what from us precisely?" <notes down scribble on a post-it> "Well, I'll be sure to look *right* into that."
Fact is, nobody wants him, but nobody wants him to thumb his nose at them either. It's only a matter of time / stupid tweets before Ecuador tire of him and come up with some innocent arrangement which happens to end with his arrest. Then we'll convict him, shut him up for six months, and let him go. Who to and where? Literally nobody cares. If the paperwork comes through and it's legit, we honour it. If it doesn't - well that will just be funny, to be honest.
In fact the best thing for him would be to try to escape, because at least something interesting would happen. And barely a week goes by that he doesn't try to make the news anyway. One slow news week and he'll be hopping down the fire escape or something.
The alternative? I can literally see him dying of old age in the embassy, because nobody else cares enough to do anything about it. He'll be one of those QI factettes ten years afterwards, and nobody will care.
Best Alan Davies impression: "So, this guy spent 20 years locked in an embassy, to avoid bail on an arrest that never happened... what a twat..."