back to article Steve Jobs' 'private Apple spaceship' seeks public love

Apple's head bean counter has asked his company's neighbours to back plans for a new 2.8 million sq ft glass doughnut office in Cupertino, California. Chief financial officer Peter Oppenheimer sent out leaflets to locals last week asking them to support the fruity tech titan's planning application for a new gaff - called …

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  1. ItsNotMe

    Even though I disliked Boy Wonder...

    ...and am not too thrilled with his successor...the fact that the "public" won't be allowed inside is not an issue. How many corporate offices ARE open to the public anyway? Not many.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Paris Hilton

      Re: Even though I disliked Boy Wonder...

      I THINK WE SHOULD BUILD A 200 FOOT TALL STATUE OF THE GREATEST CEO THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN STEVE BALLMER IT WOULD BE TALL ENOUGH FOR THE PUBLIC TO ENJOY AS MUCH AS MICROSOFT SHAREHOLDERS WOULD DOO SO

      1. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        Re: Even though I disliked Boy Wonder...

        sounds like the Colossus of Yorba Linda Foundation

        (Illuminatus Trilogy if I recall)

    2. Alan 6

      Re: Even though I disliked Boy Wonder...

      To be fair, I think the reason that the article mentioned they're not open to the public is because the planning application emphasises the woodlands and restaurants in the plea for locals' approval.

    3. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Even though I disliked Boy Wonder...

      "How many corporate offices ARE open to the public anyway?"

      Loads of corporate buildings in New York had ground level atriums open to the public ... seem to think it may even have been a planning requirement.

      Think the argument here is that Apple are making a justification for this development the fact that they'll replace lots of tarmac with grass and trees ... but as a large portion of this is surrounded by a 4 storey office building then the difference is not exactly noticeable. If this is to be seen as a "community asset" then perhaps the community should have some access to it.

    4. The Man Who Fell To Earth Silver badge
      WTF?

      Re: Even though I disliked Boy Wonder...

      Having lived and worked in the area, I have to wonder about the traffic and employee parking. A typical parking lot design guide for office space is as follows:

      "Related to Personnel: 1 space per 1 ½ plant employees + 1 space per managerial employee + 1 space per 10 managerial employees for visitors.

      Related to Floor Area: 1 space per 1,000 sq. ft. of gross floor area for warehousing and distribution. Or 2 spaces per 1,000 sq. ft. of gross floor area used for manufacturing. Or 2.5 spaces per 1,000 sq. ft. of office area."

  2. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    an excuse to repost this:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gtuz5OmOh_M

    astounding performance

    I'm not a fan of Apple products, but Mr Jobs is astounding here

  3. jai

    Quote Reuters-rebrander Anna: Still, it will be green space that the locals won't be allowed into.

    But surely they can't wander freely around the old HP Offices that are currently there, can they? So what's the difference?

    Or is the local authorities planning on not selling the land to anyone and instead putting a local park in the place that they'd have to fund themselves?

    1. Darryl

      I think it's more a comment on Apple trying to sell this to the public and council by going on about all the green spaces and restaurants and stuff, but the reality being that no-one but Apple being able to use them.

      1. Peter Storm

        They might not be allowed in in, but the locals still get to look at it.

        Given the choice of concrete or trees, I know which I'd rather look at.

        1. tgm
          Joke

          "...but the locals still get to look at it."

          Exactly, isn't that what Apple's all about? Creating stuff that's nice to look at, and *then* thinking about how it will be used?

      2. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        what, the 13,000 local employees don't count?

        Isn't green space that 13,000 locals get to enjoy better than unused office buildings with no green space? And all of the locals will benefit from the business taxes.

    2. Ted Treen
      Pint

      "...Reuters-rebrander Anna..."

      Appropriate, perceptive and so beautifully barbed.

      Jai, I take my hat off to you.

      Pint? - your phrase is worth it.

  4. Ryan 7
    Happy

    "Foxconn-rebrander"

    I think my life is complete.

