Re: Could we fucking kill it already?
It's already happening: LibreSSL.
LibreSSL was not "written from scratch". And it has problems of its own, including bugs (e.g. CVE-2015-5333), lack of FIPS 140 validation (which makes it useless for businesses that have to sell to the US Federal government), somewhat complicated licensing, and source code that suffers from the disease known as KNF.
OpenSSL remains by far the most complete open-source SSL/TLS implementation available. Many people can get by with an alternative; others cannot. These calls to "just replace OpenSSL" are ignorant grandstanding.