Farnborough Airshow goes public this weekend Today is the last of the "trade days" at the Farnborough Air Show, but the event isn't over. Most of the aerospace biz types, hacks etc. are either dispersing now or have already done so (we're back at Vulture Central), but the show goes on. European subtlety from Airbus Alright Airbus, we get the message Tomorrow and …
So I take it you'll be out at the famous pottery and flower arranging fair at Fiddle-on-the-Nonney next thursday for an in depth analysis into modern ceramics techniques?
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So just why has there been a number of articles about farnborough this year? I'm not saying they've not been welcome, just seems a little odd for El-Reg is all.
Don't worry, I'm sure thousands of other venues will cover your basketweaving affair. And the "how to make a hookah out of riverbank mud" too.
Oh yeah, and just maybe, there's no Reg coverage because there isn't a *scrap* of IT, or even electron flow, in your underwater basket weaving patchouli show. Because almost all of those aircraft have complete networked computer/hardware systems under their skins, each subprocessor with many times the speed and power behind the *entire* Apollo program.
Now make up a turbo V8 powered pottery wheel (straight pipe stacks!) that'll turn a 20 foot salad bowl from the types of ceramics used to protect space vehicles from reentry heat, and then we'll see about giving your Kumbaya party some coverage!:)
Hmmm.....not much news there - the Harrier was the first plane to use vectored thrust - design on the very first vertical lift off plane started around 1957 and first flew in 1960 - coming in to service as the Harrier in 1969.
Using the vectoring in flight was pioneered during the Falkland's war when the vectored thrust was used to rapidly de-cellerate whilst in flight, making the attacking aircraft shoot past - unable to stop.
Although the front pair of nozzles blew cold air, the rear pair took the jet efflux from the Rolls Royce Pegasus engine and vectored the very hot outpourings through 90 degrees. Not sure how long the transition took but if it could be used in combat it was probably pretty fast.
Parris - because I've heard she likes a bit of vertical action
My parents' house seems to sit under the flight path of various Farnborough stuff. I saw the huge Antonov - very impressive. Also, one year, I sat on top of a block of flats in Farborough and watched from there.
Ah, but it's changed over the years. In the old days, there would always be more than a few new aircraft. These days... no, not really.
And the BBC would have a programme hosted by Raymond Baxter showing highlights.
I want seaplanes and Zeppelins and Pan-Am Clippers.
I want the manufacturers to be putting on open parties on tropical beaches.
I want RAF front-line fighters to be flying aerobatics, with their wingtips tied together by ribbons.
I want the chance to sink a few jars with Biggles, dammit! Farnborough is boring
Stu: "So just why has there been a number of articles about Farnborough this year?"
Perhaps Lewis is an aerotard indulging his inner Biggles? And having blagged his free press ticket as a Vulture hack, I suppose he feels duty-bound to report for El Reg.
I went to an airshow or two when my kids were small. It was full of fat blokes with dreadful complexions wearing anoraks, toting radio receivers and binoculars, and talking arcane jargon - they struck me as equivalent to a trainspotter crossed with Jeremy Clarkson.
'Flying Down To Rio' is more the sort of aerospace I'm interested in! Dolores del Río and Ginger Rogers in one flick dressed in great frocks and fuck-me shoes.
It was all a bit tired. I've been up on Freetards' Hill for the last three events, and it's definitely declined even in that time. I don't think there's been anything much actually new since the first time I went, and even the old favourites like the Harrier, MiG and Tornado have been dropped from the programme. I guess we can make an exception for the Vulcan but that's a special case, and even that wasn't a patch on when I saw it at Abingdon in the 80s. I simply don't get their Spitfire infatuation. The Blades were fun this year though, and the Red Arrows justified our viewing position without question. None of the paytards can say they had them passing 30-40 feet over their head, or saw the whites of the pilots' eyes.
"Many times the entire Apollo program"? Are you sure? Where do you think RISC programming came from? Obviously more money goes to Top Neddie and his cronies than you realised, since the aircraft don't carry anything much more complex than you average Sinclair Spectrum... well okay, mebbe a *teensy* bit more advanced than an 8086, but not by much.
Well, not until you get to the Bureaufighter, F-22 and F35 anyway.
Best way to see the show? Form a Joint Venture with Brutish Waste-O'-Space to make expensive egg-beaters for the Indian armed forces or tupperware tanks for the Ministry of Destruction and Department of Deference, grab a corner office with the best view over the airfield and then wait until *after* the airshow week has finished before deciding that the JV won't really work and then leave the office in a right shit state before buggering off home for a curry and a quick read of all the technical knowledge you successfully "shared" (or, rather, "acquired by technical means after it was paid for by the British taxpayer" might be a better description)... not forgetting to remove any trace of occupancy with a value more than buggered network cables (with the plugs ripped off as you couldn't be arsed to unplug them) or that is too big to fit inside a (LARGE) briefcase... like a scratched-to-buggery desk and a knackered chair.
Skull'n'crossbones coz they were the biggest firkin bunch of pirates we had to clean up after...
but seen one airshow you've seen them all. a bunch of jets looping/barrel rolls/arsing about making a racket. if you are very unlucky a bunch of biplanes doing the same sodding stall turns you've seen over and over again.
and then there's the red arrows. cool the first time, but knowing they aren't going to hit each other (otherwise it would be the two arrows or something like that) kinda kills the buzz. oh look its the diamond, now the heart and surprise, it looks like a cock (now that id go along and laugh at).
now being a geek the avionics is interesting, but staring into a powerd down cockpit is like looking into a coffin. its dead.
its just something to go to to shut the kids up for a bit. and its all the same time after time. to quote dudley moore:
'Your mother and I, we used to go along the cliff, at Westcliff, and she used to be on one side and I used to be on the other, holding your warm, wet hand, and you used to see a ship on the horizon, and you used to say "Daddy, what's that?" And I used to say, "It's a ship"'
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