back to article Belgian army faces hairy caterpillar horde

Belgian soldiers are to be deployed in the country's forests to combat the menace of hairy caterpillars, Reuters reports. The procession caterpillars - so named because of their habit of marching in convoy - boast long toxic hairs which provoke dermatitis and respiratory problems in humans and account for around 80 per cent of …

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  1. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Bush missed this

    My god, a war Bush hasn't got his finger in, how did he miss this chance....

  2. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Imagine the headline...

    A Belgian soldier suffered horrific burns after he stopped to urinate against a tree and his little soldier was mistaken for a hairy caterpillar!

  3. Pascal Monett Silver badge

    Goodness me, flamethrowers in the Ardennes !

    They're going to burn the blighters off the trees ? Doesn't that mean that the trees will catch fire ? Or are they in pairs because one has the flamethrower and the other has the water reservoir ? Or are they doing this Vietnam-style, calling in the jets to blanket the area in napalm ? Should we retreat to our basements until the all-clear sounds ?

    I think we should be told.

  4. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Returning home

    As a belgian reader, i wonder, how will these soldiers reintegrate in daily life (of a belgian soldier) after killing so many helpless creatures? The horrors that they must have seen!

  5. Nev

    Burn them !?

    We have processioning catapillars in this neck-of-the-woods. [sic]

    They are nasty little bugger, best left alone!

    You aren't meant to just torch them as this just spreads their hairs everywhere.

    supposedly you'r meant to encase the "nest" using hairspray and then use the aerosol like a flame thrower to then burn the whole thing.

  6. lansalot

    fear them - or use them ?

    These caterpillars could come in handy in hostage situations, just send in an advance party through the air-con and wait for the terrorists to come out, gasping for their inhalers.

    If that fails, bring on the Final Solution - bees and wasps. I can see this catching on - why bother inventing robotic moths when the little buzzers are free. Show me a tough guy and I'll show you a tough guy who turns into a windmill the moment ol' stripey comes sniffing along, sticking his stinger out.*

    Wasps - nature's bovver-boys. Let's face it, the violent little bastards would probably relish the excitement anyway ? Why throw expensive grenades about when Rentokil could provide wasps-nests for a fee ?

    * unless said tough guy is a beekeeper (or wasp-keeping equivalent) - but that would be ridiculous.

  7. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Scary thought

    What if these caterpillars are just the infant stage of the Pentagon's cyborg moth army?

  8. Mike Lovell

    Illegal

    Unless those caterpillars are in military uniform they are enemy combatants and should be detained. Then you can burn and torture them whilst they're in captivity.

  9. heystoopid

    But Then Again!

    but then again do these hirsute invaders speak French , German or Flemish , that be the question?

  10. wilfred

    Appears .be MilInt misinterpreted a darpa news article...

    DefInt Misinterpreted Darpa recon?

    Posted Saturday 2nd June 2007 03:52 GMT

    Sounds like someone's military intelligence misinterpreted a news article on darpa terrorism, kinda like SS Norway in 2003... remember an AlQaeda tape that same week?

    http://remedials.org/sunklinks.html

  11. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Not so spectacular

    You should see the involvement of the Armed Forces more like an intervention of the National Guard in the US when the civil authorities cannot handle it alone anymore.

    When F and M raged through the British and Irish Isles the armed forces were helping out... no one made fun of it... Same thing

    Just a heads up

  12. Peter Darby

    I for one welcome...

    ... our new menopteran overlords

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