    1. jai

      Re: "Foxconn-rebrander"

      really? this is the first El Reg article about Apple that you've read in the last 6 months is it?

      1. MD Rackham

        Re: "Foxconn-rebrander"

        And it remains as lazy as it was the first time.

        Complain about Apple's policies, products, and pricing as much as you like, but the fact that they use contract manufacturing for their designs doesn't really set them apart from any other high-tech company.

        If the Reg really needs the clicks brought on by Apple-bashing, at least assign someone with some creativity to the job. Like maybe Lewis Page. He just makes up a lot of what he writes, so he's clearly a creative guy.

        1. Anonymous Dutch Coward

          Re: "Foxconn-rebrander"

          The fact that they all do it still makes it a juicy target in my book... especially if your product is seen as exclusive, perhaps due to the high markup eehm price.

          Nice barb at Lewis there at the end.

          1. Ted Treen
            FAIL

            Re: "Foxconn-rebrander"

            Jai's comment earlier "... Reuters-rebrander Anna..." almost required me to get a new keyboard.

            There is so much anti-Apple invective, diatribes and downright childish name-calling which is served up as serious journalism by El Reg. I know you guys have had some history with Cupertino, but you're in danger of drowning in bile & sour grapes.

  5. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    As reported yesterday by other sites...

    Wouldn't it be easier just publishing the links that you're cribbing from? As things stand, no real analysis is being offered anyway and we're getting the news 12-24 hours after other sites have reported the stories.

    1. diodesign (Written by Reg staff) Silver badge

      Re: As reported yesterday by other sites...

      Dear coward,

      I guess you didn't see the two links in the article?

      C.

      1. Seanie Ryan
        Linux

        Re: As reported yesterday by other sites...

        Dear C. (too cowardly to use your name??)

        I think he meant this Birdy News Site not bothering to fill web space with essentially copy and paste material and just provide the link to the original article.

        And please, the constant referring to someone as a re-brander.... for gods sake get a new joke. Really. its old. We get it (although i never really understood it as most companies have to have suppliers. Its not like Foxconn designed the product or suppled the OS. )

        Seanie

        1. Nanki Poo
          Pint

          Re: As reported yesterday by other sites...

          I think some people may need to read up on the whole l'Apple - el Reg relationship thing . . .

          ;)

          nK

          1. Anonymous Coward
            Anonymous Coward

            @Naki Poo

            Hee, well there is that! However, Apple reporting by El Reg I considered for a long time to be very good – perceptive with a delightful dash of irrelevance and it used to wear Apple’s refusal for press passes as a badge of honour. These days, a lot of it is filler, sadly… and a pretty poor standard of filler too.

          2. Seanie Ryan
            Mushroom

            Re: As reported yesterday by other sites...

            @Nanki Poo

            Been following this Birdy News Site's history with Apple for many years now, so no need to read up.

            Its just that Reg were once able to come up with witty one-liners (and not just for Apple) that made me laugh too.

            But now, the lines are just the same day in day out. Foxconn rebrander made me laugh to, until i read it for the 1000th time. And the irony is that in that time, Reg Reporting has gone into the drink so that they are really just themselves a rebrander of news from other sites.

            I used to like the Reg for their ability to add humour and provide a satirical opinion on tech/corporate affairs, but now it like watching a stand-up comic use the same act for 30 years. You can predict it, heck you could standup and do it.

            This Birdy News site is losing its edge.

        2. TeeCee Gold badge
          Mushroom

          Re: As reported yesterday by other sites...

          "Really. its old."

          Not here it isn't. Makes me chuckle whenever it comes up.

      2. Anonymous Coward
        Anonymous Coward

        @C.

        No, I did. And although the Reuters article was linked to, other websites (e.g. MacRumors) covered this story a few hours before that one appeared.

        The point I was trying to make was that with this type of coverage, you might as well just publish the links to other sites. El Reg is slow off the bat reporting them – normally a whole day, or longer if the story broke on a Friday – and just printing the links would save time and its not as if we’re missing much. Apart from tossing in terms ‘Foxconn-rebrander’, this kind of article adds nothing to reports from other sites – it’s filler pure and simple… of the laziest hack kind.

