"and were intercepted earlier this morning off Dover by a news helicopter from the BBC."
I knew the armed forces were running low on capacity but this is ridiculous.
Today marks the 211th anniversary of the Battle of Trafalgar, in which Admiral Horatio Nelson gave the combined naval might of France and Spain a bloody good kicking. The battle was fought off Cape Trafalgar, near Cadiz in south-west Spain. Admiral Nelson's fleet of 27 ships comprehensively defeated 33 French and Spanish …
@Voyna i Mor
I knew the armed forces were running low on capacity but this is ridiculous.
In the old days, the enemy would know the game was up whenever Kate Adie appeared wearing a flak jacket and steel helmet
"In the old days, the enemy would know the game was up whenever Kate Adie appeared wearing a flak jacket and steel helmet"
I may be revealing something I shouldn't, but apparently during Gulf War 1 a member of the BBC production crew approached an army officer and asked if there was any chance of getting hold of an untraceable pistol, because he wanted to shoot Kate Adie before she got them all killed.
The spot on Victory's deck where he fell is marked by a brass plaque that can still be seen today aboard the Victory, which is now moored as a museum ship in Portsmouth.
http://www.hms-victory.com/things-to-see/quarter-deck
note: Since 1922, it's been in No. 2 dry dock, and not moored.
Paris - Lady Hamilton. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Emma,_Lady_Hamilton
(see "Final years" in above link, tragic end to her life after Nelson's death)
Mmm - well as well as preserving his body in 'refined spirits' (it did happen according to the best sources), sailors were found t o have tapped into the barrel to relieve their thirst (supposedly the origin of the term 'tapping the admiral' - although that bit is disputed (the term) anyway.
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The English navy trained mainly for high rates of fire at very close range, directly at the gun crews of the enemy, and had superior gun tech too. The French tended to focus on shooting out the enemies' rigging to immobilize them.
In most of the battle there was very little wind, so little that ships were towed into position with boats. The English strategy and high rate of fire quickly suppressed enemy cannon fire, while damage to their own rigging meant little.
The Spanish ships were huge but woefully out of date, basically big targets after the first few volleys.
The tried and tested policy of blockade by RN to keep the enemy from trade.
It also prevented the enemy from getting valuable sea time. If you'll read the history, the French Admiral was a) forced to sail and not on a day of his choosing thus the weather was against him. b) His plans were originally not to line up and be sitting ducks. However the lack of sailing time and ability to maneuver was not present in the French and Spanish forces. c) Gun training time was almost zilch as there was no live fire training permitted in harbors.
Villeneuve knew his fleet was doomed even before they set sail.
Nelson: "Order the signal, Hardy."
Hardy: "Aye, aye sir."
Nelson: "Hold on, that's not what I dictated to Flags. What's the meaning of this?"
Hardy: "Sorry sir?"
Nelson (reading aloud): "' England expects every person to do his or her duty, regardless of race, gender, sexual orientation, religious persuasion or disability.' - What gobbledegook is this?"
Hardy: "Admiralty policy, I'm afraid, sir. We're an equal opportunities employer now. We had the devil's own job getting 'England ' past the censors, lest it be considered racist."
Nelson: "Gadzooks, Hardy. Hand me my pipe and tobacco."
Hardy: "Sorry sir. All naval vessels have now been designated smoke-free working environments."
Nelson: "In that case, break open the rum ration. Let us splice the mainbrace to steel the men before battle."
Hardy: "The rum ration has been abolished, Admiral. Its part of the Government's policy on binge drinking."
Nelson: "Good heavens, Hardy. I suppose we'd better get on with it ........... full speed ahead."
Hardy: "I think you'll find that there's a 4 knot speed limit in this stretch of water."
Nelson: "Damn it man! We are on the eve of the greatest sea battle in history. We must advance with all dispatch. Report from the crow's nest please."
Hardy: "That won't be possible, sir."
Nelson: "What?"
Hardy: "Health and Safety have closed the crow's nest, sir. No harness; and they said that rope ladders don't meet regulations. They won't let anyone up there until a proper scaffolding can be erected."
Nelson: "Then get me the ship's carpenter without delay, Hardy."
Hardy: "He's busy knocking up a wheelchair access to the foredeck Admiral."
Nelson: "Wheelchair access? I've never heard anything so absurd."
Hardy: "Health and safety again, sir. We have to provide a barrier-free environment for the differently abled."
Nelson: "Differently abled? I've only one arm and one eye and I refuse even to hear mention of the word. I didn't rise to the rank of admiral by playing the disability card."
Hardy: "Actually, sir, you did. The Royal Navy is under represented in the areas of visual impairment and limb deficiency."
Nelson: "Whatever next? Give me full sail. The salt spray beckons."
Hardy: "A couple of problems there too, sir. Health and safety won't let the crew up the rigging without hard hats. And they don't want anyone breathing in too much salt - haven't you seen the adverts?"
Nelson: "I've never heard such infamy. Break out the cannon and tell the men to stand by to engage the enemy."
Hardy: "The men are a bit worried about shooting at anyone, Admiral."
Nelson: "What? This is mutiny!"
Hardy: "It's not that, sir. It's just that they're afraid of being charged with murder if they actually kill anyone. There's a couple of legal-aid lawyers on board, watching everyone like hawks."
