The yolks on Kinder then?
Surprise! Magic Kinder app could let hackers send vids to your kids
Security watchers have warned of massive privacy problems with the Magic Kinder App for children. A lack of encryption within the Magic Kinder smartphone app and other security shortcomings open the doors for all sorts of exploits, they claim. Hacktive Security alleges that a malicious user could "read the chat of the …
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Tuesday 5th April 2016 12:57 GMT Camilla Smythe
Bollocks
The "best" bit of the Kinder egg was always the yellow capsule that the "surprise" came in.
I might 'almost' get your drift but...
There is absolutely nothing of merit in respect of a Kinder Egg. A measly bit of 'chocolate' surrounding some bits of dysfunctional and malformed plastic. They are the failed confectioners equivalent of worse than Christmas Crackers.
Whilst I might dislike my parents for other reasons they never bought me one, they must have loved me, but I made the mistake of trying one out for myself when I left home.
"Here you go Camilla. Kinder Surprise."
"Thanks Mum... Uhm what was the Surprise?"
"It's got toys in it."
"We might have to have a discussion about the definition of 'toys'."
"You have to use your imagination."
"Perhaps you can help out with that imagination thang...?"
"Well..."
"Or give me pocket money so *I* can buy liquorice and do squirty black poo?"
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Tuesday 5th April 2016 13:57 GMT Camilla Smythe
Re: Bollocks
Marketing. You can sell anything to anyone if you package it right.
Whut!
http://www.kinder.co.uk/en/kinder-surprise
When I switch off No-Script I get...
Dear Parent, We created this site for you and your family to obtain more information about Kinder. To view this site you must be over 12 years old, or have the permission of a parent... and then get asked to enter my date of birth. Where's the cookie warning?
Bugger being 9yrs old I'll haxxor that one by saying I was born 25/12/2000....
I'm in!!!1!!! Colour me L33T
"Kinder Surprise contains the taste of Kinder chocolate, with a surprise and toy in every single egg. The combination of these three elements creates a world of fun and entertainment that helps children to develop their imagination while reassuring mothers at the same time."
1) Mmmm Shit Chocolate....
2) WTF is this yellow plastic thing..? Must be the surprise.
3) Oh its got some other bits of plastic in it.
Just a moment. Wish my Mom and Pop looked like that.. Yo Parents! Why are you not like these folks on the Kinder Web Site? Hey, Compared to the other kids I'm quite ugly.. maybe I should go full on bulimic, join ISIS or get my parents to Buy Me Kinder Surprise so as I can learn about 'Fun and Entertainment'..'Develop My Imagination'.. and 'Reassure My Mother'.
Sigh, perhaps I should just log in to 'The Router' and edit the XML so I can point its DNS somewhere else so I can do some fucking homework.
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Wednesday 6th April 2016 11:31 GMT Halfmad
Re: What a crock!
Annoyingly my daughter loves kinder eggs, but she's not a huge fan of chocolate so she takes a tiny bit, grabs the yellow egg for the toy then leaves the rest. I don't like chocolate at all, so it usually ends up in the bin..
Yay I've just paid 70p for a toy worth less than 5p, great.
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Tuesday 5th April 2016 12:35 GMT Anonymous Coward
I inadvertantly ate a Kinder easter egg last week
I don't know what it tasted like, but it was definitely not chocolate as I know it. I suspect a great number of kids will be in need of some serious head shrinkage therapy once they find out what the real stuff tastes like. And they start wondering if maybe their parents didn't love them.
I'd use the 'Joke Alert' tag, but I'm not sure I'm joking.
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Tuesday 5th April 2016 14:16 GMT Teiwaz
They should have stuck to their 'traditional' business instead of jumping onto the ' webby' bandwagon (only to fall off the back and look silly).
I personally always enjoyed kinder eggs as a kid, as long as it was one of those toys you had to assemble yourself not some one piece badly painted 'model' I couldn't identify (the only 'disappointment' IMO). If the chocolate was not 'real' chocolate, the same could be said of a lot of other confection (many were truly nasty, 'crunchy frog' to 'spring surprise' nasty).
For the money, a sugar rush and something to entertain for ten to twenty minute before you lost it down the back of the sofa..
