back to article It's, it's, a red-and-blue striped golfing umbrella... Facebook teaches its online tat bazaar to auto-identify stuff for sale

Facebook has revamped Marketplace, a platform where users can buy and sell stuff, with a bunch of AI-powered features that, it claims, can automatically recognize and label objects in pictures as well as transform 2D images into a 3D view. At the heart of what it calls its “universal computer vision system” is a model called …

  1. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    It's, it's, a red-and-blue striped golfing umbrella

    A female aardvark?

    1. David 132 Silver badge

      Re: It's, it's, a red-and-blue striped golfing umbrella

      The Bolivian Navy on manoeuvres in the South Pacific?

      1. Kane Silver badge
        Thumb Up

        Re: It's, it's, a red-and-blue striped golfing umbrella

        It's a small, off-duty Czechoslovakian traffic warden!

        1. David 132 Silver badge

          Re: It's, it's, a red-and-blue striped golfing umbrella

          It's a banana.

          It's an orange.

          It's an apple.

          "Hey, you taught him that? That's terrific! You guys should audition for What's My Fruit!"

  2. TechnicalBen Silver badge
    Terminator

    Hahahahahahahahha.

    I see absolutely no way this is going to go horribly wrong for buyers, and wonderfully well for FB and scammers. Nope. None at all. FB certainly will not deny and fault in their least effort attempt with lowest overheads and supply of a service while taking the highest cut, and are in no way emulating Ebay with even less work (is that possible?).

  3. Pascal Monett Silver badge

    Rotating View

    That sounds awesome. Give four or five pics of a chair and get a full 3D view of it. Wow. That is a worthy accomplishment.

    Too bad it's done by a privacy-invading ad monster.

    1. BenDwire

      Re: Rotating View

      But enough people don't care or understand. They only want cool new tech to show off to their followers.

      If I want a 3D representaion, then I'll go to a shop, and buy it from there.

      1. Glen 1 Silver badge
        Trollface

        Re: Rotating View

        "If I want a 3D representaion..."

        www.thingiverse.com

  4. Anonymous Coward
    Anonymous Coward

    Buyers interested in a particular item can describe what they're looking for

    So if I ask for an intimate feminine cleansing device, will it show me a picture of their CEO?

  5. not.known@this.address Silver badge
    Big Brother

    Be afraid. Be very afraid.

    "Going one step further, it would advance visual search to make your real-world environment shoppable. If you see something you like (clothing, furniture, electronics, etc.), you could snap a photo of it and the system would find that exact item, as well as several similar ones to purchase right then and there.”

    Setting aside any issues of potential vendors paying to have their products bumped up the list of "similar ones to purchase right there and then", how long before they decide to create a 'dating' app and add this to Facebook... "Hey! You've photographed the person standing in the doorway to your left! Here are a dozen similar-looking people in your area!" And even if they should somehow resist the temptation to monetise that sort of thing, you can bet other people will take advantage of the possibilities it offers...

    1. MiguelC Silver badge
      Coffee/keyboard

      Re: "even if they should somehow resist the temptation to monetise"

      HAHAHAHAHA BWAAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAH AAAHHHHHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHHAAAAA!!!!!

      Got any other good ones?

  6. Cynic_999 Silver badge

    Better than seller's description/keywords?

    If a seller is able to falsify their description of the product, surely they can also falsify a photograph of the product? In any case, if I am searching for an item, I'd much rather have the search based upon the seller's description than an AI interpretation of photographs.

    1. IGotOut Silver badge

      Re: Better than seller's description/keywords?

      Yeah, they are stock images, library pictures or simply lifted off the web.

      eBay is rammed full off them, so it will be nothing different here.

  7. IGotOut Silver badge

    Just get it over with..

    give us the pill, stick us in some goo and just give us everything YOU think we should see, hear, feal, smell and touch.

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