back to article Revealed: HUNGRY frosty Arctic cleft that could eat 2 Grand Canyons

A huge mega-canyon, nearly double the length of America's Grand Canyon, has been discovered beneath a mile of ice in Greenland. The canyon in a 3-D visualisation of the Greenland bedrock for the northern half of the island, looking north The canyon looks like a winding river channel and is at least 750km (466 miles) long, …

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  1. Elmer Phud
    Alert

    Cats/Pigeons

    There will now be a large (no humungus) amount of bandwidth dedicated to what part this subsurface gulley has to play in global cooling/warming etc.etc.

    Where the hell is the 'popcorn' icon?

    1. Dan Paul

      Re: Cats/Pigeons

      Elmer, looks like Jefe downvoted you for laughing about his AGW cause celeb.

  2. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Tourist Trap

    Water and Ice formed most of the earths geological features, so i guess in a few hundred thousand or millions of years time, whatever creatures inhabit an ice-free earth at that time, will stand on the edge peering into the abyss, having paid their entry fee to the national park of greenland.

    But seriously, this is just another reason why science is so exciting - you never know what is about to be discovered.

    1. Wzrd1 Silver badge

      Re: Tourist Trap

      "But seriously, this is just another reason why science is so exciting - you never know what is about to be discovered."

      Too true. One never knows what is truly there unless one looks.

      Just think of what will be discovered by this time next year!

      Why, they may even discover a trace of intelligence in politicians.

  3. InsaneLampshade

    Two Grand Canyons?

    How big is that in Olympic swimming pools?

    1. Thomas 4

      Re: Two Grand Canyons?

      According to National Park Statistics, the volume of the Grand Canyon is 4.17 trillion cubic metres. Wikipedia pegs the volume of an Olympic swimming pool at 2500 cubic metres...

      1,668,000,000 Olympic swimming pools.

    2. ukgnome
      Paris Hilton

      Re: Two Grand Canyons?

      Well, Olympic size pools measure: 50 metres long, 25 metres wide, and a minimum of 2 metres deep.

      (25m x 50m x 2m = 2,500m3; 1L = 0.001m3 so 2,500 x 1000 = 2,500,000L)

      So that would mean that 7.5e+5m divided by 25

      Of fuggedit it's about 29824 long (in OSSP) (Olympic Size Swimming Pools)

      And in some places 400 OSSP depths deep

      I think I've lost the will to continue...can anyone help

      *Paris because I now know how she feels

    3. Big-nosed Pengie

      Re: Two Grand Canyons?

      "How big is that in Olympic swimming pools?"

      Three hundred and twenty-six football fields.

  4. Mystic Megabyte
    Alien

    I wonder if they spotted the Aztec pyramid down there.

    1. Michael H.F. Wilkinson Silver badge
      Alien

      Nah, clearly Atlantean architecture, or my name isn't Von Däniken

      ....

      Hang on

    2. Promotor Fidei
      Coat

      Get your glasses on.

      It's a Starbucks,

      1. Kevin Johnston

        Re: Get your glasses on.

        but it doesn't show on google maps, maybe they have only just opened

        1. Wzrd1 Silver badge

          Re: Get your glasses on.

          "but it doesn't show on google maps, maybe they have only just opened"

          Nope, it's because the Starbucks is on a sub-surface US military installation, so Google leaves it blank. ;)

  5. Anonymous Coward
    Go

    Plus side of global warming!!

    Is that we will get to see wonders like this! Now excuse me while I go idle my SUV in the driveway....

    1. AndrueC Silver badge
      Joke

      Re: Plus side of global warming!!

      It'll have to warm up a helluva lot before we can visit it. Put yer foot down in that SUV :)

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Plus side of global warming!!

      When it is uncovered, your driveway might be covered --- by rather a lot of water. I hope you have an amphibious SUV

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Devil

        Re: Plus side of global warming!!

        I'll jack up the SUV and put a cinderblock in the gas pedal.

        As for my place being flooded, I know where I can find some nice riverfront property in Greenland....

  6. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Where the hell is Lydia?

    Well, at least we know where Skyrim went.

    http://oyster.ignimgs.com/mediawiki/apis.ign.com/the-elder-scrolls-5-skyrim/thumb/f/f3/Dragonsreach_location.bmp/468px-Dragonsreach_location.bmp.png

  7. MondoMan
    WTF?

    Come now...

