back to article Microsoft offers to PAY YOU to trade in your old computer for a Windows 10 device

Microsoft has, for a limited period only, offered to pay up to £100 to convince UK consumers to part with their old computers in exchange for a Windows 10 device. If a customer is willing to shell out at least £499 on a PC running Redmond's latest operating system, then the company said it would stump up £100 to encourage …

  1. Mikel

    Now you know how much your privacy is worth

    The OS with embedded spyware is free, and they can afford to give you this much on top. That money comes from somewhere.

    1. Stoneshop
      FAIL

      Re: Now you know how much your privacy is worth

      The OS with embedded spyware is free

      Nope. As elsewhere, the first hit is free. After the first year, you'll be required to stump up a subscription fee.

      1. Michael B.

        Re: Now you know how much your privacy is worth

        What nonsense are you peddling? There is no monthly subscription fee.

        1. KA1AXY

          Re: Now you know how much your privacy is worth

          ...Yet.

          1. Anonymous Coward
            Anonymous Coward

            Re: Now you know how much your privacy is worth

            You can probably run an Xbox One or Playstation 4 without paying a monthly fee, but you'll get a much cut-down experience.

            1. Michael Habel

              Re: Now you know how much your privacy is worth

              As long as I had basic PSN Store Access + Game Updates, which usually tended to be free anyway. Then thats more then enough for me. I don't do online BS Gaming sans Gran Turismo, but that's just for the single player events. I don't know how S0NY plan on addressing that for GT7, but if just being able to play that like I have & had with GT6 & GT5. Then S0NY can graciously shove it where the Sun don't shine.

          2. John Savard

            Re: Now you know how much your privacy is worth

            Sadly, I must agree. Since Windows 10 computers must accept updates, a subscription fee for Windows cannot be eliminated as a possibility somewhere down the road.

            1. Anonymous Coward
              Holmes

              Re: Now you know how much your privacy is worth

              Whether or not the OS core requires a direct debit to function, its apps do... and you want your WinX computer to do something... don't you?...

            2. streaky

              Re: Now you know how much your privacy is worth

              "subscription fee for Windows cannot be eliminated as a possibility somewhere down the road"

              Neither can Linux. You're making assumptions based on faulty data. One where Microsoft sees consumer desktop OS sales as part of it's revenue stream. It doesn't and it's debatable if it really ever has - and if it chooses to going forwards there is competition out there for people who don't want it.

              1. Stoneshop
                FAIL

                Re: Now you know how much your privacy is worth

                Neither can Linux.

                Linux is licensed so that it can not be non-free. Simple as that.

                There are distros that require a support fee; Red Hat is one. Fair enough; support costs money, and if you don't care for support, then use another one. Also, don't confuse a distro with 'Linux'

                1. a_yank_lurker

                  Re: Now you know how much your privacy is worth

                  And Centos and several others are Red Hat without Red Hat branding and support

            3. Destroy All Monsters Silver badge
              Trollface

              Re: Now you know how much your privacy is worth

              a subscription fee for Windows cannot be eliminated as a possibility somewhere down the road

              I think Nightcall on repeat is best as the new Windows Theme Song.

        2. Stoneshop
          Facepalm

          Re: Now you know how much your privacy is worth

          Terry Myerson, Microsoft's Executive Vice President of Operating Systems, said "Windows 10 changes the rules of the game and redefines the relationship between us and our customers". In his blog, Myerson goes on to say "with Windows 10, the experience will evolve and get even better over time. We’ll deliver new features when they’re ready, not waiting for the next major release. We think of Windows as a Service".

          And you expect these "new features" will be free to the user? That your base W10 install from today will keep running the latest and greatest software if you don't install these features? Features you'll have to pay for because, you know, they've cost money to develop and deploy; features you haven't paid for through your W7 or W8 license? That you can disable the telemetry hoohah without your system karking sooner or later, unless you pay for the option? The shareholders want a steady and predictable flow of money into Microsoft's coffers, so MS has to get money out of you not just once, but periodically. Maybe the consumer Windows stuff will be last to change to this model, but everything else is changing, or has changed.

          You're free to suffer the redefined relationship between Microsoft and their customers victims. Mine ended twenty years ago, and good riddance.

          1. Mark 85

            Re: Now you know how much your privacy is worth

            There is also "advertising" which has been mentioned on these august pages but not discussed much. I read of several people finding that the "games" packaged in Win10 have ads. Want to get rid of the ads, pay a monthly bribe...err.. stipend.

            People can scream all they want about Win10, etc. being "free!!!!" but ain't no such thing as a free lunch... TANSTAFL. They are a corporation with dollar signs for eyes and they will extract their pound of cash one way or the other. The problem is, they haven't told how they will extract that. The insight is in 3rd party SaS which boils down to ads, subscription, or a combination of those.

          2. rtb61

            Re: Now you know how much your privacy is worth

            It sure does change the relationship between M$ and it's customers. M$ has taken on the role of the proctologists and the customer is bent over waiting to get probed each and every time they use a windows 10 computer or they interact with anyone else using a windows 10 computer. They quite simply are desperate to get enough numbers out there to try a fend off a block on their windows 10 botnet.

      2. TidySweep

        Re: Now you know how much your privacy is worth

        @ Stoneshop

        No, nope. The price for an upgrade copy of Windows 10 is $0.00 USD. This is for a PERPETUAL license. A year from now they will raise the upgrade's price to probably something like $89.00 USD. Neither price, the 0.00 nor the 89.00 is a subscription price. They are one time prices on a perpetual license, not for a subscription. So, it's just a matter of timing: earlier adopters simply pay less for their perpetual license than people who decide to upgrade a year from now.

        Where does Microsoft make its money here? Well, there's a price for Windows 10 on all new systems right now already, hidden in the price of the new computer; there are secondary purchases, e.g. when someone buys a license to Office, or a subscription to Office 365; there are all manner of other software Microsoft sells that runs on Windows, premium services and so on.

        The deal on Windows 10 right now sets up a large eco-system of computers and devices running Windows 10, which in turn provides plenty of opportunities for Microsoft (and other companies).

        1. Stoneshop
          Holmes

          Re: Now you know how much your privacy is worth

          @Tidysweep

          The price for an upgrade copy of Windows 10 is $0.00 USD. This is for a PERPETUAL license.

          Where "perpetual" means "until we drop support for it, a couple of years from now". Sure, you can still use it forever after that. On a non-networked machine, with its RJ45 jack and USB sockets epoxied shut.

          But I didn't contest that. There will be add-ons and improvements not covered by your current W10 license, and at some point these add-ons will turn out to be required to run most of your software. Stuff you need to license separately. Stuff you may need to pay for, or pay to unlock all capabilities. Stuff that's add-driven unless you pay. And Microsoft won't be claiming your firstborn in payment for these add-ons, just a reasonable fee. Per add-on, AND per year. You'll be suffering the death by a thousand cuts.

