back to article Lesbos climax as lesbians lick Lesbians

Lesbian activists from the sun-kissed Sapphic luuurv island of Lesbos have been roundly licked in their battle to prevent gay gals dubbing themselves lesbians, the Beeb reports. The anti-lesbian Lesbians, led by Dimitris Lambrou, back in April launched a legal action against the Greek Gay and Lesbian Union (Olke) claiming that …

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  1. Matt D
    Boffin

    Capitalisation

    Excepting at the start of a sentence, surely the good folks of Lesbos can distinguish themselves from the good girl-on-girl lovers through the use of a capital or lowercase "L". Hence: Lesbian - resident of Lesbos; lesbian - woman who lurve woman.

    Problems may arise at the start of a sentence, whereupon you do what anyone else does and go by the context. Even better if you're a Lesbian lesbian.

    While we're at it, we could call welsh ones Llesbians.

  2. Scott
    Coat

    Court ruling

    As mentioned in the article and its to good to let go, they where well and truely licked.

  3. Jason Rivers
    Coat

    bootnote...

    but... what if you're a gay woman from Lesbos.... then what do you call yourself? I guess anything you want.

  4. Anon Koward
    Coat

    What?

    So El Reg isn't a lesbian online site??? When did this happen i thought all the flame wars about the JesusPhone and Global Warming were a direct result of the lesbian readership, not to mention their fixation with Paris!

    I will have to take my "straight man wanting to watch lesbians battle it out over the best OS" readership elsewhere... (Perhaps WIRED is better for this hmmm)

    /I'll grab my coat with hidden camera in it then...

  5. Edwin
    Joke

    El Reg vs. Indy

    I noticed that the Independent has modified their story and no longer refers to El Reg as a gay on-line mag. Did you get a letter of apology?

    I would like to point out, though, that while growing up in the 'merkin southwest in the mid-80s, there were certain social types ('jocks') who felt that electronics in general and computers in particular were 'gay'.

    Whether said sporty types were prophets or idiots we'll leave to the Independent's readership to decide.

  6. ShaggyDoggy
    Paris Hilton

    Both boxes

    So, gay men from Lesbos can tick both boxes on the form then ...

    Gay (X)

    Lesbian (X)

    Paris, because she always ticks both boxes

  7. Nic Brough
    Coat

    Dumb idea

    So a word goes into common usage to describe something, and the legal system supports it, instead of handing down a pointless and unenforceable ruling about how people use their own language.

    Ok, in this case, it wasn't a trademark (Hoover, Zip, Fridge etc) but the point about common usage and the evolution of language is the same.

    Of course, if they had won, then it would have opened the gates to all sorts of stupid similar cases - the one that springs to mind is the English speaking world getting the word "Gay" put back to it's original meaning. It's just not going to work. Ever.

    Good for the courts. Although I am very grateful to the Mytilenians for bringing the case - the opportunity for so... many... jokes...

    Mine's the one with the dictionary in the pocket.

  8. Tawakalna
    Paris Hilton

    aw go on go on go on go on..

    "El Reg is not a lesbian online magazine"

    I always knew that there was something missing from the Reg... :)

    Paris for the obvious regions... erm regions...

  9. Richard Hebert
    Coat

    " Our interrest "

    " Our interest in the matter is purely legal, except for a couple of the Vulture Central adsales boys, whose interest in the matter is strictly illegal."

    < ahem >

    Not to mention tickle the funny bone till all the vultures

    are in a heap , laughing their asses off so much they

    couldnt lick a stamp to save their lives .

    Which i still cant .. medics tell me ill stop laughing

    around 2010 where they will be able to try make a

    rescue attempt ..

    Good day .

    Ric

  10. James O'Shea
    Coat

    This is(n't) Sparta!

    Hmmm... A _Greek_ gentleman who has problems with grrls... Hmmm.

    I'm on my way out, no need to push...

  11. Francis Boyle Silver badge
    Happy

    illegal interest?

    I know this extreme porn thing is a bit of a worry but you're doing it tough in the UK if a man's sacred right to ogle a bit of girl/girl action is now illegal.

  12. tony baldwin
    Alert

    pass the kleenex

    I laughed so hard when I read the headline, I was in tears...

    I made a few xeroxes to post about the office.

  13. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    A political angle

    Perhaps lesbians the world over will now flock to Lesbos as the promised island, grab power, claim sovereignity, expel the natives, and seek to influence the foreign policy of the USA.

  14. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Re: Dumb idea

    @Nic Brough

    "Of course, if they had won, then it would have opened the gates to all sorts of stupid similar cases - the one that springs to mind is the English speaking world getting the word "Gay" put back to it's original meaning."

    A) There's no group of people in the UK that use the word "gay" to define themselves, apart from the obvious.

    B) Despite what the old fuddy-duddies might claim, the word "gay" has always had a sexual connotation, suggesting someone quite freely indulgent in the pleasures of the flesh. Of course, this was originally non-gender-specific.

  15. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Great headline

    Alliteration, sexual insinuation whilst staying relevant. More of this sort of thing.

  16. Matthew
    Happy

    A title is required.

