back to article Storage Christmas cracker: My band is called 1023MB. We haven't had a gig yet

Here's a final collection of storage news before Christmas 2017. Imagine you are having Christmas dinner and you get a bunch of crackers. Pull them and, instead of fortune cookie statements and bad jokes, this list of news items tumbles out. My, how much richer your Christmas dinner would ... we'll go away now. Comtrade …

  1. Lt.Kije

    Retired

    Christ, my retirement didn't come a day too soon.

    Good luck with that lot.

  2. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    1023? Surely it's 1024?

    1,2,4,8,16,32,64,128,256,512,1024.

    My bands called "Missing Cat", I'm sure you've seen our posters.

    Edit: I really am dense... 1023...

    1. Jim Mitchell
      Facepalm

      The problem here is that storage gigabytes are "short", 1GB == 1000MB. So the band has already had 1 gig and change!

      1. This post has been deleted by its author

      2. Danny 14

        yup. the marketters would have jumped on that one as more than a gig.

  3. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    In order to bring AI and machine learning to more business users, organizations will need to implement a sound cloud data management strategy to put all of their data in one location for users to organize, analyze and prepare for AI/machine learning applications. Add bit from other parts and.... By this time next year we will have to bear with Data Warehousing 2.0?

  4. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Bollocks

    GCP hasn't picked Nutanix, this is an obviously false statement. Nutanix has picked GCP for resale for their Xi product in a desperate attempt to be the company that does everything. Also, works only with AHV (market share 0.02%). For everyone else, namely those running ESX and Hyper-V, AWS and Hyper-V are available out of the box.

    As to GCP/GKE, if anything, Google has picked Cisco for on premises container/microservices with Kubernetes and Istios. And it's a real technology alliance instead of a reseller agreement.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: HCI - the great distraction of our time.

      Can't speak to Cisco, but Xi doesn't actually run in Google. It runs NEAR google (IE equinox). You still have to pay for transit in/out of google so this isn't anything like VMW on AWS..

  5. DNTP

    I can't wait to see what...

    ...the new year has in *store* for IT. Ugh, who writes jokes this bad. Oh yeah, it was me. OK, here's the 2018 predictions from my end.

    1. I'm going to keep buying hard drives, 2. I'm going to keep paying some dudes to keep doing site backups, 3. I'm going to keep getting sales calls every two weeks from everyone and their mother who wants me to sell me on running and storing stuff in their interpretation of 'the cloud'.

    1. Danny 14

      Re: I can't wait to see what...

      dont forget the print management companies and telecoms who can guarantee that they can save you money.

      then they ask what you do. i usually say "we are a telecoms reseller" or "print management reseller"

      youd be surprised how fast it gets rid of people. even though we are a school.

    2. Thomas Kenyon

      Re: I can't wait to see what...

      Fielding these calls are even not frustrating when your site only has .25Mbit upstream.

  6. MatsSvensson

    A bit funny

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6EhvzmKIvRE

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: A bit funny

      Even better: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sXH4fPaYhOE

  7. Daniel Garcia 2
    Pint

    Heavens Delight

    "Do more with less – CIOs need to seriously rethink how to not just consolidate within a silo, but how to eliminate silos altogether."

    This brings me the image of Zen mystics levitating on lotus posture on the middle of an empty basement room where previously the old servers were.A wide beam of pure white coming from the heavens energising his chakras and from his body the Sysadmin Zen Master emitting multicoloured waves on every direction, gently touching the now naked data ports on walls and ceiling.

    Yeah, i already found the "magic" stash of the guy that drop that sentence... Happy Xmass

    1. Korev Silver badge
      Joke

      Re: Heavens Delight

      Surely that’d be “Xen mystics”

      1. Danny 14

        Re: Heavens Delight

        do not speak of the citrix by name!

  8. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    How much did Rubrik pay...

    ...for the section title mention when nothing in the items under that area referenced them or their offering?

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