back to article Chilean tarantulas menace Bolton

The RSPCA has warned the good burghers of Bolton to keep a sharp eye out for Chilean Rose tarantulas after a couple of the eight-legged critters were spotted in local gardens. The organisation reckons the two may be from a larger batch of arachnid escapees and, if the Telegraph's headline is to be believed, it could be just a …

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  1. Thomas 4
    Boffin

    Sic the adders on them

    I used to be in the boy scouts, so I know what a Chilean Rose tarantula looks like.

    1. Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

      Re: Sic the adders on them

      Heh.

    2. Tigra 07
      WTF?

      Eh?

      Since when do boyscouts learn about foreign spiders?

      I thought you just tied knots, set up tents and helped old women across the road.

      Is there a badge for knowing your spiders?

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Missing the point

        >>>>--------Point------>>

        You

      2. Trevor_Pott Gold badge

        @Tigra 07

        I got a badge for knowing my spiders and snakes. Mind you, that was in Canada. Maybe UK scouting is more lax...

        1. Tigra 07
          Pint

          Impressive Trevor_Pott

          Sounds like a lot ot learn just for one badge.

          WIth our nanny state in the UK we can expect a badge for each type of spider and snake whether we're wrong or right

          You don't get last place here you get drinks all round ;-)

          1. Trevor_Pott Gold badge
            Pint

            @Tigra 07

            The last badge I remember getting involved learning to start a fire with a single match, a series of no less than five twenty-five kilometre hikes, getting a minimum of about 30 other badges that cover a large number of topics, something about survival camping for a weekend, about 250 hours of volunteer work and two recommendations from at leaders of two troupes you weren't part of for exemplary service.

            By the time Post-secondary started to impinge upon my time enough that I couldn't devote the time to scouts, I was working on the next level of that badge which was roughly three times as difficult.

            I don’t ever remember any badges being particularly easy to get. You wanted a badge for identifying spiders and snakes, you better be able to identify every one native to your area, and every known dangerous/poisonous one from all other areas of the world.

            Some people might find it boring…I found it quite fun!

            Drinks alla round just because.

  2. Rumcajz
    Alert

    Untitled

    Articles like this just beg for one of those stupid "I, for one, welcome our new giant hair-spitting Chilean tarantula overlords". I'm just glad I got to read the comments section before some idiot posted one...

    1. Graham Marsden

      Yes...

      ... but only just!

  3. Gaz Jay
    Joke

    I for one...

    I for one welcome our eight legged alien arachnid overlords.

    1. Sarah Bee (Written by Reg staff)

      Re: I for one...

      Sigh. There's always one.

      1. Gaz Jay

        RE: I for one

        Makes it even funnier that it came right after the post from the guy who doesn't like them!

    2. TeeCee Gold badge
      Welcome

      Re: I for one...

      <--- You should probably have put the mat out then.

    3. BossHog
      Thumb Up

      I for one... etc.

      <griffin>There ya go.</griffin>

  4. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Bananas

    I used to live near a big banana distribution centre* and big hairy spiders were not uncommon in the area. Probably still are. They get brought in hiding in the bunches of bananas.

    *That's a big distribution centre for bananas, not a distribution centre for big bananas.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Thumb Up

      Sounds like...

      Sounds like A Harry Belafonte song to me!

  5. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Down

    When did the Torygraph become a tabloid?

    Their headline:

    "Tarantulas on the Loose in Britain"

    Sub-heading:

    "Britain could be facing a tarantula invasion after a number of the spiders were discovered in gardens in some parts of the country, wildlife experts have warned"

    Could they be any more alarmist or vague? In the body of the article they provide no more info than El Reg does so for "a number" read 2 and "some parts of the country" read Greater Manchester.

    A classic case of ill-informed journalism spreading FUD

    1. skeptical i
      Coat

      Just a bit of mygalomania,

      'twill subside.

  6. Scott Mckenzie

    Hmm..

    ... 'spit hairs' that's not quite accurate, they can flick them from their abdomen using their legs - which is handy if you're close, such as something that may want to eat the spider, but they aren't going to sail through 5 feet of open air into the eyes like a Spitting Cobra.

    But hey, media sensationalism is always fun.... any spare ones found, give us a call, ours just died :(

    1. frank ly

      @ Scott Mckenzie re. Hmm

      "... 'spit hairs' that's not quite accurate, they can flick them from their abdomen using their legs"

      You're just splitting hairs.

    2. Sooty

      After

      googling the things, I have a funny feeling that if i found one of these in my garden, I wouldn't be getting close enough to worry about whether it's going to either spit, or flick, hairs at me.

  7. envmod

    SPOIDER

    SPOIDER

  8. Annwyn

    "they can't survive in the wild for long with the UK climate"

    Umm, no real danger of a sustained mass invasion then...

    Besides, people keep these types of spiders as pets! As Scott has pointed out already.

    I'd be more worried about the Redback invasion at Warton - at least those things can kill you (if you're unlucky)

  9. max allan
    Alert

    Arachnaphobe...

    Speaking as someone who is quite arachnaphobic, the "can't survive in the UK climate" causes me concern as we seem to be having rather a nice spell of warm weather.

    I, for one, fear our new hair spitting arachnid overlords and will not be found anywhere near Manchester till they're gone.

    N.B. For other arachnaphobes who managed to read this far, "Raid Ant and crawling insect" spray is quite effective against the 8 legged menaces.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Grenade

      You need an excuse not to go near Manchester ?

      really ?

      1. Tigra 07

        Re: You need an excuse not to go to Manchester...

        Shameless put me off Manchester, so frankly the spiders are just icing on the cake

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Eh?

          Bolton isn't part of Manchester. Not unless it's moved a few miles to the south east since I worked there.

        2. BossHog

          Mmmm....

          Spider cake.

    2. TeeCee Gold badge
      Coat

      Re: Arachnaphobe...

      I've never understood arachnaphobia.

      Yes, spiders have lots of eyes and legs, but they're 'armless..........

  10. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    These things freak me out

    So would a 20 MT thermonuclear explosion centred on Oldhams Estate in Sharples be considered an over-reaction?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      No

      Nuke the site from orbit. It's the only way to be sure.

      (Who'll miss it anyway?)

    2. Thomas 4

      Over-reaction? No.

      Civic improvement? Yes.

    3. Bucky 2
      Pint

      8-Legged Death

      It might not be an over-reaction, but it WILL make the spiders grow to the size of a school bus and web the town to the ground (giant spiders always web the town to the ground).

  11. CarlMc

    I feel sorry for the spider

    Oldhams Estate is rough as owt, it'd need eyes in the back of it's head to avoid being mugged.

  12. Dan 10
    Coat

    That's a hot date!

    "Hampson took the second beast - a female - to Bugworld in Liverpool."

    Does that count as a day out, or a visit to a restaurant?

  13. Gill Bates
    Joke

    bloody foreign spiders..

    ..coming over here, taking white British spiders' webs, getting Bugworld benefits as soon as they arrive, bringing dozens of their family over no doubt. what we're seeing here is the steady arachnification of Britain. in 20 years time we'll all be under spidia law

    this would never have happened under the BNP. arachnimmigration. open your ocelli.

  14. ROG
    Joke

    Think with your big head...

    "open your ocelli"

    ocellus: literally "little eye"

    Is that on yer little head?

  15. Anonymous Coward
    Coffee/keyboard

    @ the other AC

    "*That's a big distribution centre for bananas, not a distribution centre for big bananas."

    PMSL...

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