back to article Microsoft rejects porn, iPad protesters fake it

Applications for Windows Phone 7 won't contain porn or decapitation - but while the rules may be limiting they are public, unlike Apple's. Microsoft has published complete details of the application submission process for apps developed for Windows Mobile 7 (pdf), and porn is definitely out along with big nasty violence. But …

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  1. P Zero
    Coat

    I see

    So basically, you can get an iphone or Windows phone and be free from porn, or get an Android, and have all the porn you want. Great work guys, mine's the one with sordid pockets.

    1. Chris Pearson
      Go

      not so

      Or just open the browser on any of these phones and go to the sordid website of your choice.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        RE: not so

        Might stuggle to get video on an iphone as it dnt do flash!

    2. DPWDC

      Agreed

      I do wonder what the mentality behind this is - cut off one group of society in the hope that another (MUCH SMALLER) will flock to buy the smut free phone?!

      1. I didn't do IT.
        Pirate

        Re: part of society

        Actually, my guess is that they are trying to get the yoof share of the market. Obviously, the little tykes are too young to move out of mommy's house (or can't afford it out of college), so parents are expected to provide the latest accessories of leisure and status.

        After all, if MS expects them to run the same OS from cradle to grave, they might as well get used to it being everywhere. No smut simply is a selling point for a phone that the buyer doesn't have to use.

  2. Yeah, about that thing?
    WTF?

    No pubes at all?

    Surely that means no underarm hair and possibly even beards? Some countries and demographics will be outta luck then.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Flame

      Target Market

      Word on the street is that religious right conservitives don't like pubes, so no surprise there, really. Provide what the market wants, they say.

      The only reason for indignation is their preference for no razor burn, either...

  3. max allan

    Android for the grown ups.

    So, if you want to be considered a grown up in future, you'll need to be on Android.

    Otherwise all the other kids will laugh at you, letting your parents buy your mobile phone for you.

  4. bobbles31
    Thumb Up

    "Images that are sexually suggestive or provocative"

    To quote Bill Hicks...

    "No artistic merit, causes sexual thoughts. Hmm. . . . Sounds like . . . every commercial on television, doesn't it?"

    Defining porn is definately the millstone around the neck of the puritans.

    1. I didn't do IT.
      Flame

      Re: Millstones

      Actually, nope, not at all. It's YOUR neck the puritans want the millstone around, friend Bobbles31.

      Banning it all, in any form, is thier ultimate goal. How else to shield everyone's all-to-vulnerable-to-temptation soul, eh? We will worry about tightening THAT standard even more when we want to burn the next group of "heretics".

  5. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    So no port of Doom or Quake?

    Google should adopt the marketing tag line "Android. Phones for grown ups." - Personally I have no problem with Microsoft wanting to do their bit to fance off their platform from the adult stuff, but why can't they rely on ratings systems and disclaimers just as video games and adult web sites do? It should be "buyer beware", I don't want a nanny with my phone.

    There is plenty of gore on Nintendo DS, even some scantily clad game characters. Why are phones so special.

  6. mafoo

    violence

    "Decapitation, impaling, blood splatter/blood spurting/blood pooling... Exploding body parts... "

    Thats every good shooter ruled out then. And what about worms!!!

    1. Bob Foster
      Thumb Up

      Stil leaves some scope to annoy them

      Still leaves strangulation, drowning, hanging etc, quick trip to the London Dungeons and we could probably come up with enough ideas to give their legal department a nervous breakdown, or at the very least writers cramp

  7. DZ-Jay

    Developer confidence?

    >> "but what's missing is Apple's catch-all clause which says Cupertino can reject any application without explanation, which should give developers some confidence."

    Right, because we all know that the most important stakeholder is the developer. This opens up the chance of unsuitable or unwanted content squeezing in through a technicality or misrepresentation of the semantics of the policies.

    Screw giving end-users the confidence of what will be available on their devices.

    -dZ.

    1. Lou Gosselin

      @DZ-Jay

      "Screw giving end-users the confidence of what will be available on their devices."

      So you feel that microsoft's explicit developer terms are bad for end users, but you don't have a problem with apple's "we can and will do anything we want, at any time, without good reason" developer terms?

