back to article SPUDS ON A PLANE! Boeing boosts in-flight Wi-Fi with tater tech

Boeing engineers have filled an aeroplane with potatoes to improve wireless internet coverage on flights. Substituting their passengers for approximately 20,000 pounds (9,000kg) of potatoes, engineers at Boeing's Test & Evaluation Laboratory are trying to work out how best to propagate Wi-Fi signals through a busy aeroplane …

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  1. ISYS
    Coat

    Why Oh Why Oh

    did they not call it Coverage enHancing In Plane System CHIPS?

    1. wowfood

      Re: Why Oh Why Oh

      I'm tired of these mother******* spuds on this mother******* plane!

    2. Simon Round
      Happy

      Re: Why Oh Why Oh

      Or they could have called it Managed Aeronautical Signal Hazzards. or MASH for short.

      1. MrT
        Mushroom

        M*A*S*H...

        "A brave man once requested me

        to answer questions that are key

        is it to be or not to be

        and I replied 'oh why ask me?'

        Remember, we can take or leave chips if we please...

    3. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Why Oh Why Oh

      Or

      Coverage of

      Humans

      Research

      In

      Standard

      Plane

      Situation

  2. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Chips off the old block?

  3. K
    Black Helicopters

    spuds are donated to a food bank after testing

    Iradiate the poor and stop them procreating.

    Ahh very very fiendish!

    1. Tex Arcana
      Trollface

      Re: spuds are donated to a food bank after testing

      Well? How do you think the 1%ers are going to eliminate competition from us pesky great unwashed?? They can't just KILL us, yanno??

      Oh, wait...

  4. Anonymous Coward
    Happy

    Fantastic idea.

    Chips for all!

    Once the engineers have finished its off to the fryers for you my spuddy friends :)

  5. TRT Silver badge
    Alert

    Meme warning!

    Boil 'em, mash 'em, stick 'em in a stew...

  6. Mike Flugennock
    Coat

    Well, somebody's got to say it...

    I'll bet the potatoes were smarter than your average airline passenger.

    Phew, glad that's done.

  7. rhydian
    Coat

    And if the spuds start sizzling...

    They know the power's too high....

  8. TRT Silver badge
    Coat

    But it's not like they are like real airline passengers...

    real passengers take their jackets off and stow them in the overhead lockers.

  9. ISYS
    Joke

    lets call the the root nodules

    eyeSpuds and sit back and wait for the lawsuit

  10. SweDe
    Happy

    Health risk for those poor food bank participants

    Were those partially hydrogenated WiFi signals. Trans-fat? Inquiring people want to know :)

  11. Alan Esworthy

    clever backronyms?

    As long as we're trying for clever backronyms, I offer

    Aerial Unmanned Generated Radio Analytic Testing for Integrity and Noninterference

  12. Herby

    This just in...

    The spuds have been declared to be "living" and as such subject to animal research guidelines. They need to be informed and have proper consent. PETA (people eating tasty animals) has already filed a lawsuit demanding that the testing be stopped.

    On another front, it has been reported that those eating the "irradiated" leftovers might be exposed to radiation and may be entitled to compensation. Call (USA) 1-877-bad-spud toll free (of course) to get assistance in filing your claim.

  13. TheRealRoland
    Thumb Up

    New unit please!

    So instead of flying cattle-class, now we can choose to fly spud-class?

    So the weight of a passenger can now be expressed by the weight in spuds? what kind of spuds, though? Irish, Chinese, Chilean?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: New unit please!

      "what kind of spuds, though? Irish, Chinese, Chilean?"

      Given that Boeing is in Washington, likely they got the spuds from their neighbors in Idaho.

  14. Eddy Ito

    About right

    As far as home wi-fi systems are concerned we're all couch potatoes.

  15. MajorTom

    Umm

    If the testing period is now just 10 hours, why not use real people instead of potatoes? Just grab 200 loafers from around the halls of Boeing for an extra long meeting, offer donuts and unlimited coffee, no need for taters.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Umm

      - Spuds don't file lawsuits later for radiation exposure

      - They complain less

      - Spuds don't have luggage and kids that can get lost

      (etc)

  16. Anonymous Coward
    Devil

    And now.....

    You can wrap your heap in spuds instead of tinfoil.

  17. disgruntled yank

    and these would be

    coach potatoes?

    Has the Department of Home Fried Security weighed in on this yet?

    (Or are couch potatoes and home fries entirely American phenomena?)

  18. Alistair
    Coat

    Spuds on a plane?

    Serious Power Upgrade Delivers Services?

    ( The one with the Lays All Dressed)

  19. freebeerfriday

    you it's bad when...

    not only are humans being replaced by robots, but now also by potatoes.... it could be the end of civilisation as we know it.

  20. tony2heads
    Go

    Potatoes want to wifi too!

    entered on behalf of:

    King Edward

    British Queen

    Lady Balfour

    Maris Piper

    Désirée

    Nicola

    Marcy

    Belle de Fontenay

    and an Irish Cobbler

  21. grumpyoldeyore
    Coat

    Great News for the BBC TMS Crew

    This means Aggers, Boycott, Marks and co will be able to keep us updated as they fly back from England's overseas tours. After all they are common taters.

    Mine's the one with the radio tuned to 198 kHz in the pocket

  22. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Not too surprising

    Many airline passengers are about as bright as a bag of spuds.

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