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back to article Oracle beefs up container credentials with Five Guys buyout

Oracle bounced back from a disappointing Q2 with a cunning plan to ease its way into the containers/DevOps space - by quietly taking over a five person Austin-based startup called StackEngine. The database giant slipped in a filing to the SEC over the weekend announcing it had taken over StackEngine, and the share option …

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  1. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    "We are still on-target to sell and book more than $1.5bn of new SaaS and PaaS business this fiscal year,"

    Presumably they are blackmailing existing customers. I can't see with such a crappy universally Java based stack how Oracle wins any Greenfield business at all??

    1 3 Reply
    1. Anonymous Coward
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      Anonymous Coward

      ... I think you miss the point of SaaS, you pay for the service, and the underlying stack is irrelevant to the customer. Besides, IMHO, Java is inherently no better or worse than any other platform for building complex business apps. The complexity isn't in the coding or language, the complexity (and value) is in the design of the business capability that is being delivered.

      In the all major business transformations, the value to the business comes from the effectiveness and efficiency of the business process. I would hope that business owners have more to worry about than the underlying tech stack.

      1 1 Reply
      1. Anonymous Coward
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        Anonymous Coward

        "and the underlying stack is irrelevant to the customer."

        With Oracle it really isn't - you still need Java exploitware installed on your PC for most of their products.

        "Besides, IMHO, Java is inherently no better or worse than any other platform for building complex business apps"

        You obviously haven't used stuff based on .Net or HTML 5. All the crap about incompatible JRE versions and needing to patch security holes every few weeks simply goes away. It just works.

        0 1 Reply
        1. Anonymous Coward
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          Anonymous Coward

          Java is horrible, but using .NET and HTML 5 as better examples, wow.

          .NET's compatibility is slightly better, but you still need 1.1, 3.5, and 4.6.1 installed to cover all the bases. MS also has pushed out a few security fixes to .NET also.

          As for HTML 5, I think there still isn't a universal video format yet, and there has been numerous JavaScript security issues in the various browsers!

          0 0 Reply
          1. Anonymous Coward
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            Anonymous Coward

            ".NET's compatibility is slightly better, but you still need 1.1, 3.5, and 4.6.1 installed to cover all the bases."

            It's way better, and those versions are designed to coexist.

            "MS also has pushed out a few security fixes to .NET also."

            A few being the operative word.

            0 0 Reply
  2. Anonymous Coward
    Joke

    Five Guys

    Aren't they a fast food chain?

    Wonder how ordering from there will look after the Oracle buyout?

    Each meal is charged at a rate that includes the number of customers (hereby called end-user) on the given table multiplied by the time taken at said table with a surcharge for a minimum required condiments.

    Any call-outs for the waiter, regardless of reason, will be charged at a minimum rate. This can be covered by the annual service membership (limited to 2 meals and 6 call-outs).

    A basic meal includes a glass of water, a protein patty and 8 cold chips (fries). Optional extras include heated food, meat, beverages, vegetables, salad, etc will be added to your meal at an extra fee without prior notification.

    Please direct any queries at out legal department (big guy, no sense of humour, in a ill-fitting suit), please note that this will be charged at call-out rate plus our generous knuckle-duster wear and tear premium.

    5 0 Reply
    1. Anonymous Coward
      Reply Icon
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Five Guys

      Probably explains why their food's so ludicrously expensive.

      £6.75 for a burger plus another four quid for chips/fries, taking your meal to approaching £11 without coffee (#). And that's in a nominally "fast food" joint just opened in a shopping mall mid-sized Scottish town? Those are restaurant prices. Or London pseudo-artisan hipster prices.

      Better than McDonalds? At around three times the price I'd expect them to be ******* Michelin starred! Leaving aside that even McDonalds (in the UK) is overpriced for what it is to start with...

      Anyway, yeah. I knew Larry Ellison had to be behind it! I bet there'll be some secret ingredient that renders you incapable of eating other food once you've tried it, thus forcing you to buy again and again at their inflated prices and providing Oracle with a nice income stream.

      (#) £10.75 is just under US $16 (inc. tax) at current exchange rates.

      1 0 Reply
    2. Anonymous Coward
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      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Five Guys

      I did a double take when I saw that headline too. Oh you clever Reg headline baiters you :)

      0 0 Reply
      1. Kevin McMurtrie Silver badge
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        Re: Five Guys

        I'm not liking the clickbait here. I like Five Guys burgers but I'm not going to hire team of consultants to place an order.

        0 0 Reply

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