back to article 'THERE'S BEEN A MURRRDER!' Plod probe Street View 'slaying'

Edinburgh cops investigating an apparent murder caught on Google Street View were delighted to discover it was a hoax perpetrated by a couple of mechanics. A concerned citizen alerted the boys in blue that images snapped by Google's all-seeing eye in the city's Giles Street showed a man beating down another with a pick axe …

COMMENTS

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  1. Jim 48
    Holmes

    It's a good job that they had a pick-axe handle just lying around ...

    1. Vulch

      Car mechanics. They know *where* to hit a vehicle to make it work again, they just need a range of suitable hitting implements to suit the fault.

      1. James Hughes 1

        The secret of better motor mechanics...

        Get a bigger hammer.

      2. TeeCee Gold badge

        ...and if you ask for an intemised receipt for your 700 quid garage bill, it'll look like this:

        Wallop with pickaxe handle - 3.50

        Use of knowledge of where to wallop it with pickaxe handle - 696.50

    2. Velv
      Terminator

      The garage is in Leith.

      A pick axe handle is the least dangerous thing I'd expect them to have lying around ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !

  2. Goldmember
    Thumb Up

    Ha!

    Quick thinking, boys, well done.

    The best I could muster when I saw one was to pull a stupid face and wave.

  3. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Can't help thinking

    this side of the border they'd be doing time for it.

    1. Phil W

      Re: Can't help thinking

      Unlikely, as any half decent lawyer would get them off, but I could see it being taken to court.

      It would be exceedingly difficult for even the most pernicious of CPS prosecutors to successfully argue that they had committed a crime with their hastily staged murder scene, performed in front of no witnesses beside the Google car driver and his cameras who obviously didn't think there was a real murder in progress.

      What I could really see happening on this side of the border though, is the concerned citizen who reported it being prosecuted for wasting police time.

      1. Amorous Cowherder
        Facepalm

        Re: Can't help thinking

        Have a day off Phil W, take a chill pill and laugh, eh?!

      2. heyrick Silver badge

        Re: Can't help thinking

        "the concerned citizen who reported it being prosecuted for wasting police time." ... while the mechanics making the joke go directly to jail for years with no chance of parole because...

        ...examples MUST be set. People having a laugh without the required permits and debriefing? This sort of subversion must be nipped in the bud.

      3. Alan Edwards

        Re: Can't help thinking

        > It would be exceedingly difficult for even the most pernicious of CPS prosecutors to

        > successfully argue that they had committed a crime

        Especially with the "victim" stood next to them, obviously very much alive. I think CPS'd have a malicious prosecution case on their hands if that got anywhere near a court.

        If acting out a killing is a crime, the cast of The Mousetrap should be locked up on a daily basis.

  4. Arthur Jackson
    Thumb Up

    Taggart

    Murrrder that side of the border shirley

    1. Gav

      Re: Taggart

      Wrong side of that side of the border. This is Edinburgh, not Glasgow.

      1. Chris Miller

        Re: Taggart

        Aye. Rebus territory.

  5. Jamie Jones Silver badge

    Nice...

    That made me chuckle on a gloomy Wednesday morning...

  6. Arachnoid
    Joke

    Car mechanics

    Murder customer accounts all the time......there ought to be a law against it Guvner

  7. Longrod_von_Hugendong
    FAIL

    Shame on...

    The police for even bothering to investigate, like that would *actually* happen. Also the people who reported it are muppets as well </facepalm>

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Shame on...

      The police see images of a bloke lying on the floor and somebody standing over him with a pickaxe handle. They would be negligent if they did not investigate it.

      It sounds to me like they handled it proportionately. No large scale investigation, no CSI techs collecting evidence, no door to door enquiries, no closing down roads to preserve the crime scene - just a couple of uniformed coppers calling in to check everything was ok.

  8. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Nice one Lads!

    If only they had a bottle of tomato ketchup around to make it really authentic!

    A google car turned into my street in front of me two weeks ago, so once they upload the pictures there will be about 400 yards of me giving them a two fingered gesticulation..... If only I had a piece of paper and felt tip pen I could have given them a real message.

    Mind you the driver was not very pleased with me, and pulled over and wound his window down. I gave him a few words about how evil Google are, and he had a fully prepared handout to pass to me, so I am obviously not the first to challenge them.

    (and for the geeks: he had a laptop on the passenger seat, a metal " black box" on the passenger floor, and a netgear hub with 5 or 6 ports connected, cable-tied to the top of the box. The whole lot looked a bit hap-hazard, though I couldn't see in the back seats. And it was a Toyata Auris/Verso, i think)

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Nice one Lads!

      You couldn't see the TB RAID to store slurped data from open Wifi stations, of course, because that lives in the boot..

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Nice one Lads!

      netgear hub? OHO!!! So they're still doing the wireless sniffing are they? Didn't someone say they should stop that?

      1. Jamie Jones Silver badge

        Re: Nice one Lads!

        As I understand it, they are to stop sniffing data (which they claim was never their intention anyway) but they do still record MACs

        1. Soruk
          Mushroom

          Re: Nice one Lads!

          I think they use the MACs for the WiFi positioning stuff. Still, I wonder how well phone hotspots and MiFis can be used to b*gger up their positioning data...

          (Netgear also make hubs that aren't wifi enabled)

  9. Dr Dan Holdsworth

    Poor policing there...