  2. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    If you really - really have to run Windows 10

    Why not install it on your Macbook?

    I love the pictire of happy MS Campers. They must be cheering as their first customer of the day goes into the store.

    Perhaps their euphoria will be short lived as said punter asks...

    "can you direct me to the Apple Store please?"

    1. GrumpenKraut
      Happy

      Re: If you really - really have to run Windows 10

      > I love the picture of happy MS Campers.

      They are about to get Mac books for a bargain price!

      1. Destroy All Monsters Silver badge
        Windows

        Re: If you really - really have to run Windows 10

        That picture of paid-for spasming, "dancing" youthful beerbellys makes me rage for no particular reason and I have fantasies of going all Taxi Driver on these people's arse. I want to see the pink mist!

        Must be my age showing. Or maybe my habitude of being tortured by Microsoft while they laugh at me through addies.

        1. GrumpenKraut

          Re: If you really - really have to run Windows 10

          > Must be my age showing.

          "age" --> "sanity".

        2. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: If you really - really have to run Windows 10

          Every time I think about watching commercials while watching a show of any kind, Something like these kinds of commercials put me right out the cultural mainstream. Again.

    2. chivo243 Silver badge

      Re: If you really - really have to run Windows 10

      @AC

      This should have been this week's photo in the caption contest!

      http://www.theregister.co.uk/2015/10/16/win_6tb_western_digital_black_hard_drive/

      Don't get me wrong, a young woman doing yoga is nice to look at...

    3. Captain DaFt

      Re: If you really - really have to run Windows 10

      Most frequent request of Window's Store patrons:

      "Where's the restroom?"

      1. Matthew 3

        Re: If you really - really have to run Windows 10

        The operating system isn't called 'Window' and neither are its owners. So you don't get a 'Window's Store'.

  3. GrumpenKraut

    "Normal signs of use" image

    So it is normal to break off that stupid "Windows key" from the keyboard? Good to have that officially. Mine is the keyboard with free space between the control and alt keys.

    1. Stoneshop
      Coffee/keyboard

      Re: "Normal signs of use" image

      "Windows key"

      Unicomp, Purveyors of Damn Fine Keyboards, offers alternatives for their products.

      (icon, because their keyboards can handle that)

      1. GrumpenKraut

        Re: "Normal signs of use" image

        Thanks. Looking at their web page, I pretty much see the picture of the keyboard I am using now (and have been for more than a decade). Another maker (Key Tronic), though.

    2. Mpeler
      Paris Hilton

      Re: "Normal signs of use" image

      What about the "eni key" ?

      (Press any key to continue).....

      (Paris, still looking for the automatic cupholder on her PC)

  4. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Wow

    They really, really really want to encourage people aboard the Titanic, don't they?

    Actually, though, there's a bit of shrewdness there as well. When someone retires a laptop in favour of a new one, it is usually available to a knowledgeable relative or friend who can revitalise it with Linux. Taking out that option must help at least a little bit.

    And of course, most traded-in laptops will have their hard drives intact - free data for slurping, no dodgy telemetry updates required.

    1. VinceH
      Thumb Up

      Re: Wow

      "Actually, though, there's a bit of shrewdness there as well. When someone retires a laptop in favour of a new one, it is usually available to a knowledgeable relative or friend who can revitalise it with Linux. Taking out that option must help at least a little bit."

      Indeed - and the higher price for Apple gear is also a shrewd move: It's not because they value Apple gear higher (although I realise Kelly probably said that with tongue firmly in cheek), it's because they're offering a little more to try and get Apple-types to jump ship.

      "And of course, most traded-in laptops will have their hard drives intact - free data for slurping, no dodgy telemetry updates required."

      I was going to say that! :)

      1. MrNed
        Coffee/keyboard

        Re: Wow

        "it's because they're offering a little more to try and get Apple-types to jump ship."

        ahhahhahahahaha-hhaa-ha-ha-hohohooohoohhoo-no-no-stobbit-stobbit-no-hahaha

        [takes deep breath and composes himself]

        They expect me to jump back onto the rotten stinking edifice that I am so happy to have jumped off years ago...?! For a mere $300?!

        hahahahahaha-haaahhhaaahahoohooohhhoohohahahah-enough-no-argghh-i-cant-take-it-etc

        1. Yet Another Anonymous coward Silver badge

          Re: Wow

          "it's because they're offering a little more to try and get Apple-types to jump ship."

          It's because you can sell Macbooks - for money.

          Even the bottom end Macbook air sells for $500 refurb, you would be mad to hand over a MBP for $300

        2. PNGuinn
          Joke

          Re: Wow

          Well, killing apple users with laughter and derision will at least remove you from the market place and skew the stats a bit.

          Desperate mesures, as they say.

    2. Roland6 Silver badge

      Re: Wow

      "They really, really really want to encourage people aboard the Titanic, don't they?"

      No, no that desperate; yet:

      "The Trade-in devices you are sending in must be fully operational, undamaged and up to six years old..."

      So effectively they are still targeting Win7/8 users. So looks like no takers for my 386-based WfWg laptop...(not it's not connected to the internet because my router doesn't support 10baseT :) )

      Neither will they take an almost useless netbook:

      " Laptops and ChromeBooks must have a minimum 11.3” display."

      1. Roland6 Silver badge

        Re: Wow

        Oops! That should of been 10Base2 (BNC connected coaxial cable) and not 10BaseT (twisted pair)

        1. Oldfogey
          Paris Hilton

          Re: Wow

          You do know that you can get an adaptor for the BNC to connect it to Cat 5?

          (Never get rid of anything that still works - and how many WFW viruses are there out there?)

          I think Paris is trying to boot CPM.

        2. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: Wow

          "... SHOULD HAAAAAAAVVVVVVEEEEEE!!!!!..."

      2. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        @Roland6 - Re: Wow

        So effectively they are still targeting Win7/8 users.

        Oh yes, I think so. It isn't just about increasing Win10 numbers. They really must cut significantly into the Win7 and 8.1 numbers in order to get anything like a reasonable userbase for Windows 10.

        So in that context, they won't be coaxing you to scrap your 386.

    3. PNGuinn
      Linux

      Re: Wow

      "it is usually available to a knowledgeable relative or friend who can revitalise it with Linux."

      "It is usually available to a knowledgeable relative or friend who can make it work properly with linux - like it should have done in the first place."

      There - fixed it for you.

      At least, that's been my usual experience with ms v linux.

