I'm with you. When the kids were small we had the Citroen Berlingo.
Just totally functional.
The very anthesis of a boy racer's car.
But it could get two kids, baby cot, dog, suitcases and all the other stuff you need as a parent down to the seaside. It had lots of places to plug gadgets in, seatback trays for colouring books, snacks, etc.
Storage spaces anywhere you could possibly imagine ( and a few you wouldn't).
The rear seats could be stripped out in minutes to turn it into the van it really was - perfect for when the kids need a new bedroom suite from the local DIY store.
But it wouldn't impress a Clarkson.