Re: "A third country might offer a new couch"
But he'd still have to get from couch A to couch B, meaning he could be nabbed en route.
Perhaps the offer was more literal. His current couch must be pretty worn out and stinky by now so maybe the Ecuadorian embassy is crowdfunding a replacement having spunked their own housekeeping budget on tissues and air fresheners.
Ambassador thinks: 'if only' ------------->