    If you actually visit that bit of the google maps and look back at the scene then as the google car leaves, you can see the "murder victim" first move to stand up, then in the next shot the corpse is standing, striding away back to the workshop.

    Funny the police couldn't do that as well, isn't it?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Poor policing there...

      ... and when the car turns the corner he hits him over the head again.

    2. Gav

      Re: Poor policing there...

      And how do you know events happened in that sequence? You're dealing with a series of still photographs that can be viewed in any order.

  10. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Why weren't they arrested?

    Acts like this upset people, create fear, lower the standing of the area, and waste police time. All crimes in one form or another.

    If we don't clamp down hard on anti-social behaviour like this, we won't have a peaceful and harmonious society.

    I guess this just goes to show why we need more cameras on our streets. If the police had been able to go back and view that video, they would have seen the set-up and would not have need to do anything else other than issue a warning/caution.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Why weren't they arrested?

      there you are.. you're welcome

    2. DavCrav

      Re: Why weren't they arrested?

      "Acts like this [...] lower the standing of the area[...]. All crimes in one form or another."

      I don't think lowering the standing of the area is a crime, otherwise the Daily Mail would have another stick to beat immigrants with. (You see, if upstanding fellows like ourselves think that immigrants lower the standing of the area, well they must do, by definition.)

    3. Youngdog

      Re: Why weren't they arrested?

      "Acts like this upset people, create fear, lower the standing of the area"

      No they don't, no they don't - aaaand no they don't.

      "All crimes in one form or another"

      Wrong again.

      "If we don't clamp down hard on anti-social behaviour like this, we won't have a peaceful and harmonious society"

      Ah - my irony detector is tingling. I think at the suggestion that a peaceful and harmonious society is achievable through the hard clamping down on things.

      "I guess this just goes to show why we need more cameras on our streets...issue a warning/caution"

      Oh yes I get it - well done you fooled me. Very funny indeed. What a (t)wit.

      1. DiViDeD

        Re: Why weren't they arrested?

        Can anyone else hear a sort of 'WHOOSH'-ing sound?

  11. Velv
    Boffin

    So is it a murder, or a man assisting a heart attack victim?

    The Guardian had a great advert in 1986 about Point of View. Anything could have been happening.

    It would have been good if the Police had conducted a "full investigation" and asked Google for the original undoctored images so they could identify the perpetrator.

    1. JimmyPage Silver badge
      Thumb Up

      That advert

      should be required viewing at school, every year from age 5 to 18. It should also be shown daily across all channels. Oh, and all jurors should be shown it before a case starts

    2. DavCrav

      Re: So is it a murder, or a man assisting a heart attack victim?

      "So is it a murder, or a man assisting a heart attack victim? "

      With a pick-axe handle? Where did you learn first aid?

  12. Caaaptaaaain kick arse

    At least it wasn't the...

    South Street slasher</jock>

    1. Mephistro
      Thumb Up

      Re: At least it wasn't the...

      And after a long forensic study of the images, I reckon we can safely discard the Pint Sized Slasher as well. Unless both criminal and victim were midgets in a 1/2 scale car model expo.

  13. TeeCee Gold badge

    Modern policing.

    Says something that a nice photo of a crime gets the plod out of their comfy tea room like a shot, yet it doesn't occur to them that the prospect of someone having been beaten to death on the street in broad bloody daylight without them having heard a peep is in any way odd.

    Maybe if they relied on cameras less and traditional policing methods more, they wouldn't expect things like this to be possibly genuine....

  14. Tom Wood

    Virgin Media

    I found this on Street View the other day. This is outside Virgin Media's headend/depot in Leeds:

    https://maps.google.com/maps?q=seacroft+leeds&hl=en&ll=53.826635,-1.460538&spn=0.003175,0.006228&sll=37.0625,-95.677068&sspn=48.956293,102.041016&t=h&hnear=Seacroft,+West+Yorkshire,+United+Kingdom&z=18&layer=c&cbll=53.826139,-1.461179&panoid=ZpYnpZSDlgJ_R2Oudao2qA&cbp=12,57.36,,0,6.01

  15. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    I think you want this link...

    https://maps.google.com/maps?q=virgin+media+depot+seacroft+leeds&hl=en&ll=53.826141,-1.461182&spn=0.00252,0.011566&sll=53.826635,-1.460538&sspn=0.005566,0.011566&t=m&z=17&layer=c&cbll=53.826139,-1.461179&panoid=ZpYnpZSDlgJ_R2Oudao2qA&cbp=12,65.54,,0,9.18

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      He meant this

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        That'll teach him for complaining about their broadband service. Next time he'll go to Talktalk.....

      2. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        And if you zoom out slightly and move across so you can see the roof of the building, there's a nice message there for the Google satellites/aircraft too...

    2. This post has been deleted by its author

  16. Rick Giles
    Thumb Up

    I'm just stoked...

    that there is a Giles St. in Edinburgh as that is the name of my home town in IN (but pronounced the American way)...

    1. Ossi

      Re: I'm just stoked...

      You mean wrong?

    2. HippyFreetard

      Re: I'm just stoked...

      I lived in that car-park of a street for a year!

  17. Don Jefe

    2050 - The StreetView Murder Revisited

    I guarantee one of those atrocious 'historic forensics' shows will cover this one day and say it actually was a murder and they covered it up by doing it in front of a Googlecar.

    I think the mechanic should write up a narrative to that effect as well, to be read upon his passing. Just to fuck with everybody. Hilarity, or something anyway, would ensue.

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