Me too!
べーコンはどこですか? demands post-pub nosh fan
Our recent foray into the remarkable world of Hawaiian-Japanese fusion post-pub cuisine prompted some entertaining Reg reader chatter. Spam musubi on a plate Amid teary-eyed recollections of Spam fritters and pink blancmange, wit 1980's_coder delivered an inevitable but nonetheless highly agreeable verdict on Spam musubi, …
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Wednesday 22nd July 2015 09:48 GMT Alister
Re: I'd say
No, no, no...
Empirical measurements are just not good enough.
Each weighed item must be exact to 3 decimal places, and each item by size should be specified and checked with a micrometer.
For example, where "one large onion" is specified, we need to know to the nearest micro-linguine what the diameter should be...
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Wednesday 22nd July 2015 10:41 GMT Anonymous Coward
Re: I'd say
Alister I was going to say this in reply to your original question, if you can't handle the concept of a smidge I don't think you should be in the kitchen.
And as for a large onion, there is no such thing as a large onion, only the biggest you happen to have at hand. I had an uncle who grew onions in his allotment anything under 6 inches was small everything else was just an onion.
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Wednesday 22nd July 2015 11:46 GMT Alister
Re: I'd say
@Chris W
So you're trying to tell me that cooking is not an exact science then?
I need to throw away my Vernier scales and live free?
No longer should I scrutinise each carrots julienne for consistent length and width?
I should stop counting the number of baked beans in each serving?
This is all a revelation to me...
Please note that this, and my original post, may contain a soupçon of sarcasm, and a smidge of humour, possibly too small to be noticeable...
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Wednesday 22nd July 2015 14:53 GMT launcap
Re: I'd say
> For example, where "one large onion" is specified, we need to know to the nearest micro-linguine
> what the diameter should be...
And what the air-pressure[1] and ambient temperature[1] was at the time of measurement. And relative humidity[1].
Anality. It's not just a lifestyle choice.
[1] Is there a Reg unit for any of these? If not, why not? I suppose one could combine them in terms of politicians output (high-pressure hot air with lots of spittle being one Foot? Or in more modern parlance, one Farage?)
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Wednesday 22nd July 2015 12:30 GMT Michael Strorm
私は日本語が話せませんが、私は翻訳、オンライン使用することができます。また、ベーコン。
"To avoid confusion with the milliJub (or mJub), shouldn't we be referring to µJubs?"
If you weren't such a bunch of pinko commie socialist French pro-decimalites, you'd know that- like the inch- The Glorious Imperial Jub is *never* split by factors of 10 (*). The accepted form is the 1/17 of a jub, also known as a "speck". The speck is in turn made up of pi/sqrt(-14) unequally-sized "liquid groats".
The Americans also use these units, but *their* versions are slightly different. This is purely for the sake of ensuring that some $3.4 bn space probe crashes into Grimsby because there was confusion over which versions were being used.
(*) You can try, but it'll explode and destroy itself rather than betray the spirits of John Bull and the fourteenth-century German farmers he nicked the units off in the first place (before they realised they didn't want them back and decimal was actually quite a sensible idea anyway).
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Wednesday 22nd July 2015 12:44 GMT dogged
That's a chicken, cheese and bourbon and bacon jam wrap, where the wrap is not some wishy-washy tortilla, it's Serrano ham. Invented by the legend* that is Martin Cowley.
*for the ignorant, Martin is the bloke who told that pissy Scots git on Dragon's Den to go fuck himself.
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Wednesday 22nd July 2015 13:33 GMT TRT
A smidge...
is the amount you can comfortably get on the end of a standard table knife.
It is the default unit of measurement for pastes and other semi-solids which one can't actually pinch in any useful kind of a way. If one were to use the "end of a table knife" measure for granular or powdered solids, such as salt or pepper, then you'd find that a "smidge" was larger than a pinch.
I'm disappointed that the Reg Standards hasn't yet been extended into the temporal realm.
For example, the three day figure given in the instructional video should be given as "1 stockpart", the stockpart being the standard unit of time it will take to get your hands on any part, component or spare described as "held in stock".
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Biting the hand that feeds IT
