back to article HPE sharpens knife for next salami-slicing staff redundo round

HPE is aiming its guns at 220 roles in the UK and Ireland in what appears to be becoming its quarterly firing exercise at the biz. In a memo sent to staff seen by The Register, Maurice Mattholie, HPE UK and MEMA veep of Infrastructure Technology Outsourcing (ITO), told employees the move was part of its Workforce Management …

  1. Steve Davies 3 Silver badge

    Will the last one out

    please switch the lights off and shut the doors.

    Honestly, how many are there left to sack apart from those with corner offices?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Will the last one out

      Leave the lights on because the army of useless grads is about to blot out the sun.

  2. Tony S

    "...give HPE the needed workforce to be a more nimble customer- and partner-centric company

    (Nimble = they all have to do 3 times as much work as before.)

    That is a really shitty, mealy mouthed piece of garbage. What they are showing, quite clearly is that they simply do not give the furry crack of a rat's arse about their staff, their customers or their partners.

    What the c-level suits do care about is trying to maintain the value of their shares and quarterly bonuses. Nothing else at all.

    They are despicable and beyond contempt.

    1. Preston Munchensonton

      It's worse than you think

      What they are showing, quite clearly is that they simply do not give the furry crack of a rat's arse about their staff, their customers or their partners.

      Given the number of paper pushers that couldn't tech their way out of a wet paper bag, the truth is that most of the "layoffs" are really good people heading for the doors anyway. That leaves the paper-pushing retards left holding the bag with nothing but that blank stare to keep them company.

      1. Erik4872

        Re: It's worse than you think

        Not sure what's going on at HPE these days, but haven't the paper pusher types pretty much been let go by now? Having dealt with them as a customer, I do know there are way too many account execs, etc. But I thought HP got rid of 30,000 staff. Isn't that basically all of EDS, where I'm sure most of the paper pushers came from?

        1. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: It's worse than you think

          Agree that there are way too many account execs etc. However 30,000 is not by any means all of HP ES. ES still has > 100,000 employees.

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      They'd make it "a more nimble and customer/partner centric company"

      by removing all the ridiculous red tape and stifling processes that the workforce have to follow. All of those intelligent and wonderful staff (who are quickly heading for the door) aren't allowed to act on initiative as the HP management model dictates that they shouldn't. Getting rid of more staff won't change that, but it's easier than fixing the organisation's underlying problems, which is why they're swinging the axe.

      As an ex-HPEr, the staff who are threatened have my sympathies. If it's any comfort for the staff leaving, it won't be long before you have an agency knocking on your door, asking you to come back as a contractor to perform your previous role - it happened to me this week, 2 months after I left. Hopefully by then the staff concerned will be in a much better job and tell them to sling it.

  3. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Worth how much?

    Enterprise Services (ES) division, which is spun out and is being merged with CSC to create an entity worth $26bn (£20bn)

    Go on then, HP. Sell the entity, and we'll see what you get for it. I'll wager a whole lot less than £20bn.

    1. BebopWeBop
      Facepalm

      Re: Worth how much?

      Quite. There is worth and bonus oriented 'internal value' - who is to know?

    2. Why Not?

      Re: Worth how much?

      just about enough to get a round at the HP pub probably.

      Would of thought there was enough work out there to employ the shadow of HP after they have bought & sacked almost everyone else.

  4. Dr Who

    To me

    It looks more like a chorizo.

    1. BebopWeBop

      Re: To me

      Rotten chorizo

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: To me

        No, Nice chorizo.

  5. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    http://forums.channelregister.co.uk/forum/1/2016/07/04/hpe_july_redundancies/

    "The good news for ITO bods is this quarter’s actions could be the last of the cost hacking, by HPE anyway."

    My comment at the time:

    "No it won't be. It never is."

    If you've not got out already, get out now. This set of spivs won't be happy until their isn't a single employee left outside of the CxO pod and they can realise their 100% profitability/zero costs projections.

  6. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    It's simple maths people...

    People cost money.

    So get rid of people to save money.

    Continue till number of people = 0 for maximum value.

    ....

    What's that you say - we need people to do 'work'...? We don't need workers - we have comp-uters and cheap grads for that.

    Quality doesn't pay the bonuses bitch. Now get back to your cube you proles and be grateful for the free chair you've been given....

  7. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Just think...

    ...eventually all these companies will be making infinity dollars per employee per year!!!

  8. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Not a nice place to work at just now. whole workforce is demotivated and in fear of getting made redundant. Yet HPE are still hiring £300 a day contractor roles.

    1. Steve Davies 3 Silver badge

      £300/day contractors

      last year those same roles were £400+/day

      more money for those exec bonuses

  9. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    CA layoffs

    UK isn't the only region affected. A CA warn report for 1-jul to 10-aug (http://www.edd.ca.gov/jobs_and_training/warn/WARN-Report-for-7-1-2016-to-08-10-2016.pdf) indicates that 89 folks in Palo Alto were shown the door, and 59 in Roseville.

  10. Stuart Tomlinson

    Have 5 mates who work there, who seem to be checking email every week in fear of getting canned, while I get emails and/or calls every week from recruiters trying to get me to jump ship! Its a very strange business model...

  11. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Totally disorganised

    I remember going to one of the meetings at the Lytham site the back-end of last year where they outlined the consolidation of the various sites around the country to the 'Regional Delivery Centres' and explained that there would be some redundancies.

    There were ten managers there to host the meeting - some of them very senior - but not one person was present from HR. Whenever anyone asked them a question, not one of the managers could provide a complete answer, and in most cases they couldn't answer because it was a HR related question, so the stock answer was usually, "We'll take that away and get back to you." It was extremely embarrassing, and made them look so incompetent.

    Considering the seniority of some of these managers, their annual salaries must collectively have been in the region of six or seven hundred grand a year or even more. Why weren't some of these management positions subsequently jettisoned when the staff actually doing the work were shown the door?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Totally disorganised

      Some of these managers may be about to get their comeuppance. There are some who realise that they are non-delivery heads and who are getting a bit nervous about the CSC spin-merge thing.

  12. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Pathetic company

    I'm an HPE engineer and am desperate to get out of there, no luck so far but hopefully I'll get something else soon.

    I could go on and on about all the bad practices I see every day but I'll just sum it up by saying HPE is without doubt the worst company I have ever worked for.

    1. scorched_cpu

      Re: Pathetic company

      I agree. I am in the role of a distinguished technologist at this company, have been here just under 2 years and can't wait to get out. Management is atrocious and for any fellow HPE'ers out there, in case you have not heard, the company just canceled your college tuition assistance benefits to save money for the new-co merger.

  13. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Great business model..

    Cutting and dividing themselves into irrelevancy similar to IBM. Who needs workers when you can over-promise, under deliver and only pay fines to the customers who realize they've been had and still have enough left to sue you. Bon voyage to both.

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