    4. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Wow

      As long as UEFI hasn't been set so it can ONLY run Windoze.

      http://arstechnica.com/information-technology/2015/03/windows-10-to-make-the-secure-boot-alt-os-lock-out-a-reality/

  5. john devoy

    MS are idiots

    Microsoft seem to be increasingly clueless as time goes on, there isn't much that engenders bad feeling more that a policy of giving the biggest rebates to the people with the most money. Microsoft...alienating it's customers one dumb idea at a time.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: MS are idiots

      Much as I hate M$ they are not idiots. They have worked out that the vast majority of humans are idiots and are incapable for seeing more than 1 month into the future. They are simply cashing in on stupidity. I aim to make a killing next year converting Win 10 machines to Linux when the demands for payment switches on.

      Thank you M$ you little geniuses you. xx

      1. Andy Non Silver badge

        Re: MS are idiots

        AC said "I aim to make a killing next year converting Win 10 machines to Linux when the demands for payment switches on."

        After Windows 10 trashed my dual-boot laptop I've got two concerns about buying any hardware that's had Windows 10 on it (with a view to installing Linux) :

        1. I gather that not all manufacturers are allowing access to disable the UEFI settings and are forcing the computer to allow only secure boot from a pre-defined OS specified in a database embedded in the firmware, which may make installing another OS problematic.

        2. Windows 10 messes with the firmware making the bootup process look for C:\Windows\something.exe (this latest bit of MS nastiness was talked about on El Reg a few weeks ago). Since installing Linux Mint to the aforementioned laptop, bootup fails and hangs after a few seconds (there is no drive C: ) so I need to do a soft reboot (Ctrl, Alt, Del) to get it to boot into Linux.

        Do you think these problems are surmountable? They look like a strategy to force hardware to be Microsoft Windows only. i.e. deliberately aimed at blocking (or making it difficult) to install Linux on ex-Windows 10 hardware. Thoughts?

        1. GrumpenKraut

          Re: MS are idiots

          Aaargs... I am afraid I cannot offer help here (aside from the obvious "Do not buy machines that are locked down by BIOS or other means."). Let me just say that I suffer from "shitty BIOS" right now: power up sometimes works, but mostly only starts the fans. I have to power down and up again to get the fucker booting. Power-off works mostly, when not, I have to cut mains. The BIOS is a nightmarish labyrinth of (for me) undocumented options. I wish it had an option "just be a stupid old-style BIOS". (O/S is Debian, machine is a Fujitsu Celsius W520).

          1. x 7

            Re: MS are idiots

            @ Grumpenkraut

            you said " Let me just say that I suffer from "shitty BIOS" right now: power up sometimes works, but mostly only starts the fans. I have to power down and up again to get the fucker booting. Power-off works mostly, when not, I have to cut mains. "

            You've got a f'cked motherboard. Some or all of the capacitors are u/s and aren't generating enough voltage to start the machine

            1. GrumpenKraut

              Re: MS are idiots

              Thanks for the reply. But no, the motherboard should be fine (if not, I got 5 years of warranty). I have now disabled anything (and that is, a lot of things!) in the BIOS that even remotely sounds like something clever is attempted. Now it seems that the power button does what it's supposed to: just power the fucker on.

        2. Primus Secundus Tertius

          Re: MS are idiots

          @andy non

          There are specialist programs which I have used to wipe the CMOS part of the BIOS to remove virus fragments or MSFT code.

          See http://www.ultimatebootcd.com/

        3. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: MS are idiots

          @Andy Non

          Buy new machine from John Lewis (clearance special if possible), attempt upgrade from W10 to Linux - if unsuccessful, return, rinse, and repeat...

        4. Anonymous Coward
          Anonymous Coward

          Re: MS are idiots

          Just consulted my crystal ball and M$ will be fighting several court cases in the near future. Their behaviour is criminal, hacking machines which don't belong to you is illegal. Forcing people to upgrade against their will is illegal. Forcing new terms and conditions on people who you gave no choice to reject them is illegal. If you think VW is in shit street, wait until the M$ cases start. Buy plenty of pop corn.

          1. Anonymous Coward
            Big Brother

            Re: MS are idiots

            "If you think VW is in shit street, wait until the M$ cases start"

            You seem to be forgetting that M$ has enjoyed exemption from law ever since 1999 when it became the special software dissemination branch of the U$ government in exchange for United States v. Microsoft Corp. going away.

            Nothing substantial will be done to curtail U$ strategic interests. There'll just be yet another flurry of conspicuous but ultimately inconsequential noises from Europe.

            Watch.

        5. petur

          Re: MS are idiots

          @Andy Non

          I recently upgraded a laptop from W7 to W10 to test some things(*), and the upgrade didn't even touch the bootloader, grub still fires up as usual.

          (*) the laptop is only used with linux, but I needed to check if a certain toolchain would still work on W10 for a customer.

          1. Andy Non Silver badge

            Re: MS are idiots

            @petur

            My dual-boot laptop continued to work for several weeks allowing me to boot into either Linux mint or Windows 10 as required; until one day immediately after Windows 10 did some automatic updates, from that point on it was Windows 10 only. No grub menu, straight into Windows 10 every time. I suspect that particular batch of updates contained "updates" for the firmware specific to my make/model of computer and at the same time Windows 10 re-enabled all the UEFI secure boot stuff etc. So just because Windows 10 doesn't trash your dual-boot immediately doesn't mean it won't do so at some point in the future if/when it gets around to "updating" your particular firmware.

            1. Martin Maloney
              Happy

              Re: MS are idiots

              If you dual boot in the usual way, it alters the MBR – the Master Boot Record – on your hard drive. I infer that the Windows 10 “update” “repaired” the MBR to only boot into Windows 10.

              Instead, why not look into EasyBCD?

              http://neosmart.net/

              It's free for personal and non-commercial use. (I am not in any way affiliated with the company.)

              It's a Windows program that works by replacing the standard boot loader with its own boot loader, not by altering the MBR. If you choose to uninstall it, then it restores the original boot loader.

              There are two Windows programs that I use on a daily basis for which there are not adequate Linux equivalents. Being able to choose to boot into Windows 7 or Linux Mint 17.2 makes my life work.

              It's also a good way to wean people off Windows and into Linux, by keeping Windows available as a “security blanket.”

        6. Dr Paul Taylor

          Re: MS are idiots

          I need to do a soft reboot (Ctrl, Alt, Del) to get it to boot into Linux

          Regard this minor inconvenience as a protection against theft. A thief will think the machine is broken and leave it behind, or at least be unable to read the stuff on your disk.

          When I installed Xubuntu, I completely trashed the M$ on the laptop that I'm using to type this. So when it boots it shows a blue screen with "your computer needs to be repaired". I have to hit ESC, F9 and scroll down to get to the grub startup.

          1. GrumpenKraut
            Joke

            Re: MS are idiots

            I have a similar trick: my computer just shows a black screen with a single word on it.

            login:

        7. BitDr

          Re: MS are idiots

          Back in 2012 I wrote that "UEFI is a straight-jacket dressed up as a security blanket". Looks like I was right, something that, in this case, I am not happy about.