      I'm no microsoft sympathizer, hell they're copying apple's closed garden so that both developers and users loose. However with regards to treating developers as grown ups, I trust that microsoft will do a far better job than apple.

      BTW you never got around to answering what your affiliation is with apple.

      1. Martin Nicholls
        Unhappy

        @Lou

        Doesn't read like that to me.

        "Screw giving end-users the confidence of what will be available on their devices"

        Same can be said for both platforms.

        We're totally missing the point here anyways, the OS developer shouldn't get to decide what you install at any point ever.

        The only time the OS developer should prevent you installing software is in extreme circumstances with malware.

        End of story. You shoudn't even be tied into any kind of application store.

        Anybody ever does any of these things you need to run in the opposite direction very quickly.

        1. Lou Gosselin

          @Martin Nicholls

          I know, but then you've got posters like DZ-Jay arguing that less choice and freedom is beneficial for customers. That's so irrational I have to assume that he's affiliated with apple. Read his posts, you'll see what I mean.

  8. Andy Jones
    Coat

    Missed one

    I've just contacted Microsoft and they inform me that Penguins are also banned. Videos of big fat sweaty chair throwing tossers will be allowed though.

    /Mines the one with the Android phone in the pocket.

  9. Dana W
    Flame

    You can have all the porn you want.

    You can have all the porn you want on your iPhone, Apple just won't put it on there FOR you. I don't know why this concept is difficult to understand. Its not like they have some filter preventing you from doing it yourself, or even downloading and saving any pictures you like, and flipping though them at your leisure.

    Its like being mad because a company that makes DVD players won't pack in half a dozen porno DVDs with each unit. My iPhone didn't come packed with humor videos, and there is no app to keep my phone stocked with them, yet there they are. Am I being censored because I had to do it myself?

    People complaining about this are not being censored, merely lazy. Is instant, on tap porn really all that critical? If you are that desperate, try going offline and meeting actual women, its not that difficult.

    1. Someone Stole My Handle!!!
      Stop

      Hmmm...

      Your analogy isn't quite right. It's more like me buying a Sony DVD player, and Sony saying you can only play DVDs you buy from us, oh and we are going to censor all your DVDs so that they only contains the films that we want you to watch (unless you jailbreak your DVD player).

      Oh and BTW, you can only use your DVD player once you've installed some software on your PC that you probably don't want and would have never installed in the first place.

      And while we are at it, you can only plug it in to the mains if your leccy supplier is Scottish power.

      Thanks, but no thanks.

      1. Gordon 10

        Correction

        The correct analogy would be its like sony not allowing you to watch porn via an on demand service (like some of their tellys or the pana blueray/Freesat boxes). But still allowing you to put in porn BR's.

      2. optimusfisher
        FAIL

        Your DVD player lacks a browser

        If you so need that porn and gore you may feel free on your smartphone to crack open the browser and go to town. WP7 will support flash as well, so no part of the dirty web will be off limits to you. MS is simply laying down the rules for what can be sold in their store. If you really just have to get porn from every possible place my twisted firend then go ahead and enjoy your android device I suppose. Most folks have no need for such apps and will be happier that the app store isn't cluttered up with such garbage.

    2. This post has been deleted by its author

    3. JEDIDIAH
      Linux

      Apple chooses to be the platform tyrant.

      > You can have all the porn you want on your iPhone, Apple just won't put it on there FOR you.

      It will also actively interfere with your ability to put it on there yourself. This issue only comes up because Apple chooses to be a platform tyrant. If they ceased treating their end users like children, the point would be moot.

      It's not laziness to not want to hack a device just so you can use it like an adult.

      Porn is just a distraction. The underlying problem is platform control and censorship. Porn is just Steve's excuse so that he can make the entire situation sound more palatable.

      It's the kind of approach that belongs in Branson rather than SFO or NYC.

      1. Dana W
        Flame

        No not really

        Do you mean Porn or porn apps?

        Converting and adding your own videos, porn or otherwise is free, and requires no "jaibreaking" My iPhone is stuffed with Youtube. "And a few good DVDS.

        I don't understand what people are mad at, if you don't want an iPhone, don't buy one. What gets me is everyone's complaining about it, but they don't just use their dollars, and buy something else.