Reminds me of the chewing gum in plastic matchboxes with pop-music badge you used to be able to get late 70's early 80's (the amount of money I spent on those to collect the badges and 3 out of 5 of them were 'the clash' - then there was the odd 'score' Toyah with her tit out!!).
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Tuesday 5th April 2016 16:13 GMT Teiwaz
Re: say what?
"based on this crappy photo?
http://www.punk77.co.uk/graphics/bandpunkettesbandpunkettes/toyah.jpg"
Quite possibly same photoshoot, different image (no shades, different pose). Same or similar top though
(I only mentioned the Toyah badge as a funny aside to my comment on kinder eggs - why are we obsessing over it? Have we not matured at all since 1979?)
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Tuesday 5th April 2016 16:38 GMT x 7
Re: say what?
"Have we not matured at all since 1979?"
Nope!
Shame, I never saw her in concert - in fact only time I have ever seen her was at a King Crimson concert at the Albert Hall in the 1990's: she had the royal box to herself and was dressed as the Krimson Queen.
Dunno why she wasn't used in that Dr Who episode with the steampunk Cyberking....
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Tuesday 5th April 2016 17:08 GMT Teiwaz
Re: say what?
""Have we not matured at all since 1979?"
Nope!"
- Clearly not, it was a rhetorical question. I still remember the badge after all these years even if it was lost decades ago.
"Dunno why she wasn't used in that Dr Who episode with the steampunk Cyberking...."
- At first I thought you were referring to the episodes with the 'bertie basset' robot. Must be the hairdo on that old photoshoot reminded me of the Sylvester McCoy era episode 'Happiness Patrol'.
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Tuesday 5th April 2016 22:10 GMT x 7
Re: say what?
"- At first I thought you were referring to the episodes with the 'bertie basset' robot. Must be the hairdo on that old photoshoot reminded me of the Sylvester McCoy era episode 'Happiness Patrol'."
I meant the "Miss Hartigan" character who became the crimson-dressed Cyberqueen in the episode "The Next Doctor". With one of the other lead characters being named "Mr Lake" it seemed more than coincidence. The dress Toyah wore at the Albert Hall concert was very similar to the one worn by the Hartigan character (played by an Irish actress whose name I forget) - it really made me wonder if the set designer or dresser had been at the concert
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Tuesday 5th April 2016 22:03 GMT Mark 85
Re: say what?
based on this crappy photo?
http://bit.ly/1MbdjJl
PS your boss may feel thats NSFW
Thanks for that. Now I'll spend the rest of the day looking for mind bleach.. I know I had some around here left over from following a different link on El Reg....
Icon... if I can't find the mind bleach.. I'll try fire --------------->
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Tuesday 5th April 2016 15:42 GMT Sandtitz
Reminds me of the chewing gum in plastic matchboxes with pop-music badge you used to be able to get late 70's early 80's (the amount of money I spent on those to collect the badges and 3 out of 5 of them were 'the clash' - then there was the odd 'score' Toyah with her tit out!!).
Hey, I managed to collect the complete set of Mexico '86 and Italy '90 playing cards from those bubble gum packs!
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Tuesday 5th April 2016 16:55 GMT Teiwaz
"God forbid that there ever be collectors cards on the Torah....."
Wasn't that done already, according to the bible, Moses came down the mountain carrying the early stone version of collectors cards.
Collectors cards of the Tarot might be an idea...give the born agains or FreeP's something to complain about (not that they really need an excuse or a sane reason)...
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Tuesday 5th April 2016 20:29 GMT allthecoolshortnamesweretaken
I'm English, and as such I crave disappointment. That's why I buy Kinder Surprise. Horrible chocolate; nasty little toy: a double-whammy of disillusionment! Sometimes I eat the toy out of sheer despair. I call them the Eggs Of Numbing Inevitability. And when I buy them, I always ask for them in the third person: "Bill Bailey would like the Eggs Of Numbing Inevitability." I did that the other day and it answered me back, and he said to me: "No, I am Bill Bailey. You are not Bill Bailey, you are just a mere doppelgänger. I am the true Bill Bailey, in another dimension." And I went, "Oh, I hadn't planned on that." Then I thought the only way to solve this, I have to run at my doppelgänger, then we will be fused forever. So I ran full-tilt at it, and just before I got there I realised it was the highly polished side of the cheese counter.
Bill Bailey, Bewilderness, 2001
Biting the hand that feeds IT
