BOFH fan-fic?
Who shall accept the challenge?
Yeah, my schtick is to tell customers that technology fears me, as it is often the case the problem clears up within moments of placing the call to me. I explain that once the misbehaving piece of kit heard I was getting involved it knew time had come to straighten up and fly right. Much like how hearing "just you wait until I tell your father" could elicit angelic behavior in many demon children... myself included.