        Nobody MAKES anyone buy an iPhone, get something else and stop whining about the fact that everyone else is having fun. Seriously, this is like arguing about sex with Baptists. You guys are just mad because you hate iPhone and people refuse to agree with you and hate it too.

    4. ShellShockeD
      FAIL

      re-untiltled

      dana w said..

      You can have all the porn you want on your iPhone, Apple just won't put it on there FOR you. I don't know why this concept is difficult to understand. Its not like they have some filter preventing you from doing it yourself, or even downloading and saving any pictures you like, and flipping though them at your leisure.

      No I could not cause I will never ever have itunes on my pc so your argument is bollocks

  10. Graham Bartlett

    "Exploding body parts"

    Hell, that even rules out Lemmings! Not to mention every single iD FPS, which are all seen as pretty old-school now.

  11. optimusfisher
    WTF?

    @Bill Ray

    "That's assuming there are any developers; there still aren't any Windows Phone 7 handsets to play with, and the demonstrated feature set is unimpressive compared to Apple's iPhone 4 and even what Android is offering these days."

    What? Let's get a few things clear. It is a GOOD thing that all of the developer support material and the SDK are available well in advance of the handsets. This allows developers time to begin working on applcations prior to handset release increasing the potential for a library of quality apps at release. That's far better than Google's approach of just dropping new code with no lead time given to developers to deal with the fact that their apps are now busted by the newest fragment. The Windows Phone 7 SDK is lightyears better than what Apple has available. What feature set exactly does the iPhone and Adroid have that WP7 is missing out on? I can think of a few things WP7 has going for it that iPhone and Android don't. For the business folks there is full proper integration with Exchange and Sharepoint along with actual security features. For the youngins there are XNA based games. Devs have already ported games built for Xbox Live to WP7 with very few tweaks because they both use XNA. Microsoft is working on being very good to the devs with WP7. It is the same approach they took with Xbox that allowed them to come from nowhere to overtake Sony.

  12. paul brain
    Terminator

    Doesn't really matter

    No one will buy a win 7 phone anyway, so block all you like MS.

    You're too late to the party, and we're all having a great time without you.

    Proud Nexus One owner ;-)

  13. Anonymous Coward
    Linux

    ...and ...and

    And no fat chicks in spandex, and midgets in drag, or them brown people. Fuck you Microsoft, and fuck you Apple. Letting companies tell you what you can install on your devices is an awesome trend, so keep buying those Iphones and Win7 devices.

  14. Eduard Coli
    FAIL

    BetaMax all over again

    Some might think it was the expensive totalitarian licensing regime that killed BetaMax but what also played a big role was a porn ban.

    1. Jess

      Porn ban on beta?

      First I've heard of that. But apparently the much greater availability of it on VHS help significantly with its market share. (I had a Laservision, not much porn on there)

    2. Oz
      Pirate

      Porn on Betamax

      There was p0rn on Betamax.

      The big problem was the size of film that could contained on a physical media item. Longer movies required 2 Betamax tapes, but only 1 VHS - hence VHS was the preferred medium for film distributors and home buyers alike.

  15. Anonymous Coward
    FAIL

    christian nazis rock - when their blitzkrieg begins to roll.

    Isn't is fun how all these tossers base their "righteousness" on the badness of the body and sex, and that comes out of a book , that was written by shit fro brains cultists, who all write different and conflicting things to suit themselves as they go along, and then the idiots who ripped off the Code of Hammurabi from Babylon, are now getting these whacko's creating more rules to suite themselves as they go along, that everyone else has to be subjected too.

    I like online sex, I won't buy your christian nazi product tho - nor will I be tailed by the company thought police, for saying Microsoft and Apple suck big time.

  16. noodle heimer

    so, the native apps

    Are basically prohibited from implementing the top two uses for any computing device.

    Brilliant.

  17. Pablo
    Paris Hilton

    I'm honestly a little surprised

    Not that M$ won't allow pr0n in their app store, but that they're following in Apple's footsteps and telling people what they can and can't install on their own hardware. I would have thought they'd try to differentiate themselves a bit. If M$ insists on using the same F'd up business model, why would anyone choose their phone over the already popular iPhone?

  18. Henry Wertz 1 Gold badge

    Betamax

    @Dana W, quite being such a damn fanboi. Banning apps and not bundling apps with the phone are two unrelated things and you know it. (Second sign of fanboi'ism, you are defending Apple for banning porn when the article is about Microsoft being Jobsian this time.)