    Well, dip me in honey and throw me to the lesbians!

  17. This post has been deleted by its author

  18. Alec Harkness
    Happy

    Re: €230

    €230? For this much entertainment? I've been offered worse deals...

    I say we have a whip-round and raise some cash so they can mount an appeal.

    (huh, uhu, huh, I said "mount" ... )

  19. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Re: illegal ineterest?

    >if a man's sacred right to ogle a bit of girl/girl action is now illegal.

    I think you'll find that everything is now illegal in the UK. If you ever go there don't breathe to deeply otherwise you'll be arrested for stealing air.

  20. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Like "lesbian" is somehow insulting.

    Mistaken, maybe. Funy? If you're juvenile? Insulting? Only if you're some kind of bigot could you consider it insulting.

  21. Anonymous Coward
    Happy

    Right, now that's out of the way...

    When does it become compulsory?

  22. Anonymous Coward
    IT Angle

    In a flap over nothing

    Great headline, but for those wondering about the IT angle might I suggest: Secure Socket Layer.

  23. Sam
    Coat

    How many nails in a lesbians(TM) coffin?

    None, its all tongue and groove.

    The toolbelt, ta.

  24. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    @illegal interest

    That rather depends if it's in a magazine or through a gap in next door's curtains.

  25. Raving
    Linux

    Sapphic Sophistry

    What are the philosophical implications?

  26. Malboeuf
    Happy

    Maybe I'm older than I thought....

    ...but I was under the impression that this was solved decades ago, like in the '70s. Correct me if you must, but I thought this fight had been fought and the ruling was that the gay women would use the word "lesbian" and the islanders would use the word "lesbosian".

    No confusion there, eh?

    That's choice, Sam. ...tongue and groove. Made my day.

  27. Anonymous Coward
    Coat

    RE. bootnote

    "what if you're a gay woman from Lesbos.... then what do you call yourself?"

    Stavros?

  28. amanfromMars Silver badge
    Heart

    Baby, Please don't go ....... You know I love you So

    "I will have to take my "straight man wanting to watch lesbians battle it out over the best OS" readership elsewhere... (Perhaps WIRED is better for this hmmm)" ... By Anon Koward Posted Wednesday 23rd July 2008 11:56 GMT

    Anon Koward,

    I think it would be a safe bet to imagine El Reg Readership preferring a Proliferation of Content with a Wired Parallel for Research and Recreation, rather than DeCamping Wholesale.

    There are Important Lessons for Man to Learn said a spokesman.

    Virtually Vital lamented a spokeswoman.

    "Well, dip me in honey and throw me to the lesbians!" ....By Matthew

    Posted Wednesday 23rd July 2008 13:07 GMT

    This thread is to your taste and liking, Matthew? :-) Very Popular Ladies are Lesbians and aint that the Truth.

  29. Danny
    Happy

    RE @ A political angle

    No, we have San Francisco for that.

  30. Dan
    Happy

    Brilliant...

    ...headline, and the one about tongue and groove.

  31. Steve

    @ Chris W

    ">if a man's sacred right to ogle a bit of girl/girl action is now illegal.

    I think you'll find that everything is now illegal in the UK. If you ever go there don't breathe to deeply otherwise you'll be arrested for stealing air."

    That's utter nonsense and you know it - he'll just get an Anti-Social Behaviour Order and that's only if he's forgotten his combined Oyster Card/Respiration Licence.

    Theres also an import duty on the CO2 he'll exhale as he enters the country.

  32. Anonymous Coward
    Coat

    I hear talk that..

    ...lesbians all around the world are now demanding that men known as 'Leslie' now NOT be referred to as 'Les' as this can be quite confusing in the workplace and has led to a few sticky moments...

    ...mines the one with 'Fire Fighter' on the back, as I wait for the flames.....

  33. Flocke Kroes Silver badge
    IT Angle

    The IT angle

    If Lesbians can get people to call lesbians sapphists the perhaps hackers can get clueless journalists stop writing 'hackers' when they mean 'crackers'. I thought the hacker/cracker argument was well and truly lost, but I distinctly remember Wallace did not say "We have forgotten the hackers Grommit!"

    BTW: I thought the island was called something like Λεσβοσ anyway.

  34. Adam Williamson
    Thumb Up

    jason rivers:

    "but... what if you're a gay woman from Lesbos.... then what do you call yourself? I guess anything you want."

    Adrianna Thanatopoulos, or so I've heard.

    Whoops - just set the cat among the pigeons in the local taverna!

    =)

  35. Brian
    Alert

    @El Reg vs. Indy

    "while growing up in the 'merkin"

    You grew up in a pubic wig?

  36. Hollerith

    honey won't work, Matt

    You can dip yourself in the rarest Tasmanian red clover honey, but you still won't be the belle of the, er, ball.

    A gay woman from Lesbos doesn't have to call herself anything. She can just lean against the bar and the lesbian tourists will all be buying her drinks.

    Happy days...

  37. Anonymous Coward
    Happy

    but lesbos is where lesbians started

    ... hence the name... they used to have almost all women religious/spiritual groups who would go the impressive cliffs in Lesbos and party/pray. This was around the time of the ancient greek civilisation so er what exactly is the problem here.

