>I wouldn't wipe my arse with The Register either. Too sharp, might get an electrical shock.
Not to mention gorilla glass, just smears everywhere and creates a terrible mess.
Warning ! Don't try this with anything smaller than a 10 inch tablet as you could end up with an embarrassing trip to casualty, doubly embarrassing if you forgot to put your phone on silent and didn't turn off vibrate.
On a side note I'd like to complain about the waiting times in UK A&E departments, I've been stood here for five hours as sitting down is too uncomfortable on those cheap hard plastic chairs, it's a disgrace.