back to article NY bomb scare bank worker 'evacuates self'

A New York bank worker has admitted she "evacuated herself" as a precautionary measure during a bomb scare, the Wall Street Journal reports. The alert began when a 6-inch by 3-inch white envelope turned up in the mailroom of Bank Hapoalim, near Rockefeller Center. Suspiciously, it was encased in bubblewrap, addressed to …

COMMENTS

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  1. Tom 38
    Joke

    "Evacuated herself"

    I thought you meant something completely different by this. Especially "with the quotes".

    1. Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

      Re: "Evacuated herself"

      Hurrah, you got it! You win some pants.

  2. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Would it help?

    Is evacuating yourself a wise thing to do if you suspect a bomb. Might work in a hostage situation but I'm not sure you would be any better off in the event of a bomb.

    1. chr0m4t1c

      Never mind the titles...

      I think that depends on where you are in relation to the bomb and where you evacuate to in relation to the bomb.

      If you're near the bomb and you move to somewhere well outside of the blast radius where you are unlikely to be hit by any debris, then that's probably sensible.

      Of course, these choices become much more complicated if your exit route takes you closer to the bomb and/or you are somewhere that is outside of the blast, but may be catastrophically damaged (e.g. the upper floors of a building) .

  3. Steve Button Silver badge
    IT Angle

    Same mistake on the wire season 5.

    ... where hundreds of people where evacuated.

    The season was mostly about pedantic journalists.

  4. GrumpyJoe
    WTF?

    The double entendre

    is confusing me - did she defecate in her trousers or not?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Headmaster

      Simple.

      She pegged it instead of fudging her duds.

  5. Anonymous Coward
    Dead Vulture

    Slow News Day?

    OK, I know it's in Bootnotes, but this really is just a waste of space.

    1. Levente Szileszky

      It's not Bootnotes...

      ...today it's Boobnotes as far as I can tell.

  6. Graham Bartlett
    Happy

    @GrumpyJoe

    It's not a double-entendre if the risque sense is true. Might still be funny though.

  7. Anonymous Coward
    FAIL

    What?

    What's the story here? Or is it just a poor excuse for a toilet-related double-entendre? Come on The Reg - must do better.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      RE: What?

      Sigh..... You just don't get it.

    2. The Mighty Biff
      Go

      What what ?

      This is srs news ! Srs !

    3. Disco-Legend-Zeke

      At Our* House...

      ...we call these "sixth grade jokes" and moan as if it were a pun.

      Sadly, this has become much too commonplace on network television, i guess this phenominum is now trickling** into the more important media.

      Luckily for us, this is the exception for El Reg, which we depend on for bent todgers and other reproductive humor. We call this "9th grade jokes."

      Let us hope that Sarah and company do not follow television into "Social Security humor" such as "At my age I'm afraid to fart."

      *the banks seems to disagree on this.

      **not sure if it is trickling down or up.

  8. Evil Auditor Silver badge
    Thumb Up

    Darn

    I nearly evacuated myself thanks to suppressing laughter after reading this! (And yes, I briefly had to leave the office too to get a cuppa and calm down)

  9. pj3090

    The most puzzling kind of language barrier

    It's called "English" in both places, and it has the same words, but the vocabulary is completely different. I was doing some research on some unpleasant surgery that, um, er, a friend of mine was about to have and I found a UK-based web site that discussed possible side effects. Before that, I would have guessed that the phrase "there may be wind and unexpected movement in the back passage" referred to a treacherous mountain-climbing expedition...

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      It's not puzzling

      Let's face it, 'merkin English and Blighty English are two different languages. Just like both Dutch and English are West Germanic yet they are different languages. The advantage is, having the same root it is quite easy to learn e.g. English or German if you speak Dutch. So maybe one should attend some language course before dealing with people from over the pond? Or, hell, let's reclaim the colonies and impose a proper language over there!

      (it's Friday, no need to be serious)

  10. disgruntled yank

    Ah, New York

    Where the headhunters have graduated from blowpipes to pipe bombs.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Thumb Up

      Of course

      If applied correctly, it kills and cleans your target in one step. Just pick-up the head and go!

  11. Anonymous Coward
    Joke

    You traitors!

    Ohmygod, you've done it again, haven't you?

    You just can't stop yourselves giving lessons to terrorists. Now they all know not to use bubblewrap.

    WE'RE ALL GONNA GET BLOWN TO SMITHEREENS AND IT'S YOUR FAULT!!!!

    (Sorry, just got a bit nostalgic for letters pages as they were during the height of the War on Tuhrrrrrrrrrrr.)

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Not only that

      They also know to put a return address on the outside of the envelope. That, clearly, will fool security.

  12. Daniel B.
    Happy

    Ah yes.

    This would be the reason why I have an "EVACUATION ROUTE" sign pointing to the bathroom. It's the age-old joke, especially because "Ruta de Evacuacion" (Evacuation Route) is the mandated signage for er... escape routes.

    It also doesn't help that the bathroom in my office is at the stairs, so every "Evacuation route" sign also points to the bathroom!

  13. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    What makes me want to evacuate

    ... is the thought that people who get obscene bonuses for taking risks with other people's savings are sufficiently pea-brained to change jobs because of a musical greetings card.

  14. Telecide
    FAIL

    >sigh<

    So the whole angle of the story is based around the woman saying how she 'evacuated herself'. Is that it? While this might make it as a scene in the new Carry On Banking film, this is otherwise the bit of cyberspace which it occupies. Sorry, El Reg, 2/10.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      You need to keep in mind

      ... that The Reg is only a training school for Daily Telegraph reporters, and that Lester is only an eleventh-year student.

      http://www.theregister.co.uk/2011/01/14/chris_bye/

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