    "Its like being mad because a company that makes DVD players won't pack in half a dozen porno DVDs with each unit"

    No it's like buying VHS instead of Betamax, because Sony banned porned on Beta. Which Sony did; and even customers who never actually bought a porno tape, bought VHS instead. It was one factor that led to Beta's demise even though it was a technically better tape format. I'm SQUARELY in that camp -- I wouldn't buy a porn app, but nevertheless would buy a phone that doesn't restrict my choices over one that does.

    ------------------

    Anyway... This is dumb, since the browser can pull up unlimited porn, other than videos -- which, despite Jobs denying it, are often flash. Along with everything else on that "banned" list. They (both Apple and Microsoft, and Google if they haven't already) should just stick it in some "over 18" section.

    1. Dana W
      Flame

      No.

      For a start I'm not a "boy" anything, second, my original statement still stands. You can have all the porn you want on your iPhone, Apple just won't put it there for you. Why does Apple have to be a porn store if they don't want to be? Its called freedom of choice, they don't have to sell porn and you don't need to buy an iPhone. If Apple is so horrible why do any of you care? Vote with your money and buy elsewhere. You have every right to NOT by Apple products. Its ok, we won't miss you. I hear there are great sale prices on ZUNE HD as we speak. And Android is ready when you are.

      What you really hate is the fact that millions of people like it just fine and us geeks are not the core technology market anymore. Yes, sucks to be us. But there it is.

      Your VHS vs Betamax argument is silly simply for the fact that VHS and Betamax are physical media. With a computer any file format is any other file format using Handbrake or Max, I crunch video and audio constantly.

      And funnier still is the fact that Microsoft is so intellectually bankrupt they are even trying to copy parts of Apple's business model. Before you know it , Steve Ballmer will be appearing in jeans and a black turtleneck. Heh, I bet Ballmer gets an organ transplant next. Whats he best suited for? A Heart or a brain?

  19. Ascylto
    Gates Horns

    Asocial

    "Applications for Windows Phone 7 won't contain porn or decapitation"

    So, that's Microsoft's Windows 7 market collapse before we've started.

  20. Jean-Paul
    Gates Halo

    MS is clever

    They've finally realised that people want some consistency and software that actually works and not be afraid of using to loose their details...Good on them putting some checks and balances on their store, it's that lack of verification on the Google MarketPlace that stops my wife, and me using it....

    I can't believe there are so many dumb posts about the Apple model...You can put any logical type of media on it regarding any subject, all you do is convert it into the correct format. No need to compromise your device through jail breaking and the sorts. Sure you can't download it through the online iTunes store on the device but it doesn't limit you to the iTunes Store so what is the problem?

  21. Martin Nicholls
    Grenade

    This is why...

    I'm never buying a microsoft or apple phone. I could care less about the porn - never did understand the point on phones - it's the control that makes me vomit.

    Not thanks guys I'll install what I want on my phone. Fk you and your worthless appstores.

  22. Matt Hawkins
    Megaphone

    Thought Police

    "Its called freedom of choice, they don't have to sell porn and you don't need to buy an iPhone"

    Luckily millions of people aren't buying iPhones.

    No one expects Apple to sell Porn but people should be allowed to install whatever apps they like. Companies/Governments that like banning stuff rarely stop once they've got going.

    Porn is always the start because it is so easy to convince people that the World would be a better place without naked pictures. Obviously they are wrong.

    Usually the logic is :

    Naked people engaging in natural, consensual, legal activities. Bad. Ban it !

    Someone getting their head smashed onto an upright pencil. Good. Show it to the kids. Even if they are under 12.

  23. Anonymous Coward
    Troll

    Repurposing the Taliban

    Give OBL and chums the job of deciding what is acceptable for Americans and the west and there would be no need for any so-called war on terror.

    Funny how we are fighting for freedom from puritanical values on one hand and taking the very same freedoms away with the other.

  24. Markk

    Wish it were a quality standard, not political one!

    I find perving at a tiny screen, well, unsatisfying - much like over compressed and DRM corrupted audio on earbuds. Wish that were banned. Holding the phone in one hand and tossing with the other doesn't work for me!

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