Reply to post: Re: No opinion on the headsets

Apple's 'shoddy' Beats headphones get slammed in lawsuit


Re: No opinion on the headsets

What the fuck could the headphones have done so badly that caused $5 million in damages?

That's easy. The breakdown is:

$200 refund because the product wasn't as advertised - $1,000 total as 5 claimants

$10,000 dollars each for the inconvenience of having to attend court, buy new headphones, etc. - $50,000 total

$800 each for the time explaining why they no longer use the headphones - i.e. they are stained with bodily fluids and the battery needs recharged after 4.3 seconds of use* - $4,000 total

$9,000 each - pay for the iPhone XI next year when it is launched, and headphones that are compatible with the faster than light connector that replaces the lightning connector - $45,000

$980,000 to help with treatment for PTSD caused by being seen with such crap Fanbois 'Fones'. - $4,900,000 total

What they should get is electroshock treatment for being mad to buy the headphones in the first place.

*Running time will vary depending on amount of use and how recharges were applied, including duration, initial charge level.....

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