      2. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: MS are idiots

        I like that idea and upvoted you but, as mentioned above, how long before Microsoft locks out most (all) Linux Distros with UEFI and then there's the potential fiasco being created by SystemD in the Linux world.

        I can't help but think that UEFI, Secure Compute mechanisms and SystemD have been a coordinated attack on the Linux ecosystem to more or less correspond with Windows 10. Otherwise the coincidence is staggering.

  6. Stoneshop
    Windows

    A laptop MS considers being tradeable

    can fairly easily fetch double the rebate on eBay &c.

  7. ZSn

    Germany

    Notably you still have to spend the same amount in euros however the rebate is only €100 not £100.

    1. Destroy All Monsters Silver badge

      Re: Germany

      The hand that doesn't give taketh away.

  8. Novex
    Mushroom

    NRA

    You'll have to take my Windows 7 laptop from my cold, dead hands!

    1. Andy Non Silver badge

      Re: NRA

      Likewise my Linux Mint laptop. I've already got my next new computer in sight, and it doesn't come with Windows pre-installed on it.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: NRA

        Between this obvious attempt to dragoon world+dog into the Win10 net and forced against-users'-will "upgrades" from Win7 and up, I am glad Microsoft has decided to no longer support XP if these latest shenanigans are what constitutes "support".

        Anon so the M$ ninjas won't down me and my XP. :-O

      2. Novex

        Re: NRA

        Actually, I've already installed Linux Mint to a partition on my Windows 7 laptop so it's dual boot now. I'm getting used to Mint as I type and eventually I'll remove Windows 7 from boot and just have it as a VM in Mint for one or two bits of software that just don't work under Linux (either natively or WINE).

    2. Dave K

      Re: NRA

      For me, it's not necessarily the OS that is the main concern funnily enough, as I can always replace it if necessary.

      I'm not giving up my trusty old Thinkpad mainly because neither Lenovo, HP nor Dell will sell me a laptop these days without a crap 16:9 screen, a keyboard designed for shininess instead of typing performance, and a trackpad which takes up so much of the palm wrest that I could land a plane on it.

      Sorry MS, as well as all the deserved flak you're getting for your criminal attempts to squeeze Windows 10 onto my hardware, you should also direct some of that flak towards your hardware partners for saturating the market with shoddy, cheap and uninspiring products. Why would I want to replace my laptop if it means downgrading several of the components?

    3. Michael Habel

      Re: NRA

      I'd have thought all the shifty, shady,and downright unsavory Telemetry + AdWare BS they keep trying to shove on anyone NOT foolish enough to drink the kool-aide. Would have been enough to get One to ditch Windows 7 anyway?

  9. Anonymous Coward
    Joke

    For Sale

    I can have a couple of dozen old PCs up and running by Monday, £50 each.

    You can have the OS of your choice, I have everything from Win3.1 for WorkGroups, Win95 (on 50 floppies if required!!), through Win98, 98SE, ME and early XP CDs. I might also have a Win2000 disk lurking somewhere.

    Joke, no way are you prising those precious, spyware-free OS disks from me!!!

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: For Sale

      no way are you prising those precious, spyware-free OS disks from me!!!

      Ach, but fe fill, Herr Kapellmeister!

    2. James O'Shea

      Re: For Sale

      I have some nice ISOs of every MS OS since DOS 6.1 (really...) and have valid, working, license keys for most of 'em. Older machines which can handle it have been updated to Win 7. Older machines which can't handle it are sitting in the garage next to my old Macs (anyone want a beige G3 running Jaguar?) just in case I someday need to run XP or W2K. One elderly Mac is running Yellow Dog Linux, one elderly ex-Windows machine is running Fedora.

      I may yet replace all the Win 7 machines with Macs old enough to run Mountain Lion and tell both Apple and MS where to get off. In that case, there will be a whole lot more Fedora (or maybe a different distro, it depends on what's handy and how much effort I feel like putting in) machines around here.

    3. glussier

      Re: For Sale

      Win95 original was on 13 floppies, 26 for Win95b (osr 2.1).

  10. alain williams Silver badge

    How long do I need to run MS Win 10 ?

    There does not seem to be anything that says that I cannot just wipe MS Malware^wWindows from the new machine and install Linux.

    I was tempted as my laptop battery has just died, but a working battery is needed :-(

    1. Andy Non Silver badge

      Re: How long do I need to run MS Win 10 ?

      See my post above, you *may* find it problematic installing Linux on a machine that has previously had Windows 10 on it. Something of a lottery of which manufacturers have locked down the UEFI settings and if Windows 10 has meddled with the firmware. Hence, the next computer I'm buying (direct from China) has Ubuntu pre-installed and I'm going to put Linux Mint on it. This may be a new and prosperous market for the smaller manufacturers who are prepared to sell Linux kit. This is what I'm considering:

      http://www.amazon.co.uk/Eggsnow-Aluminum-Fanless-Haswell-Computer/dp/B00XKMJO3Y/ref=sr_1_5?ie=UTF8&qid=1445091026&sr=8-5&keywords=linux+desktop

  11. Bota

    I'd love to see

    The T's and C's for this. MIcrosoft have the right to everything, but not limited to:

    - Your soul.

    Also who the hell is going to trade in a MacBook for less than what they can shift it for on Ebay? No Apple fan, but they're like the embarrassing friend over MS rapist friend.

  12. I Like Heckling Silver badge

    No Fecking Way

    MS can feck right off, I've had to constantly monitor mine and my folks PC's for sneaky updates from US pushing their crap OS. Only 2 days ago I found that updates that had been removed and hidden had been automatically installed by MS updates, and 3 times in one day I had to remove the 'optional' but automatically downloaded 3GB OS... each time it was a factionally different size and seemingly counted as a 'new' update.

    I'll stick with Win7 Pro thanks... if only for the reason that my media server is primarily used for Media centre and there simply isn't an acceptable alternative that's as reliable as the emby (used to be called Media Browser) plugin and server. I've tried others, but none can be started from the remote (I've tried all sorts of so called fixes) and none have the look, feel and flexibility.

    So feck orf MS... I was actually converted from dodgy copies of your OS into a paying customer and purchased 4 versions of Win7... But you can feck orf now. I'll stick with these until they fall over and then I'll probably get a few Roku boxes and a NAS to replace the media server (in fact I'll most likely convert the media server into a NAS, it'll be overkill I know). If I do have to have a desktop for gaming, it will be locked down and the insidious spyware will be removed, blocked and thwarted by every means possible.

    You converted me into a paying customer and now you converted me into a non paying customer again... Well done... Well done indeed.

  13. BobChip
    FAIL

    So I can get £100 each?

    There seems to be more than a faint whiff of panic coming from Microsoft. I can easily (even at home) lay my hands on a couple of old (Windows ME, one of them, if I can remember where it is) laptops and two more desktops. I'm sure I am not alone. But I'll be damned if I would waste £400 on anything made by Microsoft.

