What can you do with adult VR, some bronze gears and a robotic thumb? On a Friday? A VR headset is pressing down on the bridge of my nose. The strap is pulling out strands of hair from the back of my head. I have bruised shins after walking into a coffee table. This, apparently, is "the closest thing to real sex". I must be doing it wrong. VR, that is. Or sex. Or both. Perhaps not expecting to get bruised …
There is a limerick, concerning the inventive prowess of a young man named McClean which highlights the folly of such devices (automated sex toys that is, not the Antikythera mechanism which is definitely int the top 5 of my awesome things catalog), but, even given the liberal and relaxed attitude of El Reg, I'm a little reluctant to post it. It's a proper limerick.
Sorry, but I can't resist posting:
There was a young man from Torbay,Who set sail for China one day.
He was lashed to the tiller
By a sex-crazed gorilla.
And the Far East's a very long way...
As for Mr Dabbs article, I only have two words to say: Oooooooh Matron!
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"Historians reckon the device was designed to calculate a variety of astronomical positions."
Was that one you intended?
Feynman, inevitably, had his own story about the Antikythera mechanism. Back in the days before the museum had realised just what they'd got he was visiting Athens and introduced to the director. Being Feynman of course the mechanism, stored somewhere in the reserve collection, was the one thing he asked about. The director couldn't understand why, given all the beautiful art objects he wanted to see some dirty old bit of metal junk.
Here is a link to your nightmare fullfilled: linky to Youtube
Actually we already do have one, more or less.
The pinky finger is far stronger than it needs to be just to pick noses.
I thought the extra thumb was marvellous. I loved that it appeared to be managed by sensors on the other fingers to provide a degree of independent movement in lieu of actual never connections. Genius, imo.
Shame it had to be accompanied by the inevitable pan-pipe and drum machine soundtrack, mind you.
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Which reminds me of :
If our forefathers had invented foreplay,
Do you think they used their forehands or their foreheads.
I just can't remember where it's from...
Just think, by the time VR Porn is useful, it'll probably be a criminal offence in the UK.
The Antikythera Mechanism dates, I believe, from shortly before the Romans took over Greece and enslaved most of the intelligentsia. The Romans weren't interested in metal things unless they were good for stabbing, slicing or preventing someone doing the stabbing and slicing to them.
But for the Romans, the Babbage equivalent might have happened in the 1st century BCE, and history might have been enormously different. The Greek problem was a lack of fuel making it difficult to manufacture large metal objects. If only they had access to oil, they could have had an industrial revolution by the 1st century.
"If only they had access to oil, they could have had an industrial revolution by the 1st century."
Not that fast. You have to do a lot to the crude oil first until you have something really useful. They'd have to come up with a bit of petrochemistry. And to do that at a large scale, you'd need at least a budding metal producing and processing industry to build the infrastructure. It's less complicated if you start with coal.
"Not that fast. You have to do a lot to the crude oil first until you have something really useful."
Not if all you want to do is produce enough heat to produce a fair bit of bronze and other copper alloys. It's worth remembering that when the first petrol cars appeared, the fuel was bought from pharmacists by the quart. I suspect that the Greeks, who had already discovered how to use naptha to annoy enemy ships, would quickly have worked out basic petroleum distillation, since they were able to make vessels of both ceramic and bronze.
Coal is convenient because it burns nicely in lumps, but the substance that really caused American expansion (and US/UK involvement in the ME) was oil. It's hard to believe that if oil supplies had been plentiful, locomotive makers would quickly have seen the opportunity to eliminate the fireman. Cutting out the coal phase could have speeded up development.
Well, it was not so much the lack of fuel, the greek civilization was doing quite well technologically, but having become more complacent, they did something very modern... They outsourced!
They outsourced one of the most important professions of the time, the profession of warrior...
True to history, after a couple hundred years, the Eastern Roman Empire was practically greek... and lasted another thousand years...
Anonymous Centurion
"Historians reckon the device was designed to calculate a variety of astronomical positions."
Reminds me of the motif that was on lots of seaside souvenirs in the 1970s. Each sign of the Zodiac was represented by a silhouette of a couple - errr coupling***. Each was a different position loosely based on the Karma Sutra.
There were matchboxes for each position with black silhouettes - and T-shirts with all twelve in shocking pink. Apparently no longer PC to wear in the street.
Like the tattered one I have with a single picture - above which is "69" - and below it "Try it - you'll like it". That caused a neighbour to express puzzlement - until her 14 year old daughter went "oh mum!" and enlightened her.
Wearing it even twenty years ago I did get harangued in the street by a woman basically saying "think of the children". To which I replied "if they can see the meaning then it's a bit too late".
Nearest (NSFW) example picture is less subtle than the 1970s ones in the UK. Same shapes but with explicit delineation that removes the humour of the delayed reaction tease of observers.
***obligatory Frankie Howerd reference from the film "Up Pompei"..
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