Had your fun? One of the most inaccurate articles ever in The Reg
If the writer had actually bothered to listen to Apple's earnings call, or read one of the few accurate stories online reporting it, he would have noted that the 2018Q1 to 2017Q1 comparison was 13 weeks compared with 14 weeks. Comparing like numbers of weeks (an "apples to apples" comparison? Sorry, had to), gives these sales figures:
iPhones up by 6%
iPads up by 8%
Macs up by 2%
Services (e.g. Music) up by 27%
And revenues up by 21%.
Think those results might have something to do with the 3.1% overnight rise in share prices? (To be fair, they're back down 2.81& so far today, with all US shares down 1 - 1.5% so far on the day.)
But that wouldn't make a good "Failing Apple" or "Peak Apple" story, would it? You'll just have to settle for "dumb but rich Apple fanbois." What else could possibly explain people all over the world buying more expensive bling than you prefer?