Reply to post: @gazthejourno - Re: So where is the post to balance this out?

@gazthejourno - Re: So where is the post to balance this out?

"battered partner etc."

Spot on!

Likening our relationship with the EU to an abusive domestic relationship will likely seen distasteful or hyperbolic to some, but it is actually incredibly accurate.

As well as the classic threats of retribution if one party leaves, there is:

- consistently undermining of confidence, repeatedly asserting the party who doesn't want to leave can't possibly cope or survive outside of the relationship.

- controlling every little aspect of the one party's life. Victims get "vetos" and "opt-outs" at first, total control is rarely taken straight away. It's done over time, little by little.

- the promise of change and reform if one stays, or the suggestion that there is a likelihood for change in that event. "if I stay, they will change"/"i can only change then if I stay" - said every victim and survivor everywhere ever. Only most of us have been fortunate to be able to get out before things got really ugly, and didn't take 40-odd years to do so.

- coercion of one party into doing something they don't want to do, ignoring "No", and badgering to get their way. Like completely disregarding member state's democratic processes and ignoring referendum results, or implementing things behind the scenes regardless, or reholding referendums until they give the right result.

- gaslighting and manipulation when one party realises what's happening, or starts to question what's going on. When the proof is in the mirror, or in our case, on Europa.

- isolating one party from their friends and family so they become dependent on the other.

- a slow erosion of one party's capabilities and means to be independent should the need arises, because the other party provides and does everything. We don't have experienced trade negotiators because the EU does it for us.

There are more, but these really jumped out at me over the last month or so of seeing Remain's excuses that are straight from the Battered Spouse's script, of reading the discussions in the commons on Hansard, of reading info on Europa, and mulling over my own experiences of such a relationship.