    I'd love to put £400 towards a new Linux machine - you could get a quite decent Linux homebuild with that budget - but as for trying to clean up and convert an ex Win 10 machine, no thanks.

    1. captain veg Silver badge

      Re: So I can get £100 each?

      I suspect you're out of luck with the old laptops, especially if old enough to be running ME. The offer doesn't apply to anything over 6 years. And it has to have a working battery. Contradictory?

      Even had I some qualifying kit worth less than a ton, what would prevent me from going for it would be the requirement to supply "personal details". This is just another data slurp.

      -A.

    2. Ken Hagan Gold badge

      Re: So I can get £100 each?

      That's £100 minus the cost of posting your existing machine to Microsoft and the amount of your time that it takes to do so. That makes the offer considerably less attractive to anyone with a traditional desktop or tower machine.

      1. Doctor Syntax Silver badge

        Re: So I can get £100 each?

        "That's £100 minus the cost of posting your existing machine to Microsoft and the amount of your time that it takes to do so."

        There's also the risk that they'll turn round & say it's too old or otherwise unacceptable.

  14. Dan 55 Silver badge
    Facepalm

    This offer must be for the holdouts

    Most home users will end up getting Windows 10 foisted upon them. But the holdouts, those IT-literate people who have been jumping through the hoops with registry entries, changing Windows Update settings, watching the KBs listed and hiding the GWX/telemetry updates, and doing it each month for themselves and family/friends as MS gets more and more insistent must have been doing it because they wanted to get a Windows 10 computer with a rebate. This offer is for them.

    Nope, doesn't make sense. Seems like they're starting to panic because someone's installation/sales projection on a Powerpoint slide isn't being met. Now they're just throwing shit at a fan and seeing what sticks.

    1. BobChip
      Joke

      Holdouts - throwing s**t at a fan....

      Forgive me, but shit, when thrown at a rotating fan, does not usually STICK. It is instantly, albeit democratically, distributed.

      Or are you arguing that MS produce a particularly sticky and difficult-to-get-rid-of type of shit?

      1. PNGuinn
        Devil

        Re: Holdouts - throwing s**t at a fan....

        YES - read the excellent thread.

        It's called Windows 10. Stickiest S**T ever developed.

      2. Doctor Syntax Silver badge

        Re: Holdouts - throwing s**t at a fan....

        "Or are you arguing that MS produce a particularly sticky and difficult-to-get-rid-of type of shit?"

        Or one that won't stick given Dan55's suggested demographic.

    2. Michael Habel

      Re: This offer must be for the holdouts

      Funny I'd have thought that, they were throwing the fecal matter 'round since the release of Win8.x. Its almost a shame I'm getting on a bit now. I'd almost would have loved the chance to sit in a Business 101 Class: Today's Lecture... How to run a multi-billion dollar Corporation into the ground, or how Windows 8.x, and Windows 10 destroyed MicroSofts' past dominance in the OS market, by destroying any trace of trust anyone still had for 'em.

      1. ITS Retired
        Devil

        This^^^

        It is MY COMPUTER, set up the way I want it. Micro@@#%& has no right to override what I want and my settings.

        Three time so far they have done just that by trying to get me to to install Win10. If I could get the service packs, I rather go back to XP first.

        How long till the first Class Action law suit?

        1. Michael Habel

          Re: This^^^

          Class action?! Really...

          I'm no fan of Microsoft, and sans the MicroSoft Tax, on new pre-built Machines. I kinda fail to see where a Court would entertain such an idea to be honest. Considering that Linux actually exists. Back in the day Mr. Gates might have remarked that it had the distant potential to kill Windows. That day is slowly creating up on us now. For the other freaks there's Mac OS, and Enterprise, the mass demogragic for this site should be otherwise exempt, from this BS. Of course the trust issues should remain, and if MicroSoft continues to ignore this issue, by the continual release of non descriptive updates, as they have been doing. You have to install it to know what's in it (Yes a swipe at Obamacare) only works when the Shrills are running the place. The problem is the Shrills are clearly in the minority thankfully.

  15. James O'Shea

    idiocy

    I have, in the recent past, sold five and six year old Apple iMacs for more than $450. I've sold elderly MacBook Pros for more than that. Why in God's name would I sell one to MS for less than I _know_ I can get for 'em on the open market? Yes, I sold PPC Macs for more than MS wants to give for _Intel_ Macs. I sold them to people who _know_ that they would be unable to run the latest Apple OS on 'em; this was, in fact, a selling point 'cause they didn't want to run the iOSifised more recent OSes. The last OS PPC Macs can run is Leopard. I've sold Intel Macs which were old enough to be able to run Snow Leopard to people who absolutely positively refuse to touch Lion and following, come what may. There is a small but vocal market of those who hate, hate, HATE Lion, Mountain Lion, and later and will be moved off Leopard and Snow Leopard when someone pries their older Macs out of their cold dead fingers. Old Apple kit can have a high resale value.

  16. Chas
    Unhappy

    I'm about a femtosecond away from removing Windows from all the public computers in the community centre where I volunteer as the BOFH and installing Linux Mint. Fortunately our public IT suite has more Macs than PCs, and very popular they are too. We are also actively seeking funding to switch the office machines to Macs.

    I've worked in IT for 45 years: Windows has always been an utter pain in the fecking arse to deal with since the early 80s. OS X and Linux Mint, on the other hand, are an absolute joy to work with. Our usage patterns at the centre confirm that Windows no longer offers any advantages over other platforms and we could make significant cost savings by transitioning our remaining PCs to Linux.

    Now if I could totally ditch Flash I'd be happy. Unfortunately, as we are a training centre for UKOnline, we still have to deploy Flash as the Learn My Way series of online IT courses is Flash-driven and it will probably take years before it's dragged kicking and screaming into the 21st century.

    YMMV!

    =:~)

    1. Chika
      WTF?

      I'm about a femtosecond away from removing Windows from all the public computers in the community centre where I volunteer as the BOFH and installing Linux Mint.

      You use Windows in a public area?

      Actually, that's a little unfair of me as I used to have a similar group of PCs under my watch. But honestly, a volunteer BOFH? Sounds like a contradiction in terms!

  17. Smartypantz

    Sad

    That photo makes me feel so, so sad!

    1. Mike Flugennock

      Re: Sad

      Yeah, sad's the word. Microsoft's marketing has been crass, ham-handed and tone-deaf as far back as I can remember.

      That foto reminds me of that video from a few years ago, of the dancing sales drones at a Microsoft Store in a shopping mall.

      That's MS's marketing strategy in a nutshell... nothing about specs, capabilities and such -- just a bunch of singing and dancing.

      1. Someone Else Silver badge
        Devil

        @ Mike Flugennock -- Re: Sad

        That foto reminds me of that video from a few years ago, of the dancing sales drones at a Microsoft Store in a shopping mall.