Nelson: "Then how are we to sink the Frenchies and the Spanish?"
Hardy: "Actually, sir, we're not."
Nelson: "We're not?"
Hardy: "No, sir. The French and the Spanish are our European partners now. According to the Common Fisheries Policy, we shouldn't even be in this stretch of water. We could get hit with a claim for compensation."
Nelson: "But you must hate a Frenchman as you hate the devil."
Hardy: "I wouldn't let the ship's diversity co-ordinator hear you saying that sir. You'll be up on disciplinary report."
Nelson: "You must consider every man an enemy, who speaks ill of your King."
Hardy: "Not any more, sir. We must be inclusive in this multicultural age. Now put on your Kevlar vest; it's the rules. It could save your life"
Nelson: "Don't tell me - health and safety. Whatever happened to rum, sodomy and the lash?"
Hardy: As I explained, sir, rum is off the menu! And there's a ban on corporal punishment."
Nelson: "What about sodomy?"
Hardy: "I believe that is now legal, sir."
Nelson: "In that case............................... kiss me, Hardy."
Bloody hell... you say the HMS Warrior crew have stolen the deck from HMS Victory! Keelhaul the blaggards!
(HMS Warrior was only launched in 1860, Nelson never stood on it. It is also iron-hulled and still afloat, not far from HMS Victory's dry dock)
> the Russian navy is sailing its sole aircraft carrier, the Admiral Kuznetsov, plus a task group of warships through the English Channel.
At the beginning of the last century Admiral Rozhestvensky went that way as he sailed the second pacific squadron towards Japan to participate in the Russian version of Trafalgar.
Sadly for Rozhestvensky it was Trafalgar as seen from the French and Spanish point of view. Admiral Togo crushed them at Tsushima in a completely one sided shoeing.
The story of the second pacific squadron's journey is pretty much black comedy from begin to ignominious end. One hopes the Kuznetsov's sailors have an easier journey. That and that they don't shoot up any trawlers on the Dogger bank...
As the two battle fleets made stately progression towards each other in the gentle morning breeze, Admiral Villeneuve made a signal. Having read the flags the midshipman on duty rushed to Lord Nelson and said "I don't understand the flags sir - With water, it is time."
Nelson decided to check the signal. Having considered the signal Nelson turned to the snotty and replied "No, you need to read the signal in the original French - A l'eau, c'est l'heure."
Worth noting that the victories at Trafalgar and then Waterloo ... THANKS in part to people from other countries:
"The crews of the ships that fought at Trafalgar included sailors from America, Ireland, Prussia, Sweden, the West Indies, Africa, and even France and Spain against whom the British were fighting. On Nelson's ship HMS Victory there were 22 nationalities involved in fighting on the British side."
Ditto at Waterloo..
200+ years later we think we can be great standing on our own? Errr no.
> even France and Spain against whom the British were fighting
Not usual for sailors to stay on with their ship after capture, French and Spanish similarly had many British/Colonial crewmen. At critical periods such as this the ships moored well out of port to prevent the very numerous pressed crewman going AWOL. Boat loads of loose ladies, alcohol etc were sent out for the duration.
>200+ years later we think we can be great standing on our own? Errr no
Well, sort of - the 3500 Irish sailors and marines were considered British at the time - of the remaining 15,000 or so at Trafalgar well over 14,000 were British mainlanders.
"The crews of the ships that fought at Trafalgar included sailors from America, Ireland, Prussia, Sweden, the West Indies, Africa, and even France and Spain against whom the British were fighting. On Nelson's ship HMS Victory there were 22 nationalities involved in fighting on the British side."
The Americans on there were one of the reasons that we had the War of 1812.
It's also interesting to note that the UK had absolutely no controls on immigration up until just the point where the British Empire started to decline. Correlation isn't causation, of course.
Notable too that Germans were there on our side at Trafalgar, just as at every other major British battle in history other than the (admittedly rather large) anomaly of the two World Wars in the 20th century. The EU thing might have worked out better if we'd done the traditional thing and allied with the Germans against the French (politically speaking, natch*).
*Although come to think of it, even UKIPers would probably change their minds about the EU if we could use it to abolish France.
"Tactical genius Nelson defied conventional wisdom by cutting the enemy line in three, sailing two columns across the middle of the Franco-Spanish line".
Nelson was certainly a great admiral, combining the "mad dog" style of aggression very much in favour with the Admiralty and the British people with a deep and wide knowledge of all things naval. However the tactic of cutting across the enemy line, rather than sailing parallel to it, was by no means new at Trafalgar. Offhand I can think of the "Glorious First of June" in 1794, when Howe had done something very similar (mutatis mutandis). I suspect that British admirals had been using such tactics, on and off, throughout most of the 18th Century. The idea was based on the observation that British ships were superior in one-to-one combat, could fire faster and more accurately than their opponents, and therefore benefitted from a close-in, confused battle.
There was also an element of protection in 'lose the battle, win the war' if it all went wrong: the British had much better access to suitable wood to build ships' hulls out of than the French, so even in the even that the French caused somewhat more damage, the long-term effects would still be in Britain's favour.
While British ships were indeed superior pound-for-pound, the significant tactical advantage was that they left a chunk of the enemy line downwind of them and needing to (slowly) tack back upwind to get back into the battle, while they hammered the rest of the enemy fleet.