back to article Slash for cash: boozers' bladders primed for Olympic pee game

British pub visitors will soon be able to 'sample' the Olympic' competitive spirit, by battling each other at the urinal in a micturation-managed game, the 100ml Dash. Captive Media - the firm behind the bladder-emptying title Clever Dick - is fitting various bars across Europe with more piss-powered action to celebrate the …

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  1. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    And be prepared to smell of urine,...

    from the splashback from pushing so much fluid out in a short period of time (look at the floor of a corporate toilet where the tile colour is black slate, you will see the scatter showing up quite nicely in the lights).

    1. McWibble

      Re: And be prepared to smell of urine,...

      ...and then there's the guy standing next to you frantically waving himself from left to right in order to get a high score.

  2. This post has been deleted by its author

  3. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    does the urinal retain a sample for doping control?

  4. G2
    Facepalm

    cheating the system

    does this thing do any sort of chemical analysis of the liquid it's subjected to?

    if not... just bring a [section of a] garden hose into the bathroom, connect one end to a water tap at the nearby sink, open the water flow and use the other end to obtain the gold pee medal :P

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Windows

      Re: cheating the system

      G2 - there's something called 'over-thinking' a situation.

      And then there's what you've just done...

  5. Steve Evans

    LMAO!

    I love the instructions... "To run pee left/right"... Given the general aiming ability of your regular pub patron, I can only assume the sale of wellies will sky-rocket and "Oiy, you pissed on my shoe!" fights to do likewise!

  6. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    You look...?

    "I usually stand proud in the urinal, smug that the only competition is that horse-hung giant from sales"

    You eye up other mens todgers in the bog?

    Pervert!

    ;-)

    1. Caleb Cox (Written by Reg staff)

      Re: You look...?

      Usain Bolt looked around to make sure he was still in first place during his Olympic dash. Just saying. ;-)

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: You look...?

        Are ou suggesting that our planets fine olympians are a bunch of dripping penises?

        You bad man Cox!

        (snigger - Cox... :-D )

  7. McWibble
    WTF?

    > players can upload their 100ml Dash scores using a smartphone...

    As long as this doesn't involve a load of pissed guys standing at urinals holding their phone in one hand and themselves in the other trying to film their latest high score.

    In fact, is there any situation where you can take a smartphone out in a toilet without looking creepy?

    1. frank ly

      Only if you've collapsed on the floor and are calling for an ambulance (or your partner/friend to come and take you home).

  8. Pete the not so great
    WTF?

    should make the

    urine test interesting

  9. Ian Ferguson
    Coffee/keyboard

    Accuracy

    Please could we have a game that encourages male pub patrons to aim steadily and accurately? The pub loos around here make me ashamed of my sex.

  10. M Gale

    So it's like one of those old Speccy/c64 games...

    ...only instead of buttons, the game developers have restored the old, and original meaning of the word "joystick".

    I wanna go.

    1. Steve Evans

      Re: So it's like one of those old Speccy/c64 games...

      IIRC, those games on the speccy and 64 used to result in many joysticks being broken.

      I don't know if I want to play a game with those risks!

  11. Mr Young
    Unhappy

    At last!

    A use for my one eyed 3D VR HUD with Laser Pointers? Sigh - wish I was into gaming sometimes...

  12. Heineken Please
    Pint

    re: Accuracy

    Yes there is a very simple device to improve ones aim. Some years ago Schipol Airport in Amsterdam had their urinals stamped with a fly in the porcelain. Since this was done there has been a marked reduction in the amount of floor mopping required. So obvious really. Never seen the same idea anywhere else though......

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: re: Accuracy

      Have seen it in numerous places. The most recent was in the Ahoy convention centre in Rotterdam.

      I think I've seen it some places outside the Netherlands as well.

  13. ADJB

    I wonder if this will have the same effect as the original "Daley Thompson's Decathlon" and result in numerous broken joysticks and wrist strains........

  14. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Screen Shots

    Um, unless my eyes deceive me, it's called the 100ml sprint...

  15. MJI Silver badge

    My main concern about toilets

    Is when they are too high.

    Not everyone has extra long legs and a short willy.

    With shortish legs and over average length means that I can't use some toilets as I have to pee slightly up hill so cannot get drained.

    So use the normal no2 toilets then.

  16. Winkypop Silver badge
    Pint

    I prefer the old fashioned analog games

    Like: Blast the fag end.

  17. SteveCo
    Coat

    Has anyone ever tried adding a dynamo to these things and generating green energy from your trip to the loo?

    Not that mine's green or anything!

  18. rossy_91
    Thumb Up

    100ml dasher

    I actually played this in Balham the other day, it was hilarious! It's amazing how accurately seemingly hammered men can aim, the men's was in good shape and there wasn't the famous 'nightclub puddle' that you find on your average Saturday night.

    Re: accuracy - the targets in the bowl are quite central so I left smelling fresh as a daisy! No splashback!

    Was way off the top of the leaderboard though so I'm going to have to save myself up for tomorrow night...

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