    Everyone knows it's not the length that matters, it's the depth. Even given any locked-in-ice "shrinkage", this Greenland canyon is nowhere near as pleasurable as the Grand Canyon. :)

    1. Rusty 1
      Trollface

      Re: Come now...

      When you say "Grand Canyon", are you referring to that gully in the States? It's not really "Grand" any more is it? Or maybe this new canyon is the "Super massive special bigger than all others Canyon".

  8. Dan Paul
    Trollface

    Winding River Channel????

    Hmmmm, a winding river channel in a valley under a mile of glacier....... looks to me like this is ABSOLUTE evidence that global warming is NOT manmade since that much ice could not have formed, melted and re-formed within the timeline of man capable of using fire.

    For the obtuse ones out there, the valley the canyon formed within is "U' shaped and thus was formed by glacial activity. Then that glacier melted and formed the river that dug the canyon. Then the valley was filled with new glacier as we see it today.

    The sheer size and mass of the ice required is undeniable proof.

    1. Don Jefe
      FAIL

      Re: Winding River Channel????

      It way look that way to you, but the only thing this proves is that there is a previously unknown canyon there. Well that and the fact that wacko proclamations like yours on both sides that prove the whole debate should never have been introduced to those outside the scientific community.

    2. This post has been deleted by its author

      1. Dan Paul
        Devil

        Re: Winding River Channel????

        Did you ever take geology? Understand how glaciers are the only thing on this earth that gouge out "U" shaped valleys? That a river canyon that formed in a "U" shaped valley could have only formed AFTER the valley was gouged out? Missing the fact that this valley and canyon are now under a mile of ice? Do you have any understanding how long it takes for all that ice to form, melt and reform?

        Obviously not, so I must assume that you are flat earther who believes that the earth has only been around for 6,000 years and man was made in 7 days; otherwise you might be able to understand the enormous timeline involved here and the FACT that none of this could have taken place due to the actions of humankind or any of his ancestors, therefore PROVING that so called "global warming" is nothing more than natural cycles that can be no more affected by man than flies can move mountains

        And you apparently don't understand the use of that particular Icon, eh Don? But just as smart as a frigging fencepost even if you can't comprehend what must have taken place to form that valley!

        1. NomNomNom

          Re: Winding River Channel????

          I think what Dan Paul is saying is that because wildfires happened during the time of the dinosaurs, therefore all wildfires must be natural and we should release all convicted arsonists from prison immediately.

          1. Dan Paul
            Devil

            Re: Winding River Channel????

            No, you know quite well what I was saying, and that it conforms to all typical geological formation principles for valleys proposed since the 1950's. But no, you have to be a blathering douche of an AGW cultist like Jefe, the kind that get even more nonsensical when they know they are dead wrong.

            Your reply makes you look even more ignorant than you really are. In fact the only thing missing is a picture of you with your fingers in your ears saying "nyah,nyah I can't hear you".

            Sometimes the truth is just too much for people like you.

        2. ian 22
          Headmaster

          Re: Winding River Channel????

          Dan, as you seem to claim knowledge of geology, perhaps you also know a bit about plate tectonics, and that the canyon in question may have formed many millions of years ago when Greenland was in more tropical latitudes.

          Regardless, there is much to learn about this feature, which is less accessible than the surface of the Moon.

          1. Dan Paul
            Devil

            Re: Winding River Channel????

            "U" Shaped Valley=Well known established geological principle that these valleys are always formed by previous/current glacial activity; Vee shaped valley/river canyons= Always the same erosion pattern from running water. Water needs to melt to be able to form these patterns, thus there had to have been glacial ice formation, then massive melting, then new glacial ice formation. Timeline cannot be ignored as this span is far longer than man has existed.

            Greenland has been in this approximate location for more than a million years thus no chance of your tectonic hypothesis having any validity. Ice began forming on Greenland 3.5 Million years ago and this ice ONLY formed from the poles downward.

            As I said, you are all as smart as a fencepost, believing AGW on faith alone and ignoring bonafide PROOF you are wrong! The very definition of insanity!

    3. Mephistro
      Thumb Down

      Re: Winding River Channel???? (@ Dan Paul)

      "...looks to me like this is ABSOLUTE evidence that global warming is NOT manmade since that much ice could not have formed, melted and re-formed within the timeline of man capable of using fire."

      So, what you are saying is that AGW 'supporters' -a category which, by the way, includes most of the scientific community- aren't aware of the fact that Earth has gone through glacial periods before.