        Actually, it reminded me of the (in)famous clip of Bally gyrating that bowlfull of jelly at one of Micros~1's rah-rah sessions under his watch.

    2. nijam Silver badge

      Re: Sad

      > That photo makes me feel so, so sad!

      See the puppets dance! Look at the pretty blue shirts!

      But there's nothing beneath the surface.

  18. JR555

    Hmm. 4 black chicks, 1 white guy and 1 unknown, all a bit overweight. Now, I'm sure the famous multi-million M$ marketing-machine is not choosing these actors by mistake... so what signal are they sending here? Are they saying that mostly black people are stupid enough to buy into their $hit?

    1. Haku

      "9 things I learned about the world according to anonymous stock photo models."

      http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=stock_photos

  19. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Welcome to the new world order, either take the cash or they will wait and slurp you later or sooner (with some patches for Windows 7 that will upgrade it to have the abilities of Win 10)

    That Linux Mint installation I use is looking more and more likely to be my main operating system and Windows 7 in a VM for all but essential programs (which there are but a few these days if you know where to look and are happy to learn, though as a geek (old reference, not the beardy shoreditch it's cool to be a, or the napoleon dynamite no tech skills braindead versions) I'm guessing the majority on here actually enjoy learning all the time.

    Any trust I had in Microsoft is slowly but surely slipping away and paying people to go to Win 10 to me is an admission that something else is in play here, what that is I don't know but a software company doesn't give money away on hardware unless there is something else they are not being honest about (yes I know they do hardware and yes I know it may become a subscription model meaning more money in the long run). It seems a bit odd and I suppose it will all come out in the wash,

    You see the distant flames

    They bellow in the night

    You fight in all our names

    For what we know is right

    But when you all get Windows 10

    And cannot carry on

    Though your computer dies, la resistance lives on

    Viva la resistance.

    1. Doctor Syntax Silver badge

      "something else is in play here, what that is I don't know"

      That's easy. They want to minimise what they support. Getting everyone onto 10 ASAP is part of it. The other part is compulsory updates for consumer stuff - they know they can't get away with that with enterprise as a significant proportion will insist on testing updates.

  20. Will Godfrey Silver badge
    Happy

    Phew!

    I'm safe for now.

    6 months old laptop

    1 year old desktop

    3 year old second desktop

    all running debian (recently upgraded to jessie)

    Laptop touchpad has no driver but I regard that as an advantage. I hate the things and always use a plug-in mouse or trackball.

    1. Martin an gof Silver badge

      Re: Phew!

      6 months old laptop

      ...

      Laptop touchpad has no driver but I regard that as an advantage

      When I bought a laptop for the wife about 6 months ago I discovered that OpenSuse wouldn't work with the touchpad, which required some weird driver under Windows. On looking however, there was a BIOS setting which disabled the "enhanced" functions of the touchpad and hey-presto, OpenSuse now works perfectly with it, multi-finger gestures and all.

      That laptop came with W8 on a 500GB HDD and 2GB RAM. Before even charging the battery, the bottom was off, an SSD was in place and the RAM was upped to 4GB. I did try to find a "naked" laptop without Windows but utterly without success.

      M.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Phew!

        " I did try to find a "naked" laptop without Windows but utterly without success."

        I bought just such a laptop in the UK last year - 4-core i7, 8GB, 1920x1080 quality screen, case a bit naff. OpenSUSE installed without effort. Very fast.

        Google "pc specialist" or somesuch

        1. Martin an gof Silver badge

          Re: Phew!

          I bought just such a laptop in the UK last year - 4-core i7, 8GB, 1920x1080

          Aah, yes, well, let me be a bit more specific. I wanted a low-ish specification machine with 13" or so screen, decent battery life and under £300. It's not used for anything beefy at all; web browsing, email, word processing. Can't remember exactly the specification we ended up with but it's a 4-core Celeron and does the job admirably, though the screen isn't the best I've ever used.

          It would have been nice to save the £30 cost (or whatever) of the W8 licence but sadly, not possible.

          M.

          1. Anonymous Coward
            Anonymous Coward

            Re: Phew!

            @ Martin an gof

            They do do others, lots of them

  21. JLV
    Joke

    realistic picture of a MS retail location at least...

    Lots of staff, nary a customer to be seen...

    Now, as to Win 10 and its subscriptions, in a retail-type user context. Methink that they've been relatively clear up to now that it won't be subscription-based. And I also think that pulling the plug, at least on Windows 10 (not saying anything about successors), would probably run afoul of a number of laws, at least in some jurisdictions.

    I.e. they could easily change to sub model later. But not on something you already own and wasn't sold as being sub-based. Especially not if doing so would render your existing devices inoperable.

    Most significantly, it would be a PR disaster and MS has been trying fairly hard lately to improve its image.

    That's just my $0.02. Feel free to dislike MS all you want. I don't like them much myself, but this whole "OMG we're going to be sub-bed" stinks of FUD, to me. And, no, it doesn't mean I am gung-ho on MS or Win 10. It just means that they deserve to be judged on their actual merits and demerits. Just like everyone else.

    i.e. If you have any factual evidence about the future subscription-only-apocalypse for consumers, on Windows 10, feel free to share it.

    1. Captain DaFt

      Re: realistic picture of a MS retail location at least...

      "and wasn't sold"

      That's where the bugbear comes in isn't it? Win10 isn't being sold*, it's being given away, with T&Cs that says you agree MS can do whatever the Hell they want.

      *You can buy a machine with Win10 installed, but the OS is still "free", with the same T&Cs.

      1. Richard Plinston

        Re: realistic picture of a MS retail location at least...

        > *You can buy a machine with Win10 installed, but the OS is still "free", with the same T&Cs.

        That is not true (for any meaning of the word 'free'). OEMs pay Microsoft for the licences installed on machines and pass this on to the customers as part of the price of the computer.

        There were some restricted versions of Windows 8 'with Bing' and for small screen devices that were free to OEMs. But the 'free' Windows 10 is only for users who have already paid Microsoft for Windows 7 or 8.

      2. JLV

        Re: realistic picture of a MS retail location at least...

        I realize that. But, be serious, this would be near-entrapment, wouldn't it? "Your honor, the plaintiffs have no case as they did not purchase it. Yes, we pushed it onto them,but technically...".

        MS has spent years getting itself out of the monopoly gunsights, albeit sometimes more by means of involuntary market losses than innate good behavior. And they would do this for, what $10 a month? What kind of moron would authorize this as a CEO? The one who wants to push towards Apple and desktop Linux? Oh, they'd love to do it, if it was feasible. Subs are more lucrative. But it would be suicide. Surely you realize that.

        I don't buy that theory. This is about as clever a claim as Big Steve's "Linux is a cancer".

