back to article Hitachi hides Magic Wand vibrator under a bushel

There's one HItachi product you won't see at the company's uValue 2010 convention in Tokyo, the Magic Wand vibrator. Visitors will be told about the huge breadth of Hitachi's product range, running from nuclear power stations through the bullet train to supercomputers, servers, storage arrays and even nappy sensors, but not …

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  1. Robert Ramsay
    Joke

    Wait...

    ....you mean it isn't that new control device for the PS3?

    1. Captain Save-a-ho
      Coat

      But can it play Crysis?

      Thank you much. Now about me coat...

  2. Anonymous Coward
    Paris Hilton

    "....you can buy one on Amazon for $32.55."

    Seems they are only available on Amazon.com - anyone know about their availability in the UK? :) I know a complication is they need a transformer for 220V... Somehow I doubt one will be able to buy the Wand here for their equivalent price in pounds...

    Paris, who else?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      I have seen one in the UK

      But I don't remember if it had a transformer, I didn't look under the bed to see where it was plugged in.

      They're quite industrial looking. If you tied a piece of emery cloth round the head, you could probably use it for cleaning car bodywork back to bare metal.

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Reminds me of "Top Secret"...

      ...where they get use a mains powered US vibrator in Europe without a transformer......leading to the great line "It took us two hours to wipe the smile off his face"!

    3. Michael 28
      Unhappy

      Argos...

      ....sell a similar one. I bought one for that purpose, until my Mum borrowed it last time she visited.

  3. hplasm
    Coat

    Hitachi!!

    Have you heard the buzz!!?

    ,</failed advert competion entry>

  4. nigel 15
    Unhappy

    Subtlety

    i would say to the author of this piece that sometimes less is more.

    the line 'but not about a product which really hits the spot, the G-spot.' would have been so much better with out the explanation on the end.

    we all got it.

    1. Eddie Edwards
      Happy

      Er

      Well in fact this thing looks too large to comfortably get in there to where the G spot is purported to be. I suspect the spot this hits is the front-mounted button above the, er, input port.

      1. Graham Marsden

        To hit the g-spot...

        .. you can buy an attachment which fits over the vibrating head which has a soft plastic "extension" allow for for penetration and g-spot stimulation.

        And really they're not that noisy, they're only loud in comparison to some other vibrators.

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re : To hit the g-spot

          One practitioner is worth a thousand theorists

        2. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          So informative

          I can't wait for the 'Which?' report on this.

          It'll probably get better reception than the iPhone as well.

  5. Bonce

    So you're saying

    That during product development, nobody saw this coming!?

    Don't believe it for a moment.

  6. Anonymous Coward
    Unhappy

    Well I do hope.....

    ....that A Evans ensures that the vibrator head has been thoroughly washed between use on feet and re-use in the "bedroom", otherwise the transfer of fungal spores could lead to unpleasantness.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Coat

      Unneccesary titular bollocks >:(

      Athlete's fud?

  7. Yorkshirepudding
    Paris Hilton

    Pics or it didnt happen!

    as above

    paris because she loves wand

  8. Terry 8
    IT Angle

    Where's the IT angle?

    "Just the thing for sysadmins with backache".

    Boom.

  9. Paul Crawford Silver badge
    Unhappy

    Not in UK

    Seems the UK's legions of tired and stressed female sys admins are being denied the rejuvenating joys of Hitachi's magic wand. Poor show UK amazon!

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      get it from

      Get it from j-list...

      Ahhh, lol, these things have a lot of custom mods from what I've seen... browsing lamtarra... no no no the bit at the front of the shop... no not the bit at the back... or the other two floors... why would I go there? What's back there anyway? I wouldn't know...

      Funny thing coming back from Japan, the border guard said "You do know it's illegal to bring back obscene content." First thing he said upon hearing that I'd come back from Japan. Lucky these guys don't know about the internets. I do like the joined up thinking "Young, came back from japan, DIRTY PERVERT!" a lot like the "coloured, came from abroad, DIRTY IMMIGRANT!"

  10. Sordid Details
    WTF?

    LOL

    "We were told about the Magic Wand by an embarrassed Hitachi executive who hinted that Hitachi was somewhat ashamed of the product and didn't want to publicise it."

    And front page on El Reg is...what, exactly?

  11. Anonymous Coward
    FAIL

    That's nothing...

    I used to go out with a girl that favoured a mains-powered electric tooth brush. I just couldn't compete

  12. Anonymous Coward
    Happy

    Nothing new

    To my knowledge Hitatchi have been making "ladies entertainment devices" for years. I remember flicking through some Cosmo article in the mid 90s and seeing reviews of said gadgets, with Hitatchi at the top of the list.

  13. Amazon Wageslave
    Pirate

    not the g spot

    If you're using the magic wand for g spot stimulation... you're doing it wrong.

    Jolly Roger, because that's what you can have when using it properly.

    1. Arclight

      Look harder

      There are plenty of, erm, attachements available ;)

  14. Anonymous Coward
    Joke

    Officially...

    ...we call it here "HDD testing device no.2" For the record, the rubber mallet is "HDD testing device no.1".

  15. Anonymous Coward
    Happy

    also seen in....

    They're also seen in every bondage flick made in the last few years...apparently because they work.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      this

      this, for sure. I had always wondered what they were. I might try to get one of these... discretely... for the lady-friend visitors.

  16. Anonymous Coward
    Joke

    Chicks have all the fun..

    'nuff said.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Happy

      Not just ladies

      They can also stimulate men quite nicely as well. It's harder work for men, but it can lean to a happy result. BTDT.

      (smiley face, obviously)

  17. HollyX
    Thumb Up

    eBay

    They're as good as their reputation would have you believe and not as noisy as a lawnmower ... and some people sell them on eBay UK ;-)

    Not to be confused with the Purple Wand, which has different uses in the bedroom altogether ...

    1. Graham Marsden

      Purple wand?

      Are you sure you don't mean a Violet Wand? (Or were you merely using a euphemism for the male appendage?)

  18. blackworx
    Badgers

    Reminds me...

    ...of Seiko's "Intimate Area Shaver". It is (so I'm told) a hit with the ladies, but not just for its intended "ladygarden topiary"/"personal thicket control" application.

  19. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Feelings of inadequacy

    "tennis ball-like head"

    <sigh>

  20. Anonymous Coward
    Happy

    If you look on Amazon

    You will see that people who purchased this also purchased the g-Spot accesorie :)

  21. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    hello kitty

    also reminds me of the hello kitty back massager ho ho ho, that was a popular item.

  22. RW
    WTF?

    I'm shocked and horrified

    To discover that LoveHoney, the UK's wonderful sex toy site, (lovehoney.co.uk), doesn't carry the Magic Wand.

    Perhaps this is a commentary on the difference between American passion and British?

    Lovehoney does have, however, a variety of other massagers, some of quite sinister appearance.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Lovehoney used to sell them

      Lovehoney definitely *used* to sell them. That's where my wife got hers, complete with 230v transformer. I did hear recently some rumour that due to them not be CE tested or something they were not legally allowed to sell them in Europe anymore.

      And, yes... they work ;) She describes it as having two speeds 'f%^k off' and 'REALLY f%^k OFF'.

      Poi

  23. asiaseen

    buy one on Amazon for $32.55

    New or used?

  24. Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

    Field of Dreams

    If you build it - they will come ?

    1. Captain Save-a-ho
      Coat

      Ahem...

      Actually, I was going to say that one in the hand is better than two in the bush, but I can't really say if the ladies would agree.

      Mines the one with the peep-hole in the front...

  25. Anonymous Coward
    Happy

    Kirby

    Some years ago, one of my house mates managed to lumbered with a Kirby vacuum cleaner demo.

    After they had finished, he has the demo guy that he'd heard a rumour that there were "sex toy" attachments available for it, which was vehemently denied.

    I often wondered if this was an urban myth or if there was something to it.

    Anyone?

  26. Eduard Coli
    Pint

    Flaming lips

    What, no allusion to The Flaming Lip' W.A.N.D. or to the Dell commercial that uses the same tune and giant robot legs?

  27. Anonymous Coward
    Happy

    A noisy vibrator can be a good thing

    It helps mask the other noises that result from its use.

  28. Mr Bear
    Terminator

    Not available in the UK?

    The word on the street* is that someone got busted by Trading Standards for selling the wands with fine of about £5k each, due to them not being manufactured to British standards as they need a transformer. So it's looking like the only way to get one is to buy from abroad where they don't need a transformer or don't have the same standards or don't care.

    Maybe a protest at this show for 240V wands would help them see the light and continue to help make British women happy. Or at least get them to moan about something else in private.

    *Means it's what I've heard and I have no idea if it's true or not.

  29. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Up

    LOL

    You might think lawnmowers would be noisy when they get near a bush.

    Very good.

  30. Fluffykins Silver badge

    "Heavy, loud and awkward, but gets the job done!"

    I knew a girl like that

  31. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Up

    They come with a transformer

    My mate picked one up mail order from a .us company. They come with a transformer. They're really not /that/ noisy - only compared to other vibrators. They work exceptionally well but, she tells me, the G-spot accessory isn't worth getting. YMMV.

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