        1. Intractable Potsherd
          Pint

          @AC.

          I have time to read one tech site a day, so I'm a definite supporter of El Reg's reporting of things I may not see anywhere else.

          "Foxconn-rebrander" may not be entirely correct, and it could be applied to other companies, but when a thing is sold on its "uniqueness", it doesn't hurt to point out the utter fallacy in that.

          Regarding Lewis, it seems that there are a lot of people that don't like hearing things that challenge their points of view. That is their problem, not Lewis or El Reg.

          <-<- Beer for the staff!

          1. Anonymous Coward
            Anonymous Coward

            Re: @AC.

            "I have time to read one tech site a day, so I'm a definite supporter of El Reg's reporting of things I may not see anywhere else."

            I'm wasn't saying that it shouldn't - but was commenting on the *quality* of some of the reporting.

  6. This post has been deleted by its author

  7. ukgnome
    Alert

    Apple? Sounds more like

    The umbrella corporation

  8. hexx
    Trollface

    when is samsung building their own campus? - just asking ;)

    1. Pax681

      they have several.. in Korea.... London,..US...Singapore......Australia...

      so... hexx... your point is???

      1. hexx

        seen the icon? it's troll, troll alert ;)

      2. Anomynous Coward

        Samsung have several.. in Korea.... London,..US...Singapore......Australia...

        And do these HQs have rounded corners like Apple's?

    2. My backside

      I know one thing...

      I don't know when, but I know what it will look like: a huge, open oval. Of course then Samsung will claim that they did NOT copy Apple.

      1. Richard 81

        Re: I know one thing...

        Expect to see a patent for this design being accepted by the USPO any time soon.

  9. kyza
    Trollface

    *cough*

    Top of the market

    Hubris

    Giant new HQ

    Only one way to go

    *cough*

  10. Chrissy
    Mushroom

    Unfortunate name....

    ...Oppenheimer.

    If I was a Cupertinian, my objection to planning permission would include the line:

    "One Oppenheimer nuked a small corner of Nevada, and another one is now wanting to nuke a small corner of California."

    1. dogged
      Pint

      Re: Unfortunate name....

      Agreed.

      All future Reg references to this guy should be as "Oppenheimer (no relation)". Right, Drew?

      1. Sandtitz Silver badge
        Pint

        Re: Unfortunate name....

        How do you know this Apple CFO dude isn't related to the Shiva-Destroyer-of-Worlds-dude?

  11. Mike Powers

    Cupertino residents should keep their mouths shut...

    ...if they know what's good for them. After all, I'm sure they don't want a "low-income housing" project to go on the space instead, like happened up in Marin...

  12. sandman

    Inspired by GCHQ? Closed, secretive, techie.....

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      And full of holes!

  13. Don Jefe
    Meh

    Why Bother

    If I were on the planning council it would be hard for me to get behind this. It is so unique that there's no chance of finding another tennent after Apple gets off its plateau in a few years. Then we'd just be left with a big donut.

    1. Marty
      Big Brother

      Re: Why Bother

      It is so unique that there's no chance of finding another tennent...

      Its high tech office space in CA...... I dont see a problem there...

      add to that, its going to be made largely of glass, which will mean a steel subframe, it is quite proberble that an enterprising person would come along, snap it up cheap and make a few quid out of recycleing the glass and steeel....

      big brother.... well it is apple innit

      1. Don Jefe

        Re: Why Bother

        The problem is that most of those CA towns learned their lessons when "HUGE UNSTOPPABLE COMPANIES THAT WILL LAST FOREVER - NEW ECONOMY - FREEBIRD" didn't quite last forever and they were stuck with buildings no one wanted and the town couldn't afford to get rid of. My town went through this with a commercial locomotive service facility. This 230,000 sqFT facility had a solid copper roof and granite walls - salvage profit? -$1,200,000.

