Staff, be prepared.
I look forward to seeing the staff at my local Tesco being trained in the art of fingerprint analysis.
"Sorry sir, I know it looks like you but there's an arch where there should be a whirl. No Pinot Grigio for you!"
The Home Office is to spend over £500,000 this year on a marketing campaign for the identity card which features cartoon fingerprints. A departmental spokesperson told GC News that it is planning a public information campaign to alert businesses on the need to prepare for the introduction of the card, which will initially be …
Kids advertising for the adults... Yeah, come on... sounds cool. You know it makes sense...
Thundercats selling the tax return forms.
Batfink trying to sell me on the requirement to provide for my own pension?
The DVLA using Top Cat to remind me about my car tax?
Nu Labour.... ***kin' idiots
Epic waste of cash, £500,000 of money that could be better used to provide the NHS some nurses, or perhaps some front line troops a working Gun/armour/jeep/plane/boat.
Flames because Guy Fawkes was right.
Use of artificial characters is just a step forward from the last great political faux pas forced on Manchester: When the council were pushing the Congestion Charge, people were shown on adverts waxing lyrical about how good it was going to be for them travelling on public transport etc. The only problem was, they were American actors.
At least this way, they can't be rumbled for using people who don't even live in the affected area!
Despite the Great Shiny-Headed One's promises, if/when the Tories get in they will immediately come up with a 'homeland security' scheme to ensure that every migrant worker has a card. Then they will tackle the problem of teenage drinkers and social security scroungers. To cope with the large numbers of unemployed it will be necessary to have an easier way of processing people - especially as the number of staff to deal with unemployment will be cut (central government natural wastage). Eventually it will be seen as a 'good thing' as "only those who have something to hide" will refuse an ID card and those refuseniks wil be prosecuted.
So, no more bollocks about 'when NU LAb are kicked out', please. The Tories will be far, far worse as they have all thier mates in the city to protect first and fuck the rest of us.
For £500,000, I will do the advert for them. Really.
FFS - £500,000 this year on a marketing campaign for the identity card which features cartoon fingerprints.
I really don't see the point of a seperate card to the passport etc. TBH - from a technical point of view I would prefer if it was like Sweden where the bank cards have your photo printed on them and job details etc. At least banks have the security infrastructure in place.
This would be the government that is going to reign in overspending, force banks to not have such obscene bonuses, make sweeping cuts in public spending and make government more answerable to the general public by reintroducing democracy - much as they've been doing these past ten years then.
>and know how to check the security features.< you just flick it, yea?
Labour: Promises as above if they get back in, in actuality, trying to force thru ID cards, extra tax on broadband and kicking off the very people who made broadband popular in the first place. Of course, the general populace now require broadband to watch the flash adverts and rewatch Eastenders 'cos 'this week it was bloody good!'
Thanks for ruining my broadband general populace!
This post has been deleted by its author
You are the man from the onion!
CHAPEL HILL, NC–Area resident Jonathan Green does not own a television, a fact he repeatedly points out to friends, family, and coworkers–as well as to his mailman, neighborhood convenience-store clerks, and the man who cleans the hallways in his apartment building.
http://www.theonion.com/content/node/28694
The PR campaign doesn't testify of a great sense of timing. But, coming from Belgium, the idea of a central database with all inhabitants of a country isn't such a big thing. Such a database exists in Belgium for decades - made official in legislation in 1983. I do understand people are afraid of this, but in the end it all comes down to how much you trust your government with sensitive information. I gather this trust is around absolute zero in the UK.
I think everybody knows what's going to happen next: the government will let you 'opt in' for a year or 5, then it'll become mandatory for everyone, with no 'opt out'.
"Despite the Great Shiny-Headed One's promises, if/when the Tories get in they will immediately come up with a 'homeland security' scheme to ensure that every migrant worker has a card. Then they will tackle the problem of teenage drinkers and social security scroungers. To cope with the large numbers of unemployed it will be necessary to have an easier way of processing people - especially as the number of staff to deal with unemployment will be cut (central government natural wastage). Eventually it will be seen as a 'good thing' as "only those who have something to hide" will refuse an ID card and those refuseniks wil (sic) be prosecuted."
