back to article All hail Barbie Stalker Girl!

I am the father of four daughters, aged 23-10, and have learnt a thing or two over the years about Barbie dolls. The most salient thing is the "generational split" within my family - the two older girls owned Barbies and played with Barbies - the two younger junked the hand-me downs and never played with dolls. Of any kind. Ever …

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  1. Tom 15

    Call girl

    They're also doing one with a phone called Barbie Call Girl

  2. Ryan Clark

    Younger girls

    My 6 year old has Barbies, some hand me down, but people have bought her new ones too. She plays with dolls. I think she prefers watching the Barbie movies though which seem to be on Nick jr constantly.

  3. Liam Johnson

    Barbie Videos Girl?

    I think you mean Teletubbie Barbie.

  4. LuMan
    Joke

    Billiards Girl

    They could call it Barbie Cue...... Then put her on a fire!

    1. Andrew Newstead

      Ah!

      Found a witch.....

  5. TeeCee Gold badge
    Coat

    Drug-addict doll.

    Barbieturate Girl.....

  6. This post has been deleted by its author

  7. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Surely any parent

    with children young enough to be playing with Barbie who lets their vulnerable offspring post videos of themselves on YouTube without at the very least checking the video first does not deserve to be allowed to keep their children?

    1. ElReg!comments!Pierre

      My thought exactly

      WTF? "Boycott this doll as your 5-yo kids might use it to post video on the web during one of their unsupervised browsing session"?

      Surely if that's a real risk the doll is the least of your problems.

  8. IR

    Yes!

    A tv on a woman's back, why didn't I think of that?!

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Pint

      And maybe a beer...

      ...holder on her head?

  9. Anonymous Coward
    FAIL

    Should have been the Six Million Dollar Man

    Imagine a Steve Austin doll ^H^H^H^H action figure with a genuine functioning cybernetic eye, preferably with wireless transmission to the nearest 12" B&W portable telly. And that plastic V8 engine with a big handle on top for no other reason than to demonstrate that things with handles can be picked up.

    1. ian 22
      Terminator

      Brilliant

      Or a Terminator doll with a camera eye- the value added proposition being that the camera will insert meaningless COBOL code scrolling through the video.

  10. ElReg!comments!Pierre

    "'to a PC or a Mac"

    I know this is the luser's way of saying "to Windows or MacOS", but that's "where's the ANY key?" level really. Please don't. And certainly not twice.

    Sorry, pet peeve of mine.

  11. laird cummings
    Black Helicopters

    Slow off the mark

    Only just now twigging to this..? You've had months and months to become aware of Big Brother Barbie... And by now it's too late. Barbie has been scoping you out, and has already uploded a score of videos of your most embarasing moments, from up-nostril shots showing that you ought to pick you nose more often, to actual shots of you excavating said nostrils.

  12. Anonymous Coward
    Paris Hilton

    Stalker? Oh, Stalker...

    Thought you said STARKER Barbie. My mistake.

    USB tramp stamp.

    Wonder how long it'll take for THAT to show on the beaches.

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