        And T&Cs have been invalidated before when they constituted gross abuse.

        1. werdsmith Silver badge

          Re: realistic picture of a MS retail location at least...

          @JLV you are right.

          But you are being rational and objective, but that's not fashionable on The Register discussions when Microsoft and especially Win10 are the subject.

          These articles are clickbait for Linux zealots designed to draw their disdain. Being objective in here is liking walking into a church and conducting devil-worship rituals on the altar.

          1. Doctor Syntax Silver badge

            Re: realistic picture of a MS retail location at least...

            "These articles are clickbait for Linux zealots designed to draw their disdain."

            If you actually look at the responses they seem to be clickbait for newly ex-Microsoft zealots for whom W10 has been the last straw.

            1. werdsmith Silver badge

              Re: realistic picture of a MS retail location at least...

              Yes, that often repeated anecdote.

              Like "I was constantly having to support my 92 year old grandfather with his Windows PC, but since I installed Linux for him, I have heard from him once"

              He either died, or just didn't bother using it.

              1. Anonymous Coward
                Anonymous Coward

                Re: realistic picture of a MS retail location at least...

                He suddenly passed away because he discovered SysVinit had been replaced by systemd.

  22. N2

    But

    My old computer is only 8 years old and works perfectly well, thank you.

    Why would I want your spyware riddled dung heap in exchange, even if you paid me full price for it?

    1. jelabarre59

      Re: But

      My daughter is still using a 12-year old HP ZX5000 for her schoolwork. It runs Linux Mint, and her profile automatically logs her into her school Google Docs account.

  23. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Not worth it

    I think it is more economical to sell your old computer hardware to a used hardware dealer, than to get such a measly rebate.

    And yeah, Microsoft does seem rather desperate... or rather, its OEM hardware partners. That's why they had banded together for the 'PC DOES WHAT?' ad campaign.

    1. Dan 55 Silver badge
      Mushroom

      Re: Not worth it

      The only people who will be saying "PC does what?" will be those who didn't know how to stop Windows 10 getting pushed on them and see an install dialog box that has one button - Accept.

  24. zen1

    The end of MS evolution

    It just dawned on me... Microsoft has essentially turned itself into AOL 2.0

  25. Pompous Git Silver badge

    For give-away to good home

    Four Win7 licences: 1 Pro 64 bit, 2 * Home Premium 64 bit and 1 Home Premium 32 bit.

    Mine's the coat with Mint in pocket...

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: For give-away to good home

      I may need one of those. I'm about to nuke a windows 10 machine, that was upgraded by mistake, and then "Microsoft called to help us with the machine, they told us to install some stuff and hand over our card details".

      If MS did not teach people to do anything and everything they said, con artists could not use the line to gain false compliance.

  26. Haku

    Friends don't let friends upgrade to Windows 10.

    Whenever friends ask me about Windows 10 I always do my best to gently steer them away from it, mainly because they treat me as free tech help and I just don't want to get involved with W10 until I'm practically forced to at gunpoint, to coin a phrase.

    I did try installing it on one of my laptops (on a spare drive I wiped afterwards) and just found the whole thing rather creepy, it didn't feel like I owned the machine anymore. And then there's the whole 'apps' thing, like the word "program" or "software" has been banished in favour of what new generations of mobile phone / tablet users are using.

    No. Just no.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Friends don't let friends upgrade to Windows 10.

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D2nq8DzYToE

    2. werdsmith Silver badge

      Re: Friends don't let friends upgrade to Windows 10.

      I did try installing it on one of my laptops (on a spare drive I wiped afterwards) and just found the whole thing rather creepy, it didn't feel like I owned the machine anymore. And then there's the whole 'apps' thing, like the word "program" or "software" has been banished in favour of what new generations of mobile phone / tablet users are using.

      OH THE HUMANITY!!!

  27. DeDo

    MS offer to pay me ~1/3rd of what I could get on eBay on a damp Tuesday, to jump ship for a flaky and insecure OS that I’ll have to RENT after a year?

    Where do I sign?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Who is insane enough to think MS will charge rent?

      You will not have to rent. It's a false flag. The cost is not going to be subscription. They will make more money* the same way Google does, by selling adverts.

      Oh, you'll "rent" the OS, but through "watch this video to access control panel" style creep.

      *At least in their imagination.

  28. P. Lee

    Oh my!

    I just looked at MS-AU's website and saw a Surface Book page with this at the bottom:

    >Intel® Core® i7

    >Organise and enhance photos with Adobe® Photoshop® and Lightroom®.3

    >Make music with professional grade apps.

    >Design and 3D modeling with programs like AutoCAD.3

    >Starting from $4,199.00

    Yes, you too can have an i7 *from* $4199

    I haven't seen numbers like that on a computer advert since the 80's!

    I considered upgrading my pentium m laptop but found MS' generosity doesn't appear to reach the Last Continent. I also realised that I don't need it. Sure the device would be better, snoopware or not, but all it does is sit on the back porch playing fitness videos and for that task, it is quite adequate.

    For fun I looked for comparisons; typing "DL380" into google gives me this:

    Series DL380 Gen9

    Processor Intel Xeon E5-2609v3 6-Core (1.90GHz 15MB L3 Cache)

    Second Processor slot (User upgradable)

    Memory 8GB (1x8GB) DDR4 2133MHz RDIMM, 24 DIMM slots available, 768GB (24x32GB RDIMM)

    Integrated Graphics card

    4x1G NICs

    Hot plug disk backplane

    Battery-backed disk array controller

    two external video ports

    1 HP iLO Remote Management (1Gb Dedicated), 1 Micro SD slot, Front: 1 x USB 3.0, Rear: 2 x USB 3.0, Internal (secure): 2 x USB 3.0, 4x1Gb ports shipping standard

    Warranty 3 Year Parts / 3 Year Labour / 3 Year Onsite Warranty Next Business Day

    All for $2990 - that's around $1200 less than the surface.

    Ok, different use-case, but how much does that aluminium case cost?

    1. Doctor Syntax Silver badge

      Re: Oh my!

      "all it does is sit on the back porch playing fitness videos"

      Shudder.

      If that were mine I'd upgrade it with a hammer.

  29. PNGuinn
    Go

    re "that picture"

    I've become used to elReg carefully picking stock photos that bear little or no relation to the article below.

    Are you folks running some sort of internal competition or something? Can we join in?

    This one, however breaks the mould. A group of ms employees expressing such extatic uninhibited joy can only mean one thing - None of 'em have taken the latest ms shilling. They (loyal serfs that they are) have probably just upgraded to WFWG 3.11.

  30. David Lawton

    Desperate times call for desperate measures, i see Windows 10 has yet to grab more market share than Windows XP... http://gs.statcounter.com/#os-ww-monthly-201510-201510-bar considering it was free upgrade to consumers and pushed out electronically its quite a bad response.

