back to article TV gesture patent bombshell: El Reg punts tech into public domain

Gesture control to operate next-gen home electronics is the next patent battleground - so last month we asked you lot for hand movements you'd like to see protected from the lawyers as prior art. Here are the most popular, and practical, suggestions. Many of the gestures submitted were anatomically impossible, or at least …

COMMENTS

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  1. jake Silver badge
    Pint

    What about multi-gestures, Bill?

    Index & middle fingers up, palm towards reciever, thumb over outside fingers.

    Followed by index finger pointing at your empty glass & my empty glass.

    "This round's on me" works in every bar I've ever been in, on six continents ;-)

  2. LinkOfHyrule
    Paris Hilton

    You forgot the gesture that switches on "Red Hot Slutty Chicks" or whatever the porn channels are called these days. It's a well known gesture!

    Or maybe Kleenex already have the patent for that one!

    1. Steven Raith

      I think that one is probably best reserved for Cowell, too. Otherwise every time you see him on TV, you'll end up channel hopping to the naughty channels...

      1. LinkOfHyrule
        Happy

        Good point! You wouldn't want the young'uns accidentally getting an eyeful of "Angry Northern Amateur Housewives HD" during the X factor - that would be the wrong kind of X!

        1. Michael Wojcik Silver badge

          You wouldn't want the young'uns accidentally getting an eyeful of "Angry Northern Amateur Housewives HD" during the X factor

          It's better than the alternative, if the alternative is letting them watch "X Factor".

      2. MJI Silver badge

        Ughhhh!

        I feel a bit sick.

        Who wants to w**k to Somon Cowell!

        1. LinkOfHyrule
          Gimp

          Re: Ughhhh!

          Very masochistic people no doubt.

          Maybe certain of his "artists" have to do something similar too in order to further their "careers"

  3. Steve Davies 3 Silver badge
    Coat

    What about 'Shadow Rabbits'?

    giving the two 'ears' salute to all Patent Lawyers out there.

    Ok, Coat. gone.

  4. jubtastic1
    Happy

    Some more gestures

    Hand cupped behind ear - make it 1 louder.

    Hands over ears - turn it down son.

    Index finger anticlockwise - rewind my selector.

    Index finger clockwise - skip to the end (of the adverts).

    Index finger in nostril - Discovery channel.

    Salute (UK/USA/Godwin)- History channel

    Finger drawn across throat - turn it off.

    1. technos
      Thumb Up

      Re: Some more gestures

      -- Index finger in nostril - Discovery channel.

      That sounds great. I was afraid I'd have to drink my own piss. Will my thumb work?

  5. Anonymous Coward
    Devil

    The missing one

    I'm sure it wasn't an intentional omission from the test dummy design but it didn't allow for "You can shove your shit, over-priced subscription TV up your arse, Rupert".

  6. The BigYin

    I really don't like the idea of gesture TV

    How does the TV know the gesture was mean for it and you're not simply swatting away a fly?

    Facial recognition? Does it know you are focused on it?

    OK, so how do I know it isn't doing anything else with that data? Where are the safeguards for my privacy?

    Will TV start reporting when I look at the screen, what I look at etc so ads can be targeted at me even further?

    Where are the safeguards against me being further gouged by Big Media?

    "5 pairs of eyes are detected, this film is only licensed for 4 pairs of eyes at once. Please upgrade your license at www.bastards.com"

    There are none. The TV is becoming even more the agent of Big Media rather than the owner's device.

    Easily solved in on fell swoop though; mandate that the TV's OS, applications and drivers have to be GPL and user serviceable. Done.

    "Oh, but innovation blah-de-blah-de-blah..." Bullshit. Innovation explodes when there is freedom. I give you "The Internet" as one example. Imagine the uses that could be used if hackers had freedom, here is but there:

    1) TV that doesn't report back to mother (or doesn't without your express and informed consent).

    2) TV that modifies the picture and then puts it into a person's field of view (for those with certain vision issues)

    3) TV that will access any Internet service you see fit, not the OEM's walled garden.

    The privacy and security of users trumps any industry desires. Always.

    1. Naughtyhorse

      Re: I really don't like the idea of gesture TV

      Oh FFS

      bung a bit of gaffer over the lens(es) and get back to worrying about... whatever it is that worries you most.

      1. jake Silver badge

        @Naughtyhorse (was: Re: I really don't like the idea of gesture TV)

        Lack of foresight is the entire problem.

        A bit of gaffers tape ain't going to fix the flock mentality.

      2. The BigYin
        FAIL

        Re: I really don't like the idea of gesture TV

        You put gaffer tape over the lens. Beyond a power button, the TV itself has few/no controls.

        Congrats, you just bout a £1,000 paperweight.

    2. djack
      Stop

      Re: I really don't like the idea of gesture TV

      "5 pairs of eyes are detected, this film is only licensed for 4 pairs of eyes at once. Please upgrade your license at www.bastards.com"

      You are behind the curve on that one - Microsoft patented that concept last year as something that Kinect can do..

      http://www.geekwire.com/2012/microsoft-diskinect-freeloading-tv-viewers/

      1. druck Silver badge
        Happy

        Re: I really don't like the idea of gesture TV

        Two of you will have to sit very close to each other and watch the film with one eye closed.