        Most exterior commercial building glass is not recyclable, there's pretty much no glass in it, all non-recyclable plastics. Secondly it costs more to cut the steel and transport it than it is worth.

    2. Jwdb
      Unhappy

      Re: Why Bother

      So we should aim for the lowest common denominator, for mediocrity? This is the reason US residential architecture (sprawl, more specifically) is derided as "cookie-cutter".

      The US has some fantastic architects - use them!

    3. Jan 0 Silver badge
      Joke

      Re: Why Bother

      You mean they're going to consume the world's supply of Tennents? That's certainly a way to get off their plateaux!

  14. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    If they don't let them build it they will relocate. It's as simple as that.

    What is better, a ghost town or a busier town?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      "If they don't let them build it they will relocate. It's as simple as that."

      Yes, I remember when I was in the area 12-ish years ago (from what I can tell, I lived about 10 mins walk from where this will be built!) that Fry's Electronics wanted to replace their Fremont store with a much bigger mega-store which I think went against local planning guidance. So they simply went to the City council and said "we'd love to be able to keep on paying you all the city sales tax that you levy on our sales, which will be even bigger in the new store, but if you don't give us planning permission then we'll reluctantly have to ask if one of your neighbouring cities would like us to move there instead" ... needless to say the new mega-store was approved.

      BTW, given the plans for this new campus seem to be designed around the ability to keep all employees "inside the circle" at Apple only restauants etc to avoid gossip then its not exactly going to do much for a "busier town" ... apart from at morning and evening commute!

      Finally, note the circular offices are 4 floors high ... again seem to recall that (at least for residential property) Cupertino city had a rule of no more than one floor - something to do with not having your "yard" overlooked by neighbours.

  15. Ben Burch

    If they don't approve...

    ... we'd love to see them in the Chicago area!

  16. LinkOfHyrule
    FAIL

    Rip off of BBC TV Centre

    Apple/Steve stealing shit from others and claiming it as their own invention again.

    1. Ted Treen
      Facepalm

      Re: Rip off of BBC TV Centre

      Or rounding off the Pentagon, perchance? Maybe copying the Coliseum?

      I've never read such utter tripe. And that's saying something, with El Reg's regular Apple-bashing seminars...

  17. Spaller

    Applitron

    I call it the applitron.

    Bike paths, huh?

    My San Jose councilman says he installed 200 Led streetlights in order to get my vote.

    Who'd you pick? San Jose or Cupertino.

  18. Tasogare
    Trollface

    "A futuristic erection..."

    I beg to differ. Symbolically, this is clearly a hole, not a pole.

  19. Stevie

    Fools!

    Who would want what is clearly a cyclotron collider facility in their back yard?

    Try getting a 4G signal in *that* town once the supecooled magnets are online and the Higgs Bosons are spewing all over the place.

    Truly, will no-one think of the children?

    1. Robert Forsyth

      Re: Fools!

      There is a similar looking synchrotron near the Rutherford Labs near Didcot, Ox.

      Perhaps instant travel will be available between Cupertino, Cheltenham and Didcot.

  20. Joe User
    Joke

    If the public were allowed in...

    Hey Tony, what's the deal with that big guy in the chair, and the giant eggs in the basement?

    (Cut scene to the basement, where the top of an egg peels open.)

    1. LaeMing
      Go

      Re: If the public were allowed in...

      Egads! you are right.

      And here was I foolishly waiting for the Ori to come out of it.

  21. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Sooo..

    Where do I sign up? I'll take 1 of the 12,000 jobs they have to offer--even if its to replace the lost spot at 1 inf. lane.

  22. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    prior art

    Many moons ago I was asked to come up with a development proposal for a large area of local wasteland as part of GCSE coursework in geography. This looks remarkably similar to the portfolio I put forward - now, who do I sue?

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: prior art

      What are you saying, you invented the toroid?

  23. TimChuma
    Mushroom

    An oldie, but a goody

    In article <rone.9j2jd0$89...@ennui.org>, "cave deum" <^#...@ennui.org>

    wrote:

    > i'm kidding. crack will be passé in 3001.