    Then again 10/15 years ago i would have been excited about a new Windows OS, but since i've been burned and shit on with Windows Vista, 8, and 8.1 my love for Windows has gone, i dream of a Windows OS as clean and well laid out as Windows 2000 but i doubt thats going to happen.

    My love affair is now with the Mac (and Linux too), and Apple would have to seriously screw up for that to change, but hey Microsoft managed to screw Windows so its possible. The odd thing is i would never EVER have bought a Mac 10 years ago, i would have bitched and made fun of Mac users, but even Windows 7 drives me mad now after using OS X for 4 years.

    I think the Windows 10 take up so far shows most people just don't care about Windows anymore, its just that annoying thing that breaks all the time.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      I think Windows 2000 was my favourite. Been using Linux/BSDs at home for 12(ish) years now.

  31. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Windows 10 is really good... Excited to be able to run it on new hardware... Offers like this are really useful... Days like this make me happy Microsoft invented the internet and the PC.

    1. Captain DaFt

      The above comment is really excellent if read in Gilbert Gottfried's voice! :)

  32. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    There's a bloke in our office who just has to be different (+ despised for it) and despite the rest of the office having Win 7 desktop computers he wants a laptop. This isn't the first time he's done something like this, bought a different chair a couple of years ago because he fancied a bit more comfort. So he has a word with the boss and through basically whining a hell of a lot is able to get her permission and budget for IT to supply him with a laptop. So he has the laptop a new large Dell beastie sitting on his desk a full hour before he switches it on as he had to go to a "lunch meeting" (with his girlfriend we discover). During this time someone notices that it has a Windows 8 sticker on it and we then can't wait for him to come back from his "meeting".

    When he eventually does and switches the damn thing on and he discovers to his disgust that it's Windows 8. He calmly calls IT support and asks to have win 7 put on it please, to which the reply is "No" corporate laptops are win 8. Then he discovers that it isn't touch screen either and is now really pissed off so goes to see the boss. She says he's just got to learn to live with it because she is not wasting more budget on him (she told us after work - see below). He is really unhappy but is determined not to show it, so to rub it in everyone asks how is he finding his laptop? We even invited people down from other floors for "meetings" so that they could ask him. Then the windows 10 notifications start popping up and he can see a light at the end of the tunnel. Calls IT and says he wants to upgrade to win 10 only to be told that's not corporate IT policy and he has to wait for a company wide roll out at least a year away.

    So eventually he starts asking people if they'd like to swap the benefits of a laptop over their clunky old desktop machines. No one takes him up on the offer and he now openly admits that he hates his laptop. He really hates his laptop and has since discovered that the rest of the office go out for an evening in the pub every once in a while. He's never been invited to any of these......

    1. SniperPenguin

      Wow - You guys must be so much better than he is..... Rather than make his life easier by installing

      1. Windows 7

      OR

      2.. ClassicShell

      OR

      3. A. N. Other shell replacement out specifically designed to give the User a Win7-style experience

      You basically decided to stick one to him and degrade to group bullying about the fact he could utilise the IT budget better than your "cool" gang. Perhaps you should spend your time wondering why you have a strange office policy of running two concurrent OS's based purely on whether or not its a laptop or desktop, rather than trying to give someone a hard time like some school bully.

      It's crap like this that give IT teams a bad name to the other departments. :-/

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        We went through a headcount reduction a couple of years ago shortly after this bloke was employed and the team had to lose two staff members. Because we all have the same job title, we were all up for the chop (voluntary redundancy was offered) and being a close knit team this was upsetting. Well I say all of us, all except this guy who despite doing the same job as the rest of us had unbeknownst to us demanded a different job title once he knew he had the job. So everyone except him is called into a meeting room and told that two team members are for the chop. Questions are asked as to why he's not in there with us and we find out about his different job title which is unsettling. He's not great at his job and we're behind on a project as a result so the realisation dawns that we'll be down two staff members and carrying this bloke means we'll just get even further behind.

        If he'd have had the same job title we'd have likely lost him due to LIFO and only one other team member. The boss can't do anything about it and we're stuck with this guy. As a result we missed a deadline and a bonus we were on target to get. One girl was banking on that cash to help pay for her wedding so you can imagine how she felt. When he first turned up for work we did invite him out for a drink but he said he wasn't keen on socialising with work colleagues. Not sure if he knew that this was a regular thing or not but we took his rejection as a sign.

        We're not an IT support department and don't set the IT policy which is done at corporate level in another country so you'd need to ask them about different OS choices. Not going to waste time and risk getting fired by breaking IT policy and employment terms and conditions by changing his OS to 7. You've got quite a nasty streak though suggesting that we have him install Classic Shell and getting himself into trouble that way. Even we draw the line somewhere. Staff are not allowed to install software themselves and must put all requests through the IT support department for properly licensed and audited software.

  33. Winkypop Silver badge
    FAIL

    Dear Microsoft

    It's not me, it's you.

  34. excollier

    They couldn't pay me enough

  35. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    take the deal...

    ..then ebay the Windows 10 device - some fool will buy it and you can use the proceeds to buy a Mac.

  36. hatti

    Photo caption

    Yes, we've sold one!

  37. Dillibat

    Don't do it

    They can recover all of your "private" data from these computers. The best thing to do with an old laptop is stop being cheap and smash it to bits.

    1. Alistair
      Windows

      Re: Don't do it

      cd /

      find . -type f -print0|xargs -i0 shred -zun 7 {}

      cd /

      rm -rf *

  38. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Microsucks doesn't have enough money...

    ...to pay me to upgrade to Loser10.

  39. mark 177
    Windows

    Photo

    Those in the know, please tell - is it compulsory to jump around like a complete dork if you work for Micro$oft?

    Is this part of the interview appraisal?

  40. jelabarre59

    T2x

    I have a perfectly functional ThinkPad T23, would make a great trade-in. Unfortunately, the new unit would probably be made to intentionally lock out Linux (what, you mean I was supposed to *use* the copy of MSWin10 that came on it???)

  41. jelabarre59

    Still new to me

    I'm looking at their list of machines they would consider "eligible", and I'd probably be grateful to have something that new. My daughter still uses an HP Pentium4 laptop with Linux, and it just logs into her school Google Docs account. Perfectly functional (which the corresponding MS "trade-up" probably wouldn't be).

    .

    This stinks of the same sort of BS as President Obie's "cash for clunkers" scam, where every car I had and was still using would have been too old to qualify. I might (emphasize "might") have been happy trading one of mine for one of those so-called "clunkers". Are you sure MS isn't part of the Obama administration?

  42. x 7

    I thought the trade-in deal expired at the end of December? At least that was how it was originally gazetted

POST COMMENT House rules

Not a member of The Register? Create a new account here.

  • Enter your comment

  • Add an icon

Anonymous cowards cannot choose their icon

Other stories you might like