    (reference: some local guide when i was on holiday there. Dissappointingly I failed to see many lesbians in Lesbos, no lipstick lesbians... not even the lumberjack+doc martin ones).

    Seems to me that this guy has got fed up of all the lesbian jokes and wants the law to change history for him.

  38. Michael Miller

    Has my vote for best article title ever

    Hands down.

    amanfromMars is starting to make sense....should I just take a lie down or drink more?

  39. Dazed and Confused

    Re: when did it become compulsory?

    Right after they decide to cut human carbon emissions by 80%

    Stop breading and the problem will go away

  40. Sam

    Re; Stop breading and the problem will go away

    What's loaf got to do with it?

  41. Lee T.
    Coat

    @ Dazed and Confused

    well, yes, a halt on baked goods would lead to a useful cut of third world populations by starvation, but perhaps that was a slip of the tounge (the one covered in cinnamon thanks..)

  42. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    @Dazed and Confused

    >Stop breading and the problem will go away

    I prefer mine covered in batter.

  43. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Ging Gang Goolie Goolie Goolie

    Perhaps we can look forward to the people of Goole (Yorks), trying to get exclusive use of the word "Goolies"

  44. Ciaran McHale

    Great article title

    The author of the title is truly a cunning linguist.

  45. Axdyne
    Heart

    Embrace the Lesbians

    Nothing patches up a spat like dripping moist cash...the island should use the publicity of this farce to launch a travel program to invite lesbians to visit their adopted "homeland." A few billion in tourist dollars should smooth over any nomenclature friction. I'm getting excited just thinking about the advertising campaign.

  46. RW
    Happy

    Tsk, tsk <pulls goatee thoughtfully>

    "Please note: El Reg is not a lesbian online magazine."

    Methinks thou doth protest too much.

    Besides, "Lester" is a pretty strange name for a girly-girl. Are you sure you didn't mean "Let's 'er"? [Yes, it's a lame joke, esp. compared to the brilliant tongue and groove one.]

    Special bonus for the intellectually inclined, a quote from the great poetess Sappho (whence "sapphist"), the first known lesbian:

    "If you're squeamish, don't prod the beach rubble."

  47. Fuion
    IT Angle

    @amanfromMars

    Is ET allowed to have fun with PROMIS/LIONS ?

  48. Jean-Luc
    Paris Hilton

    Truly a missed opportunity. Or was it?

    The good folk at Lesbos should embrace their name. Think of all the opportunity marketing tourism to DINK (double income no kids) Mytilenian couples.

    While they are at it, they could also market to lager louts hoping to turn poor strayed lassies back to the true path of hetero lust (their beer bellies will no doubt help). 2 for the price of 1.

    But... maybe that was the point of going to court in the first case? They were sure to lose and look stupid but this could have just been a Trojan to raise the island's profile to Phallic proportions. Bit like Borat did for K'stan.

    OK, time for the island of Phallus to take folks to court to stop being called dicks. Good way to lure San Franciscan guys (just taking any random city) to their beaches.

    Paris, cuz she sure would look hot in a lez 2some.

  49. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Not a Lesbian website..

    I thought it would have been obvious: it's theregister.co.uk address not a theregister.com.gr.

    Must be all Greek to them.

  50. heystoopid
    Thumb Up

    So

    So will the good people of lesbos borrow the flag ship "Georgious Avaroff" and use it to repel the evil eye of those who have stolen the good name of the island in question ?

  51. Sam
    Coat

    confusion

    "Shamus, why did you try and pull that girl? I told you she was gay!"

    "Ah feck, I thought you said she was from Lisburn...."

    Already on.

  52. Ascylto

    Headline

    The headlines writers at El Reg have sunk to a new low ...

    Please renew my subscription.

  53. AJ

    Should we also rename maltesers?

    This is absolutely absurd – Next someone will be demanding a rename of maltesers .

    On a side note, I used to know two girls from Lesbos - They weren’t twins but they did lick alike.

  54. Matthew Joyce

    What's in a name?

    Lesbos wants to complain?

    Will the next court case be from Sodom? Or Troy?

  55. Mark

    Re: A political angle

    Nice place, but don't go there at the wrong time of the month...

  56. Anonymous Coward
    Coat

    let's have more couragous taunting of minorities

    This is really why I read The Register: clever innuendo, tastefully dispensed, never overdone.

    While we're at it, let's honor the glorious history of prejudice with some playful titles poking fun at gay men; after all, what is sauce for the goose is sauce for the gander. And let us not forget people of color: they all deserve the same friendly good humour that The Register showers on lesbians.

    Eagerly awaiting your next bon mot,

    I remain,

    Yours truly,

    A. Coward (Mrs.), BFD, SASE, DMSO

    Commanding Officer, H.M.S. Flamebait

  57. Daniel

    "Adrianna Thanatopoulos" ???

    that is sooooo nearly a googlewhack ...

  58. GrahamT
    Coat

    Hy Men!

    I live in Maidenhead. I demand Richard Branson stops using his Trademark company name.

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