back to article Are you lonesome tonight, tech firms? Let our dating service fix you up

With Dell happily married to itself thanks to some money from the private equity gods, and EE having signed up a whole bunch of sugar daddies to foot its bills, what other lonely hearts of the tech biz could use a date this Valentine's Day? Mature, big-boned mobile phone firm, still with a lot to give, seeks deep-pocketed …

COMMENTS

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  1. J. Cook Silver badge
    Coffee/keyboard

    Apple? And HP?!?!?!

    Bwahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaaaaa!!! *cough* *HACK* WHEEZE*

    Well played, well played.

  2. Herby

    It was the best of time, it was the worst of times.....

    It is now.

    I suppose that Dell could be one of the lovelorn, but I don't know exactly what it is doing other than playing with itself.

  3. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    "Can Reg readers suggest a few more lonely hearts?"

    Sure, but I charge quite a bit to do that level of analysis and generation of a business case... ;)

    As for the ones I've already done the work on, well...crap, sorry, NDAs and all that...

  4. Bob Vistakin
    Devil

    Well, that's one way to spin what Microsoft did to Nokia

    "And of course, Microsoft itself might think it best to pick up the pieces of its wounded partner"

    Wounded having been raped sideways by, err, Microsoft to make it so.

  5. Denarius
    Go

    Other options

    lets see now. HP need some cash and would love to dump the ruins of EDS. Orakle buys that giving Orakle increased chance in the outsourcing space with existing contracts. If Larry could slash and burn the bloated upper ranks it might work. Remains of HP ? Actually have some good software, badly marketed but in a shrinking market and up against Open Sauce. HPUX ? probably dead. Linux, cloud, AIX and even Solaris technically better now. Hardware ? Maybe some Chinese firm. Lenova for instance.

    IBM buying any bits unlikely due to anti-trust fears.

    How about Canonical buying RedHat ? or buying MySQL from Oracle ? Given that market consolidation happens after initial flood of offerings, the non-relational database/BigTable vendors might like to team up more. EMCs buy of GreenPlum looks like a good move that is mutually beneficial. Should be room for a storage vendor such as (Nexant (sp?) and one of the non-relationals. High speed file system with data compression built in should be able to do well driving a database.

  6. GrantB
    Boffin

    Apple should ask Nokia out on a date

    I think it would be a really interesting match.

    The iPhone range sits nicely at the high end competing with SIII's of this world, but for volume in emerging markets Nokia Asha range running an iOS or ipod nano style OS would be pretty interesting expansion. Bonus would be Maps coming with Nokia (and no longer available to Android or MS) and an assortment of patents including how to make radio work..

    All for next to nothing compared with the Apple pile of cash, especially once they flick off NokiaSiemens network side. They wouldn't even have to stump up with the cash and go through with the deal - just announcing they were talking would cause some interesting reactions.

    Bigger bonus would be the anguish/chair throwing caused in Redmond, even if Apple don't seem to rate MS as a worthy competitor these days compared with Google.

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