    3. Joe K
      Trollface

      Re: I really don't like the idea of gesture TV

      "How does the TV know the gesture was mean for it and you're not simply swatting away a fly?"

      Obviously, you pick up the remote, press the "expect gesture" button, then put the remote down and perform your gesture before the timeout.

      Easy!

    4. bag o' spanners
      Devil

      Re: I really don't like the idea of gesture TV

      I'd use the cardboard box disguise to fool greedybastards.com. And straightjackets to prevent the less enthusiastic audience members from subversively channel hopping during Eggs Factorz.

    5. Frankee Llonnygog

      Re: I really don't like the idea of gesture TV

      "How does the TV know the gesture was mean for it and you're not simply swatting away a fly?"

      Easy. There's a big 'gesture control' button on the front of the TV. Just go over to the TV and hold the button down while you make your gesture.

  7. hplasm
    Happy

    Wave hands madly and-

    " Enhance 57 to 19. Track 45 left. Stop. Enhance 15 to 23. Give me a hard copy right there."

    Job done.

    1. The BigYin

      Re: Wave hands madly and-

      "I'm sorry hplasm, this media is protected by DRM and I am unable to print. Please contact www.hotnsweaty.com for a license"

  8. Dr. Mouse
    Coffee/keyboard

    "Many of the gestures submitted were anatomically impossible, or at least extremely uncomfortable, but some were worth preserving."

    Must remember not to drink coffee while reading El Reg!

  9. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    A couple more

    Hands on top of head - Tune to the next police procedural/COPS/CSI/Law and Order/NCIS/etc.

    Hand clutching chest - locate [Steptoe|Sanford] and Son.

    Index finger extended and circled around temple - Next reality TV show.

  10. Jim Lewis

    Signal to computer that you're gesturing at it

    I think the obvious answer to how will the computer know your waving is intended for it would be to define a clear signal, 'message send'.

    Something so unlikely to be within your normal gesture vocabulary that it couldn't be mistaken.

    Given the on/off symbol is a circle and a line this seems an obvious choice.

    Give the 'OK' diving sign with one hand and hold one finger up on the other, combining both to make a capital phi figure.

    Once acknowledged by a lamp switching on, (send message), the next 10 seconds whatever sign you make will be interpreted as an instruction.

    Simples.

  11. Graham Marsden
    Thumb Up

    More gestures...

    .... One palm on centre of chest, other above it, make rapid pressing motions: Find me a hospital drama.

    Finger rotated in a cirdle next to temple: I want to watch a programme like Jackass or Mr T's Craziest Fools

    Finger inserted into mouth, head bowed forward: I want to watch X-Factor, Britain's Got Talent or Big Brother

    PS [Smug Mode]Thanks for the mention :-) [/Smug Mode]

  12. Joe K

    I dont mind the fact that, for instance, Samsung is filling their tellies with patented gesture controls, as it makes it easier to know what make of telly to avoid.

    Dumb tellies forever!

  13. BeerTokens
    Thumb Down

    Accessibility

    What if you have lost your thumb in an accident? or any part of your body for that matter?

    What if two people in the room had eye patches? how much would you have to pay then.

    What would happen if you pointed the TV at a Mirror and played a vid of gestures?

    What's wrong with a remote control?

  14. Tikimon
    Devil

    I've always dreamed of this ONE use

    Point finger at TV with thumb raised, drop thumb as ye say "PEW!". The TV overlays your choice (or random) of graphic sequence. Explosions! Water balloons! Instant clown head overlay! Rabid weasel attack! THAT I would love to have.

    Otherwise, no frackin' thanks. Such things assume that ANY movement is a possible command, with weird results. Or is the goal to make sure we sit motionless and attentive while absorbing advertisements?

  15. Peter Gathercole Silver badge

    Sod all these gestures.

    Give me a voice activated TV! Say what you want done.

    Probably cheaper to implement as well (microphone, noise discrimination circuit to avoid feedback from the TV sound, Google voice recognition, job done).

    Scotty: "Computer.... Computer"

  16. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    /me slaps forehead....

    I think we all missed the most obvious and useful gesture:

    Both hands out, palms toward TV, alternating between open palm and fingers brought down to thumbs in a pinching motion:

    BOOBIES! SHOW ME BOOBIES!

  17. Steen Hive
    Devil

    Yes and no.

    I applaud El Reg for heading off lawyering scum at the pass, but still think waving your arms manically around like a demented Tourette's sufferer is a piss-poor way of controlling anything.

    1. Michael Wojcik Silver badge

      Re: Yes and no.

      think waving your arms manically around like a demented Tourette's sufferer is a piss-poor way of controlling anything

      Oh? And how do you control your orchestra, pray tell?

  18. MJI Silver badge

    TV function

    How about a logo removal option which removes those moronic pieces of crap from the screen

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