back to article Wi-Fi finds its way into park bench

A designer’s inked plans for a hi-tech park bench boasting solar panels, Wi-Fi and broadband. solar_bench_02 Designer Owen Song's Solar Inside bench, with Wi-Fi Boston-based Owen Song’s Solar Inside concept bench would have a layer of solar panels integrated into its seating surface, which would presumably be used to power …

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  1. Ash
    Flame

    So not only can we boil our top brain

    But we can irradiate the little brain too!

    Warming.

  2. Anonymous Coward
    Thumb Down

    Won't work so well...

    ...once its had a few tramps piss on it, kids have set it on fire and someones carved "brian is a cock" into it.

  3. Anonymous Coward
    Dead Vulture

    Re: "Reg Hardware can see one potential problem..."

    Er, you missed the fact that it'll also slowly roast your testicles while you are sitting on it.

  4. Anonymous Coward
    Pirate

    I hope that...

    ...they're well bolted down. I've never had the desire to steal a park bench until I saw those ones!

  5. Neil

    If they made the seats

    in the same way as the kinetic dance floors you get in clubs, you could kill 2 birds with one stone.

    http://www.interactivearchitecture.org/eco-dance-floor.html

    Especially with the increasing mass of the average westerner...

  6. Jason Togneri
    Stop

    Ummm

    And what with solar receptivity and wi-fi signal being cut by bums on seats, won't they be even further reduced once the thing's been slashed, burned, vomited on and covered with grafitti?

    Don't put anything valuable, delicate or sensitive in a public place, particularly not in a park.

  7. Tony Hoyle

    These things would last about 30 seconds

    Nice shiny surface to graffiti on.. and what's that seat surface? Solar panels? They'd be the first thing to break.

    There's a reason why park benches are concrete with a couple of planks stuck between them.

  8. TheRealMcoy
    Thumb Up

    Nice concept, no sure on the implementation

    Good idea in principle, but don't solar panels get sort of, well, hot in the sun? I don't think I'll be putting my cheeks on that.

    The secondary function will defeat the primary function of this design I would have thought.

    Secondly, solar panels are quite expensive and would be open to theft. Better to separate the functions out and have the panels up high and separate, perhaps an overarching roof so that there is some shade on some of the benches, and shelter from the rain?

    Nice idea though

  9. Martin Huizing
    Thumb Down

    Faulty by design.

    If the bench is popular, it will be occupied constantly. Being so, sunlight would be blocked and 'batteries' not charged.

    I have a better idea. A bench with a foot-operated pedal with dynamo. Power galore even when the sun is down. Wobbly legs would bump the laptop of the, eh... lap, but I am sure we can think of something for that too.

  10. Michael

    That's great...

    ...but wi-fi is a little pointless without a pipe to the web. My guess is that these park benches are little more than wireless repeaters. Not really all that impressive.

    How long before it gets hacked?

  11. Anonymous Coward
    Coat

    @Michael

    You didn't finish your comment- it should have read "How long before it gets hacked apart by some drunkard with an axe?".

    Could be a good idea somewhere like a corporate campus- you'd have access to a decent internet connection nearby, many corporate places already have wireless- so this could be repeated rather than running a cable / fiber out to the bench, and it'd be relatively safe from vandalism. Plus there's only a few times of day when it's likely to be fully occupied.

    Its reputation as a todger tadpole toaster are wholly unfounded- the power requirements would be tiny if the WiFi was just covering a couple of meters. Given that it's fixed infrastructure, its backhaul coud even be directional, lowering power requirements further. And even if it was a couple of watts of power, it's not like the affected areas don't have sufficient surface area to dissipate that energy. Not that I'm bragging or anything!

  12. Stuart Castle Silver badge

    Pointless...

    My friend's local council had a bit of a problem with hooligans in one of their parks. In an effort to improve facilities for the local residents, they refurbished the park. They put in several tennis courts, done up small bridge over the stream that runs through the park and replaced all the lighting with state of the art lighting.

    A rumour said they spent about £250,000 doing it..

    Within two weeks every light was smashed. This bench, if it were to be introduced, would go the same way,

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