Although I also do not generally trust the Tories I think you are mistaken, for some or all of the following reasons:
(1) David "call me Dave" Cameron has already gone on record saying he is against ID cards and will scrap the scheme.
(2) Migrant workers already have a passport which shows their status and right to work.
(3) Non migrant workers (us) already have a NI number which shows our status and right to work
(3a) These days if you apply for a job you will have to prove your right to work no matter what your nationality
(4) Underage looking drinkers already have to provide ID to prove their age anyway.
(5) Benefit recipients will have to meet the same criteria as workers regarding eligibility.
So, although the Tories will certainly try to erode your freedoms it is a fair bet they will not do it through the medium of ID cards. As shown above the information is already available anyway.
'Businesses need to ensure that their staff are ready to recognise the National Identity Card, and know how to check the security features."'
That would be the noise it makes when you flick it then? Let's hope they put one of those musical card chips inside it so it plays a jolly tune while an authoritative demon-headmaster-esque voice says "papers please"
Maybe a hologram of Jacqui Smith wagging her finger in a disapproving fashion while her husband reaches for a cleanex in the background.
We can get Gordo in on the action too, I'm sure he'd love to be pictured in a superman outfit on the back of the card. And I heard a rumour that when you get your picture taken for the card they're going to have you do it in one of those silly cut out beach resort cartoons you can stick your head through. Who said ID wasn't fun?
If only someone would invent a barcode that looks like a happy face, I'd have it tattooed on my hand tomorrow. Let's be upbeat about this guys.
What about "recognise your employer" or, even better "recognise your MP"? Or how about "recognise your Prime Minister"!
"Well, I'm sorry, but you just because you *look* like Gordon Brown doesn't prove that you *are* Gordon Brown, so I'm going to have to ask for your ID card and fingerprints before we let you come into the Labour Party Conference..."
PS @AC Monday 28th September 2009 11:41 GMT "Well considering you lot (UK people) voted in Nu Labour to power in the first place..."
I sure as hell didn't vote for this bunch of incompetant, power-hungry, nanny state control-freaks! And, for that matter, 65% of the people of this country didn't vote for them either, yet still they got a "majority"!
I see your point and understand where you're coming from, but in this instance the decision to use AC was not one through any kind of "fear" of having my opinions linked with my "handle" but to illustrate the ability to remain anonymous* if one so desires.
While using your own name when standing up for your convictions is to applauded** it kind of ruins the point of making a stand about wanting to be anonymous.
"Hi, my name is Bertie Bertington, but that's absolutely none of your business." doesn't make much sense.
* I know, that's just one issue with regards to the National ID card and the database state, but I feel I've expressed my feelings towards the rest of it pretty clearly.
** Although quite often a little foolhardy.
'So, no more bollocks about 'when NU LAb are kicked out', please. The Tories will be far, far worse as they have all thier mates in the city to protect first and fuck the rest of us.'
.... which of course is completely unlike Labour who protected all their mates in the city, with taxpayers money, when the bubble they created finally burst and ***ked the rest of us.
Only the rest of our childrens' lives to pay it back through even more shafting taxes....
Nah mate, Labour have ***ked us up far worse. Need to take off your Labour rose tinted specs and understand that your lifestyle is going to be seriously cramped for the payback....
Well I reckon Gordon can use some influence to get a free batch issued to the merry men and women of the PLP?
Can't be too careful. After all with all their details on the database of those £64k PA jobs it's likely the best way to beef up the security on this virtual stiched together system.
"
"(1) David "call me Dave" Cameron has already gone on record saying he is against ID cards and will scrap the scheme"
Hold on there jest a minute Muskie -- are you saying you trust a politician?
"
Absolutely not, however I trust a politician to understand the damage that will be done should he make an absolute statement and then fail to deliver.
Politicians will only be trusted when they face consequences for lying. If they renege on manifesto promises, or suddenly bring up ideas that they've been nurturing back in their lairs but didn't mention until they were safely ensconced, then they should immediately have to take it to the country. No nice 'retirement' pay-offs like those caught with their noses in the expenses trough either.