back to article Whovians, your Doctor needs you: Take back the Day from One Direction

The Register is issuing a call to arms after learning that the jeggings-clad, floppy-haired boybanders in One Direction, who would never hurt you girl, have decided to livestream seven hours of caterwauling the word "baby" on the very day that Whovians celebrate a half-century of The Doctor. The 23rd of November marks the …

COMMENTS

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  1. Peter Simpson 1

    WTF?

    This seems like a minor "issue" with which I needn't concern myself...

    1. Jediben
      Trollface

      Re: WTF?

      Who gives a shit? :)

      1. Myvekk

        Re: WTF?

        No, that one is WGAS. It was frequently used where I used to work when talking about manglement. Along with WGAF.

    2. Wibble

      Re: WTF?

      Kind of a One Dimensional issue?

  2. alain williams Silver badge

    How much is El Reg being paid to push Who ?

    OK: I do like the show but it is just a bit of fun ... will readers of this site make a significant change to viewing figures ?

    1. Steve Knox

      Re: How much is El Reg being paid to push Who ?

      More likely Who articles are pushing El Reg readership figures. Worked on you, didn't it?

  3. Lottie

    Looks to me

    ... as though some whovians are acting just like the dreaded Directioners here.

    It's not as if the releas party thing is going to knock any who celebrations off the internet or telly or stop people celebrating is it?

    1. MrDamage Silver badge

      Re: Looks to me

      At least your typical whovian doesnt scream loud and high enough to burst your ear drum, and drive your dog mad.

      Besides, who is actually going to remember 1 Dimension in 50 years time, let alone being a fan of theirs in 50 years time?

      Anybody fancy doing some "gardening" at Simon Cowells house? I'll bring the quicklime.

  4. Anonymous Coward
    Trollface

    Events like these...

    Make me ignore both groups in their entirety. The world doesn't involve solely around either of them, but it seems both are unaware of that little fact.

    Instead it's much more important to remember the flood which happened in 1334 around the Belgian and Dutch coasts.

    Although I doubt anyone would remember that event without looking it up it is at least something real which has had much more impact than the running of a TV show or the existence of a boy-band.

    1. electricmonk
      Coat

      Re: Events like these...

      Well said. We must not forget the 679th anniversary of that fateful day. Is there a track I can download from iTunes? #givethebelgiananddutchcoastalfloodof1334backitsday

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Events like these...

      "Instead it's much more important to remember the flood which happened in 1334 around the Belgian and Dutch coasts.

      Although I doubt anyone would remember that event without looking it up"

      The Doctor remembers it well, he was there last week.

      1. pepper

        Re: Events like these...

        Lets do this! #neverforgetthebelgiananddutchcoastalfloodof1334 #givethebelgiananddutchcoastalfloodof1334backitsday

        Heck, I even signed in to tweeter to post that!

  5. Wanda Lust

    Schmarketing & manipulation of adolescents

    Simply top grade manipulation of hapless child sheeple. I don't believe, for one second, that this a mere unintended coincidence of events.

    What could be more successful in driving total idolatry for the Dr Who/1D event than creating conflict between siblings and classmates at an age where arguments rarely extend beyond, 'my (fill blank) is better, ya-boo'.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Schmarketing & manipulation of adolescents

      Repeat after me, 'Sheeple are that breed of sheep that follow APPLE. These One Direction kind are a totally different breed and should not be compared to the Apple breed.'

      Got that?

      No?

      Take 500 lines.

      Write out 500 times, 'One Direction are a pile of steaming dog poo that are MADE up to look nice.'

      Aqualung is still the best album ever made.

      1. BongoJoe

        Re: Schmarketing & manipulation of adolescents

        You were doing so well until the last paragraph.

        Mind you that line with the snot running down his nose was rather good, I have to say.

        1. HippyFreetard

          Re: Schmarketing & manipulation of adolescents

          "Do you still remember, December's foggy freeze,

          When the ice that clings onto your beard is screaming agony?

          And you snatch your rattling last breaths with deep sea diver sounds

          And the flowers bloom like madness in the spring..."

          Also, Locomotive Breath is pure rock.

      2. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Aqualung is still the best album ever made.

        See, it's easy to sneer at other peoples music. But if you do, don't follow by name checking a dreadfull prog folk nightmare from the 70s. No one likes Jethro Tull, no one. Oh yeah, some people say they do, but no one actually enjoys listening to them....

      3. Trygve Henriksen

        Re: Schmarketing & manipulation of adolescents

        What did you smoke?

        Best album ever is Vidar Busk & his True Belivers' "I Came Here To Rock"

        1. sabroni Silver badge
          Happy

          Re: best album

          Good grief! It's like listening to the conversation in a sixth form common room in the early eighties. Music didn't stop being good just because you gave up finding new stuff.

          And how up yourself do you have to be to proclaim your favourite album is the best album ever?

          Oh, hang on, I get it! This is just hilarious banter! I know, best album ever is Alphataurus by Alphataurus! (try it, just google "obscure prog rock" and pick one at random! Hillaire!)

    2. BongoJoe

      Re: Schmarketing & manipulation of adolescents

      Exactly. I remember the T Rex/Slade thing back in the 70s.

  6. Mike Wilson

    Too many tellies to worry

    In the distant past when most households had, at most, one telly, this might have caused even more teenage angst. Or a huge family row about which channel to watch. Not any more, so who give a damn?

  7. Jagged

    What's this One Direction thing? Never heard of them.

    1. Captain DaFt

      "What's this One Direction thing? Never heard of them."

      I have... wanna trade places?

  8. i like crisps
    Trollface

    Well hello ducky...

    ...would imagine that 99.9% of Dr Who fans wouldn't mind

    being trapped in the Tardis with One Direction.

    1. Merchman
      Facepalm

      Re: Well hello ducky...

      Well I was thinking it would make it easier to hit them with something blunt and heavy, but then I remembered the TARDIS is bigger on the inside.

      1. Soruk
        Mushroom

        Re: Well hello ducky...

        Hello, 1D band members and song writers.

        Since your music is somewhat creatively barren, perhaps you should take lessons in harmony. Here, let me guide you, the Eye of Harmony is this way ----->

      2. Tom 13

        Re: then I remembered the TARDIS is bigger on the inside.

        Yes, but if you were really clever and had just a bit of luck, you might be able to lead them to the lost battalion of Centaruans who are still roaming the halls, then lose them both again.

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Well hello ducky...

      Only if they could take the members of One Direction and transport them to some place on the other side of the Galaxy.

      Then come back and follow that up with transporting Simon Cowel and every other 'Boy' band and 'Girl' band to different locations around the cosmos. Let some other people/beings suffer their wailing and gyrating.

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Well hello ducky...

        Mixing my sci fi metaphors here but surely such an act would contravene the Prime Directive in interfering in other worlds and their development.

        It may also constitute a war crime...

        1. TRT Silver badge

          Re: Well hello ducky...

          To paraphrase Hot Tub Time Machine...

          "Time travel open up so many possibilities. We could prevent One Direction...(pause)"

          "Prevent One Direction doing what?"

          "...(Stare)..."

    3. Volker Hett
      Pint

      Re: Well hello ducky...

      I wouldn't mind being trapped in the Tardis but prefer Martha or even Rose over a boy band!

      Or beer!

      1. jelabarre59

        Re: Well hello ducky...

        Maybe, but I'd have taken the classic-era Sarah Jane any day....

  9. Mtech25
    Devil

    Not a DR Who Fan

    But the theme is cool and if it annoys a bunch of 1D fans so much the better.

    A side note here does any one know where the pitched street battles will be taking place so i can setup my Plank with Nail's, Heavy sticks, lead pipe, Bicycle chain stall?

    1. Adrian Jones

      Re: Not a DR Who Fan

      Nail's? Are you a greengrocer in your day job?

      1. Mtech25
        Devil

        Re: Not a DR Who Fan

        Not many people know this but Plank with Nails is in fact a cheap rip off, if you want the best quality and value for your money buy a Plank with Nail's.

        1. TRT Silver badge

          Re: Not a DR Who Fan

          Nails with a nail in it.

  10. NogginTheNog
    Go

    Just a TV show (and a boy band)!

    I've been a 'Who fan since I was a kid. Collected books, magazines, videos, DVDs, and watch the new series avidly with my family as we're all now fans. It's been some of the best TV I've even seen, but also some of the worst ("Love And Monsters"!).

    I remember The Three Doctors (10th anniversary) and The Five Doctors (20th), and I'm looking forward to the Day Of The Doctor as it's a big milestone and worth marking. But I'm also a little bit worried that it might be ruined, like some of the other series climaxes, by CGI overload and a look-at-how-clever-a-writer-I-am plot, frenziedly squeezing in way too many rushed ideas and twists into an hour or so!

    So we'll definitely be watching, but I'll also be 'behind the sofa' a bit just in case...

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Give me The Twelve Doctors or give me death

      "Frenziedly squeezing in way too many rushed ideas and twists into an hour or so!"

      It'll have some way to go before it's anywhere near as bad as the squeezing-in-way-too-many-rushed-ideas-and-twists-into-THIRTEEN-F*****G-MINUTES 30th anniversary Children in Need "special", Dimensions in Time.

      Okay, I'm very, *very* sorry I mentioned that.

    2. Lamont Cranston

      Re: Just a TV show (and a boy band)!

      What do you mean "might be ruined"? Of course it will. I'll watch it anyway, but the BBC should really issue all parents with a cheat sheet, to answer the inevitable slew of questions from any children in the vicinity.

    3. Trygve Henriksen

      Re: Just a TV show (and a boy band)!

      The Five doctors episode is crap...

      I plan to move the sofa away from the wall and watch 'The Two Doctors' on the 23.

  11. Nya

    Sign me up!

    Not so much as I'm a Who fan, ok I watch it occasionally but thats about it. But for the sole fact to tick off Simon Cowell and in the process my niece who's one of these no direction fan girls, well worth buying the track for!

  12. unitron

    So can I use PayPal for the non-iTunes version and get it to automagically turn my US money into UK money?

  13. Haku

    Sorry not interested

    But if you said there was a legitimate campaign with a real chance of getting Firefly back....

    Because frankly the tv series that Joss Whedon is currently involved in (Agents of SHIELD) is wholly underwhelming.

    1. Fibbles
      Trollface

      Re: Sorry not interested

      So, not all that different from Firefly then?

    2. Lamont Cranston

      Re: Sorry not interested

      I wanted to downvote this, but the truth is that Firefly was much better than Agents of SHIELD. Pretty sure AoS is only there to keep us attentive for the release of Avengers 2, but it's working on me and mine, anyway!

  14. Anonymous Coward
    Devil

    Surely, there is a compromise that can be reached!!

    One Direction's version of the Dr. Who theme music starts all episodes from here out?

    1. TheOtherHobbes

      Re: Surely, there is a compromise that can be reached!!

      "One Direction's version of the Dr. Who theme music starts all episodes from here out?"

      Or 1D are brutally exterminated by Daleks, and all memories of them are erased by the Silence.

      Or is that too lenient?

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Go

        Re: Surely, there is a compromise that can be reached!!

        Not a Whovian myself, so I am not sure what "the Silence" is. However, this weekend I was at the movies and I saw an ad for One Direction's "This Is Us" film (or whatever it was named).

        This was my first experience with One Direction. I have seen the clean-cut face of what I now know to be the enemy and I want to assure Whovians of my allegiance in the face of our common adversary. While I have to admit I have awakened too late to the danger that by now has undoubtedly consumed millions of European tween' lives prior committing it's cultural Pearl Harbor on America, it won't be the first time that Americans have arrived late to the game and have yet played an important part.

        If there are any brave Brits who have taken up their fathers' fathers' burden to save Western Civilization from another dark threat, let me know. I will be happy to provide some Lend Lease electric cattle prods if you need them to herd One Direction into a hopefully same-size-on-the-inside-as-the-outside police box. I'd give you a Lend Lease power drill too, but I don't want anyone punching air holes in the box.

  15. Anonymous C0ward

    The more I hear One Direction mentioned

    the more it sounds like a cult. Stop drinking the Kool-Aid.

  16. Dan 55 Silver badge
    Meh

    Having trouble deciding which is more annoying...

    ... One Generation's wailing or Murray Gold drowning the dialogue out.

  17. tirk
    Trollface

    Bronies

    Can we the MLP saddos involved in a three way fight? If so, the popcorn industry would benefit!

    1. RAMChYLD

      Re: Bronies

      The problem is, there's an overlap :/

      Honestly tho, I think those bronies are more interested in trolling and cyberbullying at facebook pages belonging to a particular TV network in the US and a particular toy manufacturer than causing trouble with the 50th Doctor Who anniversary. At least, hopefully. I don't think Season 4 of that show starts on the same weekend as the Doctor Who special, and the overlap will help alleviate things if it does. Otherwise they can get really nasty. They're already nasty towards fans of many other shows and even those who like the earlier versions of MLP :/

  18. MJI Silver badge

    I will have to set set my daughter

    onto these no direction losers.

    Mind you can;t be too bright she tried opening our front door with a sonic screwdriver but we all know they do not do wood

  19. Vociferous

    I don't think there's any overlap between Whovians and 1dimensionals.

    Or have I missed the huge 12-year-old-girl-with-poor-hearing demographic of Dr Who lovers?

    1. Lost in Cyberspace

      Re: I don't think there's any overlap between Whovians and 1dimensionals.

      There is. My girls like both. Grr

      1. Platelet
        Childcatcher

        Re: I don't think there's any overlap between Whovians and 1dimensionals.

        Then your girls will be especially happy to watch the Doctor Who After party next Saturday which will have some "surprise" gatecrashers

        http://www.bbc.co.uk/mediacentre/latestnews/2013/doctor-who-after-party.html

        1. veti Silver badge

          Re: I don't think there's any overlap between Whovians and 1dimensionals.

          What do you call 'gatecrashing' when it's announced two weeks in advance?

          I think that would be 'marketing'.

          I don't know which are the bigger whores in this story.

          1. Platelet

            Re: I don't know which are the bigger whores in this story.

            I blame the punters who bought the story

    2. jelabarre59

      Re: I don't think there's any overlap between Whovians and 1dimensionals.

      But there *are* Dr Who and My Little Pony crossovers... (look up "Doctor Hooves").

  20. Lost in Cyberspace

    Old news

    My daughter has been complaining about this for weeks.

    I got the casting vote. Who on the sky+ box downstairs, 1D recorded upstairs. She can choose which one to watch live but I ain't watching no poxy boy band over the Doctor.

  21. Stuart Halliday
    Megaphone

    No British Doctor Who fan calls themselves 'Whovians'. Only the Media who don't know any better...

  22. Paul J Turner

    Now to offend everyone...

    One Direction should make like a Pond and dry up! ;-)

  23. All names Taken
    Joke

    (marketing?)

    Whovians at el Reg = WhoRes?

    Anti-whovians or a-whovians = hooVers?

    1. TRT Silver badge

      Re: (marketing?)

      Dr Who fans who deluge Nicola Bryant with telephone calls...

      Peri-dial-whovians?

  24. Ken 16 Silver badge

    The Directioners have already threatened death and rape

    Necrophiliacs seldom receive consent so I'll allow that one

  25. countd
    Meh

    http://i1093.photobucket.com/albums/i423/asdfseph/gafom.gif

  26. HippyFreetard

    "Good, I can feel your anger..."

    Seriously, Who was brilliant right up til it went all Buffy. Ecclestone onwards, pretty meh. It's freakin' popular now, what's with that?

    Once, being a Dr Who fan meant that you were part of a secret society that saw things and went places the rest of society couldn't comprehend. Things greater than TV romance - science vs ignorance, peace vs war, the struggle of good vs evil within each of us. It was more than overproduced creepypasta with a prettyboy lead and boy-meets-girl cliché.

    (I hear Blakes 7 is being made again. It could be so cool, but I bet it won't be.)

    As for 1D, what's the thing? It's all quantum. They're only big because everybody's paying attention to them. Stop collapsing the waveform! Ignore them and they'll cease to exist...

    1. Platelet
      Alien

      Re: I hear Blakes 7 is being made again. It could be so cool, but I bet it won't be.)

      Hey they did a bang up job with the Tomorrow People reboot

  27. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    One Direction vs Fourth Dimension.

    (1D vs 4D).

    Marketing people pissing with joy...

  28. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Missed the point.

    Surely there is some market for an oestrogen monster and its pantie flinging weapon that will be unleashed on that day to be thwarted and utterly utterly destroyed by the doctor...

    Please???

  29. Lloyd

    1D????

    Who?

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