    [Interior of Arco-Habitat 39B, Ganymede Altruity. Several hundred

    silver-jumpsuit-clad ascetics line the interior of a cuboctahedron-

    shaped chamber in shining white. Silver wires are connected to

    each one at the base of the skull.]

    ASCETIC 1138 I rejoice in my transhumanity!

    ASCETIC 124C41+ I rejoice in your rejoicing!

    ASCETIC 1138 I rejoice in your rejoicing at my rejoicing!

    [SFX: Ding]

    [A 900-FOOT STEVE JOBS materializes in the center of the chamber.]

    STEVE JOBS GET A MAC!

    ASCETIC 124C41+ I rejoice in your condescension!

    ASCETIC 1138 Everything is perfect now!

    [A BLONDE IN RED SHORTS bursts into the chamber directly

    opposite our two ASCETICS and tosses a hammer at 900-FOOT

    STEVE JOBS. The hammer hits STEVE JOBS in the middle of

    the forehead, causing him to double over and exposing...]

    ASCETIC 124C41+ CRACK!

    ASCETIC 1138 CRACK!

    ASCETIC 124C41+ I am revolted and horrified. I reject

    transcendence and all associated states of

    metahuman superconsciousness!

    ASCETIC 1138 And where's our 2GHz Son of Pismo with stamped

    enameled metal enclosures? I ask you!

    ASCETIC 124C41+ BURN BABY BURN!

    [The inhabitants of Arco-Habitat 39B break through the outer

    shell and are blown out onto the airless, frigid surface of

    Ganymede, surveyed only by the pitiless cyclopean eyeball of

    the planet Jupiter. But then TOYNBEE RESURRECTS THE DEAD.]

    --

    Matt McIrvin

  24. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Typical Apple

    Circular buildings suck. Nothing fits well inside, and a lot of space is wasted trying to get rectangular-ish desks / cubicles arranged efficiently in the curving space. As a resident in such a building either you get lucky by being at the edge and get a lot of space, or you're closer to the centre and get more crammed in.

    Architecturally they look fab, but from a purely practical point of view they're not so clever.

    Which is somewhat typical of Apple I think; form over function every time.

    Apple may well overestimate the number of employees that they can actually comfortably fit in this design. They may have to cram people closer together more than they thought. The risk is that the working environment will actually turn out to be crap, which is the exact opposite of their aim of making an environment in which staff feel comfortable and able to relax. And that wouldn't discourage them from going to off-site bars and leaving iPhones everywhere.

    1. Peter Stone
      Happy

      Re: Typical Apple

      Hang on, who said anything about rectangular shaped desks? surely all apple employees need is a chair & a space for their iPads.

  25. Quinch
    Angel

    Somehow I fail to be surprised at yet another, if literal, implementation of the "walled garden" principle.

  26. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    British Intelligence Wantabe

    It's is remarkable how much the building looks like British Intelligence Agency GCHQ

    Their emulation goes beyond appearance, iCloud makes Apple another Big Brother just like GCHQ and NSA they are tracking everything you do.

  27. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Copy Cat!

    http://goo.gl/DY6It

  28. Fill
    Coffee/keyboard

    Loaded statement

    I live near a major HP campus and it isn't public. It's a fortress with barbed wire and guards. A former coworker of mine used to work there and had a horror story of leaving his badge behind when he went to the cafeteria for lunch and was ridiculously told he could not leave it without producing his ID. He said his only choice was to run through the halls with mall-cops (ok, campus-cops) chasing him to beat them back to his desk where he left his badge to prove he was an employee. If Apple owns the land and it's a place of business, they can reserve the right to restrict parts or all of it from the public.

    1. Anonymous Coward
      Anonymous Coward

      Re: Loaded statement

      But the implication is that Apple are making a green and pleasant land from what is a brownfield site and that local business should laud this fact(ion) to the local authorities despite getting no benefit from it whatsoever save the view of the mothership and its workers antlike trails in and out at dawn and dusk.

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