If I could get an actual phone line it would be a good start. The USO for voice telephony used to involve everyone paying £200 to get a line in.
Nowadays, BT want nearly £30,000 to install one in the Cairngorms National Park. The so called USO only applies to the first £8,000 of the install cost.
I'll quite happily take a 10mbit data only line instead. But the "USO" will doubtless be so BT and its pals can cherry pick what and where "Universal Service" applies.