      Your comment is not only bullshit, it's Tesco-Value bullshit.

    4. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Winding River Channel????

      Actually, that much ice could easily have formed in the couple million years our ancestors have been using fire.

    5. Wzrd1 Silver badge

      Re: Winding River Channel????

      "For the obtuse ones out there, the valley the canyon formed within is "U' shaped and thus was formed by glacial activity."

      You got one thing right. Now, try putting the horse in front of the cart.

      A river formed a valley that was widened by the glacier grinding its way through it.

      1. Dan Paul
        Devil

        Re: Winding River Channel????

        Nice try, did you even BOTHER look at the sonar picture of the valley? The HUGE U shaped valley with the SMALL river running through it?

        No, I thought not... just another of the AGW "faithfull" (deluded fools each end everyone) who cannot see reality for their self imposed blinders of "religion".

      2. Dan Paul
        Devil

        Re: Winding River Channel????

        Except for the fact that the glacier would have wiped out any evidence of the river gorge so the horse HAS to be behind the cart where it belongs.

        IE Glacier forms U shaped valley, melted glacial water forms new river gorge, new glacier is in process of starting the process all over again.

        All of which takes place over a much longer period that man has been able to affect the climate.

    6. Gav
      Facepalm

      Re: Winding River Channel????

      Totally a strawman argument. No-one has ever suggested that climate fluctuations can only be the result of human activity.

      I'm also puzzled about your identification of a U shaped valley. Are you a geologist? And even if it was U shaped, it's already well known that there has been more than one period of glaciation, and plenty of opportunity for this valley to have gone through the process you suggest.

  9. cphi

    ' as deep in places at 800m' ?

    the Grand Canyon is over a mile deep from surrounding plains (according to Wikipedia >1800m)

  10. aallison

    Huh?

    "Boffins used thousands of kilometres of airborne radar data collected by NASA"??

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Pint

      Re: Huh?

      Sure.

      That is analogue data, and it comes by the mile or km.

      But never, ever by the pint

    2. NomNomNom

      Re: Huh?

      what do you think the chemtrails are for? they are scooping up the airbourne data and releasing dangerous chemicals in the process.

  11. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    "kilometres of airborne radar data "

    Interesting concept.

    "These new ultra-USB sticks can store 16 km (10 mi) of data! File headers require only 10 cm each!"

    1. Martin Budden Silver badge
      Coat

      Re: "kilometres of airborne radar data "

      More if your handwriting is really small.

  12. 0_Flybert_0

    more throw away claptrap

    "This area’s ice sheet contributes to sea level rise and this work can help us put current changes in context"

    why do these people though out this clap trap at the end of an otherwise interesting article ?

    The Greenland Ice thickness has increased by 2"-5mm net per year since 1992 .. seems warmer air and warmer ocean currents cause more snow to fall .. well in excess to some increased Summer melt .. so if anything .. Greenland may have a contributed a bit to the sea levels lowering in 2010-2011 .. but definitely not contributing to sea level rise .. because there is no net loss of ice sheet in Greenland for 20 years .. and we don't know the extent of loss or gain prior to 1992

    1. NomNomNom

      Re: more throw away claptrap

      The greenland ice sheet is losing mass and contributing to sea level rise, not much but that is the trend.

    2. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: more throw away claptrap

      They do it so they can get research funding.

  13. Graham Marsden
    Alien

    Have they found...

    ... a huge abandoned city of cubes and cones, though?

    Tekeli-li! Te-ke-li-li!

    1. NomNomNom

      Re: Have they found...

      I am sure in the picturre I can make out regular patterns running along those ridges..no must be my imagination.

  14. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    LOTR

    Looks rather like it was the blueprint for Mordor.

    <http://gallery.burrowowl.net/index.php?q=/post/view/10149>

  15. promytius

    mising the point

    Please stop the madness. Fire your headline writer and get a scientist in to write them for you. Anthropomorphism has no place in Science reporting. "Hungry" cleft is oxymoronic - inanimate objects (clearly identified as non-human - not always an easy call) do not have/experience/express feelings, emotions, and other human-type reactions. Clefts have no brains so they don't get to have the feelings or characteristics of humans. Valleys aren't plagued with dietary issues. It's science, not human-analogy story-telling time. Science is better understood without the humanizing getting in